Tag: blacks

Donald Trump’s Mouthbreathing Supporters Will Burn This Mofo DOWN!

When Donald Trump sends his rage-fueled idiot-ass supporters to the Republican National Convention, he's not sending the best America has to offer. He's sending bitter, dumbass white people who are convinced they're only dead-end losers because The Blacks and The Mexicans took something...
He's kind of a pussy.

Another Dude Gets Punched At Trump Rally Because That’s What Happens Now

Ho-hum. Another day in Donald Trump's America, which will be great again once we have sucker-punched or deported or built a wall around allllllllll the people we don't like. Or maybe worse. Nahhhhh, Donald Trump would never rally his supporters...
PRETTY MUCH.

Fox News: Barack Obama Wants To Unpoison Flint’s Water Because He Is Racist, Q.E.D.

Damn those people in Flint, Michigan, with their fake poisoned water and their evil master plans to get more of The Blacks to vote for Democrats! What? You didn't know? Let's catch you up on what's going on in...
The secret is that Nancy Drew was a black lady all along!

Angry Wingnut Angrily Explains Nancy Drew Is A White Lady, Dammit

Here's what we remember about the Nancy Drew books our mom gave us: Nancy Drew was a girl who was a detective, and she solved mysteries. The Hardy Boys did something similar, whilst being in possession of penis parts...
The fuck is the man in front of me saying?

Michigan Republican Sad He Can’t Fix The Blacks, Stop Calling Him Racist

Here is a nice state senator Wonket has never met before! His name is Marty Knollenberg (R-Surprise!), he's a Virgo, he likes long walks on Lake Michigan (probably), and he's real sad about how he can't unblack The Blacks. Here...
Well this sure is upsetting, no it's not.

Rand Paul Pretty Sure Gays Can Just Go Do Hair If They Get Fired From Their Jobs

Rand Paul is still laboring under the delusion that he is running for president -- did you see the "dumbass" livestream of his campaign day? Didn't think so. Stumping at Drake University on Wednesday, he laid down some of that...
Fuck that dumb flag.

Confederate Flag-Humpers Indicted Just For Threatening To Kill Black Children

We can only imagine, as a verified Southern, what it must feel like to be a really shitty, confederate flag-loving moron who can't even manage to finish rubbing his privates against the trailer park's communal sex goat before he hears...
Totally not racist.

Alabama Finds New Clever Way To Show The Blacks How Much They Care

Remember that Supreme Court case Shelby County v. Holder, in which the court decided that America had totally gotten over racism and therefore there was no longer a need for racist states like Alabama and Mississippi and Tennessee and Arkansas...
It was right there on his hand the whole time.

Jeb Bush Becomes Black Voter

Oh Jebbers McJebberton Bush, you are just all over the place! You were a Hispanic voter, but then you distanced yourself from that and did whiteness again, and then you and your Mexican wife, Columba, rolled out a new Latino...
Yeah, those are totally the same.

Oppressed Wingnuts: Please Stop Lynching Us With Gay Rainbow Flag!

The Confederate "Rebel" flag has stood as a symbol, for decades upon decades, of black people being enslaved, oppressed under Jim Crow laws, being LYNCHED simply for who they are. The rainbow gay pride flag is a pretty rainbow...
The cats are cuter than anything you'll read in this post.

How Are White Wingnuts Fixing The Blacks Of Baltimore This Week?

Ever since the alleged police murder of Freddie Gray and the rioting that followed, white wingnuts have been trying SO HARD to do something -- anything! -- to help the poor black communities of Baltimore recover and move on...
Yes, kiddo, it is.

Lawsuit Alleges Nice California Teacher Taught Students About Racism, By Being Racist

Racial transcendence is alive and well in Brentwood, California, if the allegations in a new lawsuit are true. The case states that Steven Carnine, an 8th grade history teacher at Paul Revere Charter Middle School and Magnet Center, figured that...
Goodnight Sweet Dunce

Ira Hansen, Your New Favorite Nevada Wingnut, Already Calls It Quits

Just after we proclaimed him our favorite new wingnut and looked forward to a 2015 full of brilliantly idiotic quotes and policy positions, Nevada state assemblyman Ira Hansen has announced that he will not become Speaker of the Nevada...

Incoming Nevada Speaker Ira Hansen Is Your New Favorite Wingnut

Listen: Nevada Republicans are not interested in your "bipartisanship" or your "getting along" or your "logic and facts." As soon as they took over the state House, they chose as their new Speaker one Ira Hansen, a gentleman who,...

Mitt Romney Acknowledges He Did Not ‘Speak Openly And Effectively To Minority Populations,’ Fails To Note Wetness Of Water

Average guy Mitt Romney and his wife Egg went on the CBS This Morning teevee Showcase of Disgrace to talk about why he lost so badly in the last “America’s Next Top Figurehead” contest. Oddly, he said a thing...

Black Guy Writes Pretty Awesome Letter About Jews

Thomas Lopez-Pierre, who is running for the New York City Council, has done wrote a doozy of a letter about how he loves boning Jewesses (he doesn't say so, but it is totally because we got boobs), and once...