Wonkette

On Monday, I directed you to an ultra-glamorous velvet painting of the secretary of state as an example of the wonderful world of Condi-inspired art. Since I was in a Condicentric mood (as usual), I never thought to see what else this gifted painter had to offer. Well, let me tell you, the Condi painting on black velvet was only the tip of a fabulous iceberg! Join me after the jump to marvel over Velvet Rove, Velvet Cheney, Velvet Ashcroft and… Velvet Lynndie England? Are these the most superfantastic portraits of our time? Probably!

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Each week, veteran Condiwatcher Peter Huestis (also known as Princess Sparkle Pony) provides a summary of the searing wit and infinite wisdom of America’s Favorite Princess Diplomat™! Last week was all about Condi’s big Carnival o’ Peace™ in Annapolis. Yes! That was only a few days ago! Not much happened, but that didn’t stop people from writing about it. Plus: more excerpts from Elizabeth Bumiller’s Condiography which is maybe going to be serialized in Maureen Dowd’s column. And, finally, it was Mean Caricature Week! After the jump, we’ll relive the Condiweek that was.

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Attention, Poughkeepsie, New York: Vice President Dick Cheney is coming to town, and he will be armed. I repeat: HE WILL BE ARMED. We know he will be hunting, but we don’t what he’ll be hunting. Consider yourselves warned.
Exclusive: Cheney to hunt in Dutchess County again {Poughkeepsie Journal]

Honestly, can you blame Dick Cheney for falling asleep during yesterday’s cabinet meeting about the California fires? Cheney doesn’t want to have to listen to a bunch of boring stuff about environmental crap! Especially in California! We’ve seen this before, of course, but the last time, at least Dick had the sense to have a prop briefing on his lap that he could pretend to be “reading”. Just wake him up when he’s finally allowed to bomb Iran, OK? MORE »

This is getting deeply suspicious. Cheney fled Washington the day before the Election, supposedly to some hunting lodge in South Dakota. MORE »

Cheney-enabling fearmonger Stephen Hayes will take some time off from writing White House propaganda for the Weekly Standard to write Dick Cheney’s “biography,” according to U.S. News & World Report.

Cheney’s bio will presumably be as full of VP propaganda and disinformation as another Hayes’ book, “The Connection: How al Qaeda’s Collaboration with Saddam Hussein Has Endangered America.”

The relationship works like this: Cheney releases “intelligence” to a friendly coconspirator, said coconspirator types it up for the Standard or WSJ or (in Judith’s case) the New York Times, and Cheney then quotes the article in question as justification for whatever batshit evil scheme he’s currently cooking up.

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Vice President Dick Cheney, left, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, center, and Secretary of Homeland Security Michael Chertoff wait for the arrival of President Bush and Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper in the East Room of the White House Thursday, July 6, 2006 in Washington. (AP Photo/Charles Dharapak)