Guess who has a secret? Intern Justin, Justin Charity, he has a secret! Very recently, Justin casually mentioned that he worked in IOWA this summer for [I'm not telling which candidate!]. Not only did he work there, he INTERNED there, as is the employment tendency of Intern Justin. Why didn’t he tell us sooner? Well, it’s not like we ask for a resume or anything during the intern hiring process. Anyway, Intern Justin would like to share his experiences in Iowa to clear up some common misconceptions about it — pig sex, corn shits, racist hicks, things like that. Read Intern Justin’s manifesto after the jump. MORE »

Barry Hussein is on something of a roll in Iowa, but even he knows that without throwing some dirt Clintonward, he’ll have trouble keeping that momentum based on The Face alone. Today, he launched a new site on his Internets called “Hillary Attacks,” the logo of which is reminiscent of cable news coverage circa midday 9/11. His strategy with “Hillary Attacks” is pretty transparent: Since he’s too much of a pussy to attack anyone, he shows how Hillary is constantly attacking people, which… um… you can’t do during elections because it’s too mean! MORE »

The Fred Thompson team announced its two Virginia campaign chairs today. One of them you’ve heard of, and the other is also a douchebag. Probably. Some state politician. MORE »

From Slate’s Trailhead: “Ron Paul’s indefatigable grassroots supporters are ‘moneybombing’ the campaign today, partly to pay homage to Guy Fawkes, the bomber-with-a-cause featured in V for Vendetta, and partly just because they felt like it. As of this writing, Paul has already raised $2.5 million.” How can you people defend this revolutionary dumbspeak now? Wasn’t the $9 dollars it cost to see V for Vendetta enough money to waste in the name of Guy Fawkes?

Ron Paul Gets Bombed [Trailhead]

From Slate’s Trailhead: “Ron Paul’s indefatigable grassroots supporters are ‘moneybombing’ the campaign today, partly to pay homage to Guy Fawkes, the bomber-with-a-cause featured in V for Vendetta, and partly just because they felt like it. As of this writing, Paul has already raised $2.5 million.” How can you people defend this revolutionary dumbspeak now? Wasn’t the $9 dollars it cost to see V for Vendetta enough money to waste in the name of Guy Fawkes?

Ron Paul Gets Bombed [Trailhead]

The John McCain campaign has been sending some very forward e-mails to its supporters recently in a shameless attempt to build equity. Poor guy has to eat Ramen and charcoal until the AmEx bills are paid off, so we’re glad to pass the tin change can around. Still, McCain Campaign Manager Rick Davis realizes that leading e-mails with “The time to donate is NOW!” might be off-putting to the 14 chimpanzees/members of ABBA that still support him. As a result, Davis sent a new e-mail yesterday commemorating October 26, 2007 as the 40th anniversary of the day McCain was shot down in Vietnam. It’s a delightful history tale, and how kind of him to educate us — who knew this McCain dude had such a rough life? And why did those meanie pants bum-faced Vietcong treat him like that? It’s as if Davis is trying to guilt-trip us pussies into donating…. MORE »

A Wonkette operative sends us this photo while out on the campaign trail working for NJ Dems. It came with a reservoir of campaign photo signs and a second donkey angling for straw. “This was my morning. Never a dull day in the Garden State.”
— Eric Pfeiffer