Tag Archives: boycotts

  Nice state you've got there -- shame if something were to happen to it

Corporations And Celebrities Agree: Anti-Gay Indiana Can Get Bent

On Thursday, wingnut Indiana Gov. Mike Pence signed his state’s Fuck The Gays bill into law, which basically says that as long as your religion tells you Jesus’s first and only question on Judgment Day will be “and how many of my gay children did you personally abuse?”, you are free to use those beliefs to deny LGBT people service and accommodations in the forgotten, godforsaken state of Indiana. Gov. Pence did so because apparently the threat of losing tourism dollars and business is less important than making sure nobody forces Aunt Lurlene to bake a pie for a fag. This is called Religious Freedom, and it is somehow what this great nation was founded upon, according to idiots. Read more on Corporations And Celebrities Agree: Anti-Gay Indiana Can Get Bent…
  wingnuts furious

Get Ready For Your Boycott And Counter-Boycott, Dos Equis

When the Most Interesting Man in the World holds a fundraiser for a certain Kenyan Anti-Colonial Marxist Communist Voodoo Witch, how do you think the Teatards feel about it? Happy? They feel happy, right? (Spoiler: They do not feel happy.) Well, we are getting to see this in action, because some sexy old beast is having a money-party for some other sexy beast, and so they are flocking to Dos Equis’ Facebook page to promise never to buy their Messican beer again! Read more on Get Ready For Your Boycott And Counter-Boycott, Dos Equis…
  Jesus these people

Wingnuts Furious: Obama Hugged A White Guy

Scott Van Duzer, the charming beefy pizzeria owner who gave President Barack Obama a big ol’ bear hug the other day, says that he has been targeted for retribution by angry Republicans who are boycotting his Fort Pierce, Florida, restaurant. He was also the target of a brief war on Yelp, between negative and positive reviews, most of which came, of course, from “reviewers” who have probably never even been to Florida for chrissakes and what is WITH people anyway? Read more on Wingnuts Furious: Obama Hugged A White Guy…
  New frontiers in cause and effect

Wingnut Boycotters Take Credit For Starbucks’ Business Cycle, JC Penney’s Lousy Management

What if they held a boycott and nobody stayed home? Protectors of traditional missionary-position-only marriage between straight people have been trying, without much success, to make big corporations stop being so darn gay. By most measures, the “One Million Moms” boycott of JC Penney Co and the The National Organization For Marriage boycotts of Starbucks Coffee had no measurable effects on sales (we now pause 20 seconds to let you get “OMM, NOM NOM NOM” out of your system. It is a reflex, just go with it). But happily for the activist groups, we’re still in a sluggish economy where stock performance, corporate profits, and consumer choices can fluctuate for a variety of reasons, so any bad news for either company MUST mean that the boycott has been a thundering success, so YAY for Traditional Marriage! Looks like another flawless victory for the Forces of Good. Read more on Wingnut Boycotters Take Credit For Starbucks’ Business Cycle, JC Penney’s Lousy Management…
  toucan sam says go fuck yourself

Tony The Tiger On Jon Stewart’s Vagina Manger: Tastes Grrrreat!

The Catholic League’s Bill Donohue is none-too-pleased with the Kellogg’s family of cereals, as it unaccountably refused to yield to his demands that it immediately stop advertising on the Jonathan Stewartsky Half-Hour Jew Hour That Hates Goys Full-Time. Oooooh, what’d Kellogg’s say to Bill Donohue? Did they tell him to get fucked? Yes. Yes they did. “We understand that our customers come from a variety of backgrounds, experiences, lifestyles, and cultures and we respect their individual decisions to choose the television programs that they deem acceptable for themselves and their families. Consumers speak most loudly when they vote with their remote control and change the channel or turn off the TV if a program does not fit their personal criteria.” Hahahahaha, that is corporate-speak for “well bless your heart,” which is southern lady for “fuck you in the ass face down on a gravel road,” which is southern man for “Well, fine fellow, I must civilly disagree!” And don’t think Bill Donohue doesn’t know exactly what he just heard! He’s so mad he’s about to go full-Nuge! Read more on Tony The Tiger On Jon Stewart’s Vagina Manger: Tastes Grrrreat!…
  a model of christian charity

Bloodthirsty Lesbian Spokesmodel Ellen Degeneres Murders Nice Christian Ladies ‘One Million Moms’

Having already been totally slaughtered, the Warriors for Tolerance, Empathy and Good Taste known as “One Million Moms” (seven moms) have declared victory against Ellen Degeneres (Saddam Hussein) in their fight against her Manchurian Candidate stealth mission to educate Americans to the benefits of the Jaclyn Smith Kardashian Kollection Olsen Twins fashion line. And that’s why you can’t have women in a foxhole. They just give up as soon as they have been totally annihilated! Also? Too mensy. Read more on Bloodthirsty Lesbian Spokesmodel Ellen Degeneres Murders Nice Christian Ladies ‘One Million Moms’…
  the homosexuals!

Everyone Boycotting Everything For Gayness and Jesus Purposes

ACTION ALERT! You may not be aware that there are products and services you are supposed to be boycotting right now, so your Wonkette reporter of homosexuals is here to save the day! Things used to be much simpler, back when the American Family Association was boycotting McDonald’s for their excessive gayness, by leaving hilarious comments on the internet about how their Real ‘Murkan families didn’t NEED no Big Macs, and could just suck their trans fats through a straw, like Jesus taught them in the Bible. However, this summer, things are Complicated, because everybody is boycotting everything, due to Too Many Gays, Not Enough Gays, Gays in France, Lesbian Carpenters, Gays on Skates, and of course, Messicans. So, let’s see if we can help everybody out with a handy guide! Read more on Everyone Boycotting Everything For Gayness and Jesus Purposes…
  haw haw

LADWP To Arizona: ‘Suck It, We Actually Own Your Power Plants’

Los Angeles Department of Water and Power general manager Austin Beutner just delivered a very quick, very brutal public response to some Arizona energy commissioner’s jackass threat to cut the electricity flowing from that racist state to LA. It is terse and kickass, and you must read it, in its entirety. Read more on LADWP To Arizona: ‘Suck It, We Actually Own Your Power Plants’…
  sure whatever

Arizona Jackass Threatens To Cut Off LA’s Power

Some Arizona energy commissioner is threatening to cut off electricity supplies to Los Angeles unless LA Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa renounces the city’s boycott. “I would be happy to help them to renegotiate the power agreements so they no longer receive power from Arizona,” commissioner Gary Pierce told ABC News. Arizona has a nuke plant plus some filthy coal plants, plus it takes hydropower from the Colorado River, which has been dammed and ruined for this purpose by awful people from Arizona (and the water is from the Rocky Mountains, not Arizona, which doesn’t have water), and some of this electrical power is sold to California — including about a quarter of LA’s electricity. This is what they’re going to do if you complain about them being actual Nazis. It’s going to be fun when Commander in Chief Barack Obama orders a U.S. military invasion of this rogue state, isn’t it? Better complete the danged fence on the northern and western and eastern borders, too! Read more on Arizona Jackass Threatens To Cut Off LA’s Power…
  by the time i don't get to phoenix

Boycott Arizona? Sure, Because It’s So Easy!

Have you people just HAD IT with Arizona being so evil and terrible and unleashing its dumb racist idiot garbage upon America again and again, forever? Boycott those jackholes. Gawker put together a list of some Arizona “big name” businesses you can boycott just in case you already avoid the state — like everyone except for 90-year-old retired white people from Chicago suburbs, who move there to die and complain about Mexicans and “dry heat.” Seriously, every known business from Arizona is terrible. Will you miss P.F. Chang’s or GoDaddy or SkyMall, three of the worst things in America that represent everything sleazy and shitty about this foul nation of slobs? Of course not. But what about the Grand Canyon? Read more on Boycott Arizona? Sure, Because It’s So Easy!…
  causal relationships

Freepers Are Going To Protest Existence Of Muslims By Boycotting Best Buy

OH woah woah woah, Best Buy has wished Muslims a Happy Eid al-Adha, the Islamic festival of sacrifice during which Muslims are traditionally encouraged to donate to charity?? Uhh nice try. Free Republic will boycott Best Buy now, just cold won’t shop there anymore, maybe it’ll even go out of business, right? And when all those Best Buy employees lose their jobs, terrorism/Muslims will be FINITIO. Read more on Freepers Are Going To Protest Existence Of Muslims By Boycotting Best Buy…
  vote with your dollars

Boycott Whole Foods! Or Don’t!

So so many ethical quandaries this week! Should “we” “forgive” Michael Vick for being a dog-tortoruing sociopath, because he paid his debt to society? Should “we” continue to patronize a food store whose CEO — a man whose douchebaggery was well-established years ago — recently revealed an unpalatably conservative bent vis-a-vis the topic of heatlhcare? These are important questions. Read more on Boycott Whole Foods! Or Don’t!…
 

Minneapolis Airport Police Conspiring To Destroy America’s Western Ranches! Or Something …

American hero and U.S. American Senator Larry Craig has a new ally in his brave battle to un-resign from the Senate and un-plead guilty to trying to get some dick in a public restroom. The American Land Rights Association has announced its support of Craig — one of the bravest, straightest men fighting for property rights in the Western United States — by calling for a boycott of Minneapolis-Saint Paul International Airport. Read more on Minneapolis Airport Police Conspiring To Destroy America’s Western Ranches! Or Something ……
 

Beer Boycott: The Hardest Decision Conservatives Ever Had to Make

The first email we got on the subject (we’re on all the psycho xenophobe mailing lists) was headlined “The End of Miller Time.” We read it and had no clue what the hell they were talking about: For some time we have known there are subversive corporations in our midst. One such corporation is the Miller Brewing Company which donated a substantial sum so that illegal aliens could takeover and demonstrate in our streets. By supporting those who break our laws to court Latino customers, Miller does not deserve the support of any American citizen–it’s time to put an end to Miller Time and let the boycott begin. We admired the opening sentence and imagined it being read by a young Orson Welles. Then we gave it no more thought. But it keeps coming. Learn the boycott details, or our hazy, alcohol-soaked recollection of them, after the jump. Read more on Beer Boycott: The Hardest Decision Conservatives Ever Had to Make…