Big news on the Internet! The anonymous PSEUDOnymous blogger “publius” of Obsidian Wings, who has been blogging under that name since forever, is, in real, human life, some law professor in South Texas named John Blevins. Has your afternoon been enriched, now that you know this fact? Then you should thank National Review’s Ed Whelan, who “outed” Blevins because Blevins had been calling all of his writing miserable and pathetic and wrong about everything, which it is. MORE »

Madame regina St. Peggintonia Noonanshire of the Wall Street Journal banking pamphlet guest-hosted a special version of Mornington Joeington today, and one of the topics was the Death of Newspapers and Journalism. In this snippetington, she interrupts a polite conversation between Mika and Arianna to declare an Official Sadness over how, in the future times, our greatest newspapers will not be able to afford sending a single reporter “undercover” to Newark, New Jersey for five months. “Oh well.” Then she calls everyone who does anything on the Internet an idiot, especially in San Diego. Just a very rude woman sometimes, Peggington is. [MSNBC]

Michael Goldfarb likes to say swear words, and he was John McCain’s chief blogger for a while. Like every former campaign staffer, he believes “mistakes were made” during McCain’s 2008 presidential run, but can’t name any except the one where the candidate refused to talk about Reverend Wright for fear of looking like a racist. That’s why Goldfarb couldn’t call Wright an anti-Semite in that embarrassing interview with Rick Sanchez! “I thought from the beginning that we would lose,” he says. That’s the spirit! [Columbia Journalism Review]

Terminally unemployed Meghan McCain made a name for herself by typing a very weird, very revealing warblog during her dad’s tragicomic campaign. The only real “news” she broke was by posting a home video of John McCain’s special BBQ love fest for his supporters, the national political press, at one of his estates in Arizona. The American media was always there for McCain, bringing him donuts and laughing at his gorilla-rape jokes, because he made them feel good. So, obviously, Meghan is so furious about that mean old pro-Obama press who stole the election from the Real American. MORE »

You may all remember Robert Draper for his insanely long NYT article about the reverse-cowgirl firing squad that is the McCain campaign, or that book he wrote a couple years ago about George Bush being a turd. Whatever. There is news! He is a blogger now! And his blog has even more fantastical goodies about how John McCain has forced Sarah Palin to ride on the roof of the Straight Talk Express along with Mitt Romney’s dog. MORE »

Our favorite blog about nothing that we never read written by a 23-year-old unemployed airhead, Meghan McCain’s “McCain Bloggette,” is now the author of a children’s book about John McCain dropping bombs on children in Vietnam. Meghan signed copies of this book at some event we were NOT invited to, yesterday, at the RNC, and she tells People magazine that she’s super happy about her parents’ very slim chances of winning the White House, so she can move into Jenna Bush’s old room at the White House. [PEOPLE]

Here is John McCain lamenting the Information Age in typical hilarious old-man fashion. First there are “the cables,” and then talk radio, and of course bloggers, whom he hates. Finally, something we can all agree on. [YouTube via BuzzFeed]

• D.C. BLOGGER SHOT: Media Consortium reporter Brian Beutler was gunned down in Adams Morgan “pretty much directly in front of Andrew Sullivan’s apartment.” Beutler and a buddy were walking from the Black Cat to The Diner late Tuesday night when two teen-age gangsters tried to mug them, and Beutler was shot at least once. He’s in the hospital, his spleen was removed, and he’s supposed to make a full recovery. Beutler’s been reporting on U.S. torture and the ongoing FISA outrage. [DCist/Reason/Gawker]

OH GOD: “Republican John McCain’s campaign has begun holding regular conference calls with leftwing bloggers and blogs that focus on single issues such as healthcare and the environment.” Hey, do we get a call, or have all the references to Cindy McCain being a pill-popper and John McCain being the Antichrist kind of nixed that? Give us a call, WALLLLLLNUTS! [Newsmax]

Christ, the Pennsylvania primary isn’t until April 22 and at its current rate, the Internet will have long since committed suicide, over and over and over again. Over the last week, many bloggers have gotten so bored with the lack of actual news that they have become werewolves. Specifically, the level of violent rage directed at Hillary Clinton has reached that of Osama bin Laden in late 2001. Do not be surprised to see some of the bloggers below resort to self-immolation the next time Hillary Clinton says something on a radio show. MORE »

Given the Main Stream Media’s overt bias against Hillary Clinton, it’s very difficult to find a good, objective debate verdict the morning after. Fortunately we have bloggers like Andrew Sullivan to tell it like it is. While Sullivan writes dozens of posts a day, since forever, preaching against Hillary Clinton’s very Clintonian smear campaigns, diabolical nature and disgrace to the female gender and America, he actually apologized for his previous Iraq War support. Now that we can trust everything he says, let’s check out his liveblog of the debate last night to see, objectively, who won. MORE »