Tag: chicago

Peter Thiel’s Evil Spy Machine Knows More About You Than You Do

Silicon Valley's bastard son has created something far more sinister than Facebook.

Expert Multi-Tasker Donald Trump Still Finds Time To Sue His Way Out Of Taxes

Nobody has to say 'Don't ever change, Donald.' He's utterly incapable of not being a small-time crook at heart.

Steel Yourself For Wonkette’s Pittsburgh Drinky Thing, Right This Dang Afternoon!

Pittsburgh. Drinky Thing. GO NOW.

Chicago, Take Away The Greatest Part Of Me! (TONIGHT!)

Baby please don't go! Wait, do go! TO SEE US!

MADISON, Wisconsin, Behold The Mermaid! (The Mermaid Is Wonkette, TONIGHT!)

GET IT? DO YOU GET IT? I GET IT.

Look At These Beautiful Children And Their Gun Control WALKOUT! LOOK AT THEM!

Now we adults need to live up to the example the kids have set.

Minneapolis/St. Paul, We’re Gonna Make It Tonight After All!

KNOCK KNOCK MOTHERFUCKER.

Russia Fires Rex Tillerson. Wonkagenda For Tues., March 13, 2018.

House Republicans rush to judgment, Rex Tillerson YOU'RE FIRED, and the UK is ready to lock and load. Your morning news brief.
And for what? For a little loud music. There's more to life than worrying about loud music, you know. Don'tcha know that?

Fargo, North Dakota, It’s A Beautiful Day!

No, it's Tuesday, not today. We just came early. It's a real problem sometimes.

A Gun In Every Classroom. Wonkagenda For Mon., March 12, 2018

Trump has some thoughts about guns, Chuck Todd is woke, and Betsy DeVos doesn't know shit. Your morning new brief.

Midterm Madness: Illinois 5th, and the Lying, Lady-Punching Douchebag

There's a Wolf in Illinois 5th District, and we're going to flush the son of a bitch out.

Is Wonkette’s GET YOUR GUNS OFF MY LAWN Tour Coming At YOU NEXT WEEK? (Yes.)

For certain values of 'you.' Best click through and find out!

Big News Day For Hannity And Tucker Carlson! Scary Messicans, Hillary Clinton, And Some Mad Cracker

Fox really is covering a completely different planet.

Please Send Wonkette To The #Teens’ March For Our Lives, Because I Really Fucking Want To Go

YOU GUYS. IT IS MY BIRTHDAY. GIVE US ALL THE MONEY TO GO TO THE MARCH THING, WITH THE TEENS, FOR NO GUNS.

Robert Mueller Has Barely Even Begun To Kick Paul Manafort In The Dick

Oh look, it's Paul Manafort running away with bags of money again! Catch him!