Wonkette

Charlie Sheen is barking up the wrong controlled-demolition tree. If you want the real dirt on 9/11, you just need to watch a White House daily briefing. That crazy Tony Snow slips in some strange stuff!

Remember how Bush and Cheney wouldn’t go under oath or even On the Record for the 9/11 Commission? And how they would only talk together, to keep their bullshit story straight?

After the jump, thrill to the antics of the White House Press Corps as they lure Snow into a trap he may never escape.

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* CIA Director Porter Goss called it quits this week, and didn’t make up a reason for leaving. Not even the standard “time with my family” excuse, which of course makes us think it had something to do with the hookers or the gambling and payola. Anyway, he’s back on the gulf shore already, and everyone is waiting to hear who the next shady character to take over the job is going to be. MORE »

It begins in about 5 minutes. Pour out a 40 for him. Maybe this’ll be the one where he reveals that it was all a horrible, Ambien-induced hallucination. MORE »

At a roundtable with Latin American journalists, Bush proved that no matter how bad things get, it’s important to keep your sense of humor:

Q Mr. President, in Argentina, you will have a bilateral meeting with President Kirchner.
 THE PRESIDENT:  Si.
 Q What I want to know — sources of the government told me that they would ask you about more cooperation on support for Argentina, you know, in the IMF fund –
 THE PRESIDENT: IMF.
 Q Exactly.
 THE PRESIDENT: Please don’t tell me that the government leaks secrets about conversations to the –
 Q  Well, I have my sources in the government.
 THE PRESIDENT:  You do?  Okay, well I’m not going to ask you who they are, of course.  (Laughter.)
 Q  No, please. 
 THE PRESIDENT:  Inside joke here, for my team.

Er, yeah. Perhaps you should have tried to keep things inside to begin with, eh?

Speaking of things that shouldn’t get let out of the bag, we also liked his response to a question about Argentina building a nuclear reactor in Venezuela:

Maybe it makes sense.  I haven’t really studied the proposal.  And I look forward to — hope President Kirchner shares with me the concept, the notion, the idea.

The proposal, the issue, the dream. Whatever. Don’t tell Korea. Also, he later invites the unfortunately named Macarena to dance on the table.

Does anyone know if disorientation is a symptom of avian flu?

Full briefing after the jump.

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