bryan fischer

Jesus looked at him and loved him. “One thing you lack,” he said. “Go, sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.” At this the man’s face fell. He went away sad, because he had great wealth. Jesus looked around and said to […]

Hey, Ladies of Wonket! Hope you’re all having a welcoming, nurturing, inviting day! It’s really a beautiful miracle how God made you so well-suited for secretarial and receptionist duties, because those are pretty much the only jobs you should consider while you wait to find a husband to take care of you (or become a […]

Would you believe that we have not brought you the thought-like pronouncements of the American Patriarchy Association’s Bryan Fischer since December? Too long! And it seems that Mr. Fischer has continued a little further down the tracks that he was laying last time, when he said that the First Amendment only applies to Christians, because […]

Jan Brewer’s uncrazy veto of SB 1062, the “No Dogs or Gays” bill, is not that big a surprise — unless of course you’re certain that your ability to keep God happy depends on being free to tell people to GTFO if you dislike what they do with their mooshy bits. If that’s what you […]

You may have read about the performance-art “Satanists” who have offered to build a monument on the grounds of the Oklahoma Statehouse; under the law’s clause claiming that the state doesn’t favor “any particular religion or denomination,” it looks like the law pretty much says the state would have to allow it, right? Not so […]

Welcome to yet another Derp Roundup, the weekly feature where we hose off our browser and serve up a cocktail of stories that were too stoopid to ignore altogether, but not quite worth a full post of their own. We’ll start with a seasonal sampling of the War On Christmas, with American Patriarchy Association president […]

Welcome to another edition of Derp Roundup, our weekly collection of cranky crap that wasn’t worth a full post, but was too incandescently stoopid to ignore altogether. First up, Bryan Fischer told all his followers on Twitter today to go read this shocking billion-word exposé of what Teh Ghey is really all about, as explained […]

Bryan J. Fischer, the issues director of the good ol’ American Family Association, who has many interesting Thoughts on interesting Topics, has some airtight logic for us, and that is that if the Founders did not want a Christianist theocracy, then why did they put a date on the Constitution, HENGGHHHHH? Did Bryan J. Fischer […]

An early squirmish in the War On Christmas has erupted over an ornament sold by Hallmark; the ornament depicts a traditional Ugly Christmas Sweater with lines from “Deck the Halls” on it, but “Don we now our gay apparel” has been changed to “Don we now our FUN apparel.” A few people rolled their eyes […]

Fire up the Debunk-O-Matic 5000 and get ready to start sending your wingnut co-workers to snopes.com, folks! Fox & Friends and the American Patriarchy Association’s Bryan Fischer are among several conservative outlets pitching a selectively edited video that appears to show Illinois school official Amanda August saying that under the Common Core standards, it won’t […]

The American Patriarchy Association’s Bryan Fischer believes in resurrection, so on Thursday’s edition of the Bryan Fischer Balderdash Radio Hour he brought back a conspiracy theory from two years ago: the claim that Barack Obama was photoshopped into a photo of the White House Situation Room on the night he singlehandedly didn’t murder Osama Bin […]

Here is a video of the American Patriarchy Association’s Bryan Fischer casually telling a story about a couple of encounters that he’s had with real actual demons. No big whoop, just another day for a Slayer. It’s part of a longer segment on his dumb radio show where he talks about the popular ghosty movie […]

It appears — perhaps and maybe! — that possibly there is somewhat of a fuffle in Egypt. If you want visuals without any explanation, ABCNews has an un-narrated video feed from Tahrir Square, where people are waving enough handheld lasers to make for a pretty good Pink Floyd show.

Oh, golly, kids, we think the SCOTUS decisions throwing out DOMA and Prop 8 may have actually broken poor Bryan Fischer. Just look at the sorry mess he threw up on the American Patriarchy Association’s blog Thursday. See, he’s going to really rip on those liberal Justices, using their own twisted sick logic to expose […]

Poor Bryan Fischer! The spokesman for the American Patriarchy Association has a MAJOR sad today, and he has lots of company following the Supreme Court’s decision overturning DOMA. It would appear that actually treating all marriages as equal in the eyes of the law means the end of America, which would make today roughly the […]