May 27, 2012
bob barr
Military Run By Witches! (?)
by Sara K. Smith 11:03 am February 17, 2010
Bob Barr, the former Libertarian presidential candidate and evil twin of Reverend Jeremiah Wright, wrote a very interesting thing today about how the military is infested with witches and warlocks! Did you know this? Did you know that they are cold dancin’ around bubbling cauldrons on Fort Hood and holding sexy outdoor rituals at the [...]
Wonkette Interviews Bob Barr At Weird-Sounding Reason Mag Party!
by Jim Newell 4:59 pm September 29, 2008
Your associate editor was prepared to go to this funny-sounding debate party last Friday at the D.C. headquarters of libertarian masturbation pamphlet Reason, one for which Bob Barr was invited to yell at Obama and McCain on the teevee, live. Ineffectiveness and vanity on this level is, of course, the very essence of libertarianism. So [...]
The State of Texas says you must file to be on the presidential ballot 70 days before the election, and both Barack Obama and John McCain allegedly missed the deadline, so now whackadoodle Libertarian Bob Barr will be President of Texas while the rest of the nation has to make do with the geezer or [...]
Obama’s Pack of Ravenous Hopewolves Will Literally Eat Palin Alive
by Juli Weiner 3:38 pm September 10, 2008
Huckabee and Barr will embarrass themselves publicly with some other losers, just to see who would fail more tragically as a stand-up comedian. [DCist] In her world-famous acceptance speech, Sarah of the North quoted some batshit Nazi who also wanted to assassinate FDR. [Ben Smith} Palin and McCain are pretending to have an extramarital maverick [...]
Ron Paul Embarrasses Phil Gramm At Press Conference
by Jim Newell 2:39 pm September 10, 2008
Ron Paul’s very special press conference has ended and, we regret to inform, it featured no “Tournament of Losers”-style death match among the various third-party candidates he invited. He totally copped out and endorsed three third-party candidates: Ralph Nader, Cynthia McKinney, and Chuck Baldwin. He was planning on endorsing Bob Barr, too, but selfish Barr [...]
Look, Ron Paul, YOU WIN, FINE, YOU AND YOUR SUPPORTERS ARE GREAT, now will you please go away for a long time and play with your gold bricks, alone? Of course he won’t, which is why he’s making yet another “special announcement” tomorrow about some useless new thing he’s cookin’ up. He’s almost as bad [...]
Obama, McCain To Be Interrogated By Goateed Evangelist In Megachurch Isolation Booths
by Ken Layne 12:44 am August 16, 2008
Some mega-suburban evangelical church in Southern California will be the scene of the most epic political battle since Jesus took on the Romans: Saturday at 5 p.m. (8 p.m. Eastern), Obama and McCain will be locked in soundproof glass torture chambers while a goateed “powerful evangelical” hobbit will chillingly ask them questions about religions and [...]
Ralph Nader Will Also Have a Political Convention In Minneapolis
by Ken Layne 5:29 pm August 12, 2008
First, plans were made for the Republican convention in St. Paul during the first week of September, at the Xcel Center, starring John “Oh him” McCain. Then, wacky freedom-fighter Ron Paul and his Campaign for Literacy anounced a Paultard rally, a weeklong thing that would also take place during the first week of September, but [...]
Bob Barr looks like Reverend Jeremiah Wright and will probably cost John McCain the election, and for these two reasons alone Barack Obama makes love to Bob Barr’s voodoo doll in his hyperbaric Hope chamber every night. You see, 6% of Zogby poll respondents said they would vote for the Libertarian candidate for president, and [...]
Proving that Obama’s 15-point lead in last week’s Newsweek poll was a liberal hoax, a hot new LA Times poll has Obama’s lead diminishing to a statistically insignificant 12 points, or 15 if you include fictional losers Bob Barr and Ralph Nader. Also, among voters who said they’d vote for McCain, only 45% are “enthusiastic” [...]
Just when you think nothing can top the antics of Paultards and Hilltardz, the Naderites of Elections Past are back to show you how it’s done. Despite being completely ignored by all media, Ralph Nader gets 6% of the vote in a new CNN poll. WTF?
Bob Barr Running For Libertarian President; Paultards Plan St. Paul Siege
by Ken Layne 12:35 pm May 12, 2008
