Tag: census

Hmm Could This Whole Anti-Government TeaBag Mob Backfire On Republicans?

It seems kind of crazy to think that encouraging a bunch of ignorant, racist, paranoid fucktards to hate the United States Government might actually backfire on the Republicans who would like to be in charge of that very same...

SCANDAL: Obama Fills Out Census Form, Is Black

Of course this story got buried on the weekend, when nobody pays attention to anything. Obama, that thief who somehow won the election by getting all those popular and electoral votes, filled out his nasty socialist Census -- when...

Liberals Misconstrue Erick Erickson, Who Will Not Shoot Census Workers Like He Said He Would

Wingnuts are, have been, and will be for the foreseeable future furious over the tyrannical overreach inherent in the ACS survey, a more detailed extension of the Census that the government will make a few million people fill out...

Dumb Local Officials To Blame For Missing Census Forms

During yesterday's National Day of the Census -- do you remember? did you get good presents? -- we wondered why so many people (including your editors) didn't get a census form. How are we supposed to report the eleventeen...

Happy Socialist Census Day: Did You Get a Census Form?

We heard on the radio that today was National Census Celebration Day, in celebration of the Census, which is happening now, as Wolf Blitzer might say, if he knew anything about what was happening. And then, on the radio,...

Southern Racists Will Declare Themselves As Such, On Their Census Forms

Good news, oppressed white slobs of the South! This year, you can finally escape the cruel fate of being a worthless minority by declaring your Racist Heritage on the U.S. Socialist Census. Awesome? In response to the race question...

Didn’t Chuck Grassley Promise America He Would Give Up Twitter For Lent?

Oh hey Monday was Twitter Day, the day when Republicans celebrate that time Chuck Grassley descended from Mount Sinai with One Hundred Forty Characters written on two enormous BlackBerry tablets. Let us pray. "Why does Harry Reid hate the...

Ha Ha It Says ‘Negro’ On The Census Form

Back when America was awesome, black people were called "Negroes." Sure, the title may have implied that black people were a separate sub-human species, but everyone was cool with that until the ACLU or ACORNS probably filed a lawsuit...

STRANGE CENSUS MARKETING CAMPAIGN STARTS TODAY: Basically what you do is fill out your census form and get rewarded with a coupon for buffalo wings: "On Monday, Census Director Robert Groves starts the nationwide campaign with an event in...

Jim Inhofe Didn’t Even Read ‘Harry Potter,’ But He Still Hates Mudbloods

Ken Layne reviews Infinite Jest, or some other book. Honestly, there's really no point in reading something you've already been paid to vote against. Convicts need their stimulus checks just as much as the next guy. How else can...

Bachmann Says ACORN Will Use Census For Internment Camps

Something like that at least; she may have said these things before: "If we look at American history, between 1942 and 1947, the data that was collected by the census bureau was handed over to the FBI and other...

What You Don’t Know Can’t Hurt Them

We’re Number 4! We’re Number 4!