Tag: business insider

We Found A Fast Food CEO Who Is Not Entirely A Jerkface

Wait, we have a Nice Time story about a fast food company? Seriously? That's a thing?! Well, golly gee willikers! Yes, it turns out Sonic CEO Clifford Hudson is not a deranged sociopath willing to paint a dire, ludicrously unrealistic...

Evil Carl’s Jr. CEO Can Hardly Wait To Replace Workers With Robots

Are you ready to meet the most dickheaded CEO in the fast food game today? Well, tough noogies, you're going to anyway, because this a-hole deserves to be recognized. One of the arguments opponents of a minimum wage hike LOOOOOOOOVE...

Mean Old Government Trying To Stifle Corporations’ Sacred Right To Screw Consumers

First, Elizabeth Warren decided to persecute fraudulent banksters by naming names of corporate bad actors who were the opposite of persecuted. Senator Warren, have you no shame support of a Justice Department that merely equates fines to justice?...

Guy Running For Illinois Gov Cheated On First Wife 20 Years Ago, And Business Insider Is ON IT.

Where were you when you heard the news that some guy running for Illinois governor cheated on his first wife 20 years ago? Was it right now, because who the fuck cares, Jesus Christ? Nobody seems to have picked...

Business Insider Finds Your Futurist Sci-Fi Tech Dreams Hilarious, You Silly American People

Business Insider has breaking news: Americans believe crazy shit about science. Just think of the 18% of  people who believe The Flintstones was loosely based on a true story. The National Science Foundation must have wept when they realized...

Free Speech For Tech Dudes Is Dead In America Because You People Can’t Take A Joke

So there has been a much-needed spate of thinkpieces of late about why there are so few women in tech. Consensus: because tech dudes are often sexist bags of brogrammer skin and maybe kinda ladies don't want to hang...

Commies at ‘Business Insider’ Just Cold Destroying Capitalism Now

How wonderful, the last time we checked in with Business Insider they were running articles on how you are not a winner if you want to see your wife and kids every so often, but now they are run...

Playing With Your Children Is For Losers, Says Business Insider

Nothing says “winning” like abandoning your loved ones to make money for your corporate overlords, amiright guys? I mean, is the guy in the $6,000 suit going to have a “work-life balance”? COME ON. He is not, because he is...

Pew Poll Demonstrates That Americans, Republicans, Not *That* Stupid

Hey-O, who has two thumbs and isn't as stupid as you might have been led to believe? Oh, just 62% of Americans and 35% of Republicans, who think that the Republican party has become "too extreme." For the record,...

Glenn Beck Going To Be So Sad, You Guys

We come bearing devastating news. Actually two pieces of news, one devastating and one not-as-devastating. The first piece of news is that the Golden Era is over. As in, the price of gold cannot be expected to continue rising...

Mitt Romney Isn’t Telling Us Exactly How He Will Ruin The Housing Sector

Good news, everyone! Romney/Ryan have no specific plans to ruin the housing sector at this point, which is probably a good thing, given that Mitt Romney has been pretty clear about his interest in ruining education and Paul Ryan...