Meet Henry Paulson’s Hilarious New Financial Overhaul Package!
Monday, March 31st, 2008
Today the Bush administration offered its brave response to the current financial crisis, as delivered by Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson. The administration has faced overwhelming pressure to give the government more oversight and regulation within the financial markets, since every major player (investment banks, hedge funds) keeps dying and then asks the government for money. And who better to ramp up regulation on investment banks than Henry Paulson, the former C.E.O. of Goldman Sachs! So what’s in his funny new oversight package, and how will it not do anything save the economy again? MORE »
Another loser official from the Bush Administration is stepping down to spend time with the family, but there’s something especially funny about the departure of Emilio Gonzalez from the U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services agency — because Gonzalez wrote a big whiny blog post (on the Department of Homeland Security blog, of course) about how the New York Times 
Ex-chief of staff to Dick Cheney, known perjurer and wuss jail-dodger I. Lewis “Scooter” Libby has been disbarred, according to a D.C. Court of Appeals ruling. The cut-and-running court explained: “When a member of the Bar is convicted of an offense involving moral turpitude, disbarment is mandatory.” Yes, dumb old Scooter was a textbook case of “moral turpitude,” that old scourge of an offense. Remember when he lied all those times? They were the most morally turpitudinous lies since the great Turpitude Outbreak of 1913. [
A private spy company worked for years tracing Al Qaeda’s Internet and video distribution network, and was finally able to grab terrorist propaganda before it was released to the public. So it was a proud moment when the intelligence contractor, SITE Institute, presented the White House with a brand new Al Qaeda video — Bin Laden with his “Just For Men” beard dye job — on the condition that it be kept secret until Al Qaeda made it public.
Have you heard the story of the man who is secretly the most powerful and evil member of the Bush administration? It is one of Washington’s best-kept secrets, which means that all the major and minor news magazines have run lengthy profiles on him, calling him secretly one of the most powerful and evil members of the Bush administration. His name is David S. Addington, he was Cheney’s lawyer, and now he is Cheney’s chief of staff. 
It’s almost too depressing to mention again, but let’s recap the Pat Tillman revelations from Army medical examiners and internal Pentagon reports released last week and find out what happens when famous football stars turned Army Heroes 
Back in the late ’70s, two kindly yet inept gentlemen were elected as president and vice president, simply because their names weren’t Nixon, Agnew or Ford. One of those men, former VP and failed 1984 Dem presidential nominee Walter Mondale, now wants you to know that Dick Cheney isn’t the only super-powerful Dr. Evil in recent presidential history. Turns out Walter Mondale kicked a lot of ass back in the day, but he did it with the utmost gentility and old-fashioned midwest manners. 
Patrick Leahy has subpoenaed Karl Rove, which means Rove must testify before the Senate Judiciary Committee — but not really, although the Senate and House continue to sort of act like they have some kind of authority over the White House. 