It’s not Iran, but the Washington Post editorial board should be pleased to know that we’re bombing the dickens out of something: “NASA’s going for full impact Friday, firing a bomb-laden missile at the moon in a dramatic search for water. The National Aeronautics and Space Administration is sending its Lunar CRater Observing and Sensing Satellite (LCROSS) on a mission to fire a missile into the south pole of the moon as twice the speed of a bullet.” MORE »

Ha ha, so, funny story: a traveling Marine packed enough ammunition and explosives in his checked luggage to blow up, hmm let’s say a Pliosaur, and nobody really noticed or appeared to care until his luggage was inspected by TSA workers during a layover in Boston.Thus concluded the first incident in recorded history when TSA goons did something useful. MORE »

• WE ARE STILL BOMBING PAKISTAN ALL THE TIME: Sure Syria was big news this weekend, but did you know that US-led forces or CIA drones have been involved in 12 air strikes in Pakistan in the last 10 weeks? The Pakistani president does not care for this one bit. [ABC News (the Australian one)]

Ooh look, Barack Obama’s best terrorist friend Bill Ayers and his wife, famous “FBI Ten Most Wanted List” alum Bernardine Dohrn, have written a delightful romp about the dominance of white supremacy in the annals of American power to be published in 2009, right after a black dude becomes president. We smell a right-wing conspiracy! You know all of those recent Republican robocalls about Bill Ayers? Eh, just one of those fancy “viral marketing” strategies from New York City. Now the book will sell a billion copies and this couple will make a fortune on royalties. Think of all the cool bombs they’ll be able to buy now, HENNGGGHH? [Amazon]

Reason captured this billboard in Marion, Illinois, which is, heh heh, “innocently” in the same neighborhood as Bill Ayers (by several hundred miles). Right, like THAT’S A COINCIDENCE. Those terrorist are just so scared of John McCain, who knows that they exist somewhere, in one of the world’s eighty or ninety Mexicos, wherever, it doesn’t matter, they will be bombed at all times. The terrorist would literally prefer anyone else. Norm Podhoretz, Bill Kristol, any Kagan, name your favorite neocon, it doesn’t matter. Just not John “Bombs” McSlavepants. [Reason]

Toby Keith, the terrible country music singer who has spent the last seven years laughing at Arabs for getting killed by American bombs (2002 lyric: “we lit up your world like the Fourth of July”), is inexplicably a Democrat who supports Obama. This makes no sense. Perhaps he is one of those “Peter Beinart Democrats” who saturated our magazines and newspapers in the years after 9/11 — you know, like “we want sweeping health care reform, but we also really like bombing the shit out of Arabs.” Joe Lieberman is the worst … Wait, what was the question? Oh yes: weird redneck Toby Keith is a Democrat for Obama. [AP]

Be warned: America’s class of neoconservatives have suddenly grown a POWERFUL NEW BONER. Russia and Georgia’s conflict 20 billion miles away has opened the door for the New Cold World War III, this time with SURROUND SOUND AND TEMPERATURE CONTROLLING CUP HOLDERS AND DIGITAL FIRE STEAMFUCK LIBERTY NUKES. Have no fear, because whenever a former Commie aggressor threatens God’s Democracy somewhere in the world, there’ll always be a Kagan somewhere just stone cold writin’ killer op-eds denouncing those fuckers. MORE »

Because of the damn terrorists, hobos will now have to take off the roaster chickens they use as footwear before boarding planes. In the Chicago area last Friday, a “motorist” noticed a whole roaster chicken, presumably on the road, stuffed not with innards or stuffing or golden trinkets, but with an IED, to blow up America. The bomb was defused by Authorities, and it’s a damn good thing — apparently that was one of those “unfriendly” bombs that hurts people: “Police Capt. Matthew Catania would not describe the bomb, but said it was ‘capable of causing harm to a person.’” Do not eat Roaster Chickens, ever. [Chicago Sun-Times]

Here is presidential candidate and glorified hobo Ralph Nader speaking at the first “Cluster Bomb Olympics” in D.C. yesterday, courtesy of Wonkette hobo-security operative “Nicholas.” The event celebrates the humanity of cluster bombs, which are like clusterfucks, in bomb form. While Obama drew 75,000 people to his little vaudeville act in Portland yesterday, Nader probably got like 20. And that may be just enough to tip this election, again. [Ekklesia]

Now that “Pennsylvania is the new Iowa,” and the Democratic party is dead-set on making everyone hate politics even more, John McCain is going to pretend to be a senator again! Has he already forgotten that he is running for president? Or maybe he thought he never left the Mexican Hanoi Hilton where he was tortured as a baby during the Spanish Civil War? All of these things are true, and this is why he now plans on taking a 10-day “congressional delegation” trip to socialist Europe and communist Middle East. MORE »

One short day after George Bush made official his intention to sell $123 million worth of precision-guided bombs to the Saudis and Congress all but said it didn’t care, the Saudis have announced that, unsurprisingly, they don’t really care if our gas prices are a little bit high. MORE »