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Posts Tagged ‘bill richardson’

James ‘Judas’ Carville Says Obama Is Likely Nominee

Tuesday, May 13th, 2008

I want me some crawdadsWeird old Cajun swamp weasel James Carville called Bill Richardson and said he wanted his thirty pieces of silver back. Then a chicken made a sound three times and Carville was like, “Hillary who?” in an alarming visit to Furman University in Greenville, South Carolina, in which he said all sorts of damning things about his former friend Senator Hillary Clinton. MORE »


Carville And Richardson Continue To Slap Each Other With Various Words

Thursday, April 24th, 2008

Priggish Acadian fur-trader James Carville appeared on Larry King Live last night with his mortal enemy, fat Mexican ex-presidential candidate Bill Richardson, to Assess the Race. Carville had famously called Richardson “Judas Iscariot” after the latter endorsed Barack Obama, because Bill Clinton gave Richardson two or three of his 80,000 stupid jobs in the 1990s and now he won’t even support the damn wife’s campaign. The two continued fighting each other last night, most notably when Carville makes fun of Richardson’s tropical beach vacation. Video after the jump. MORE »


Meet The Clintons’ 7 Most Despised Former Friends!

Monday, April 21st, 2008

Reviewing the listThe Clintons have been in politics for so long that even their shit list has a shit list. And that exclusive Who’s Who of former friends has only grown as this soul-deadening primary season drags its festering carcass ever closer to the finish line (sometime next year, we think?). Let’s review the top seven lucky people who won’t be getting Christmas cards from Bill and Hillary this year, unless those Christmas cards are stuffed with anthrax. MORE »


Bill Clinton Goes Crazy With Superdelegates Watching

Wednesday, April 2nd, 2008

At this weekend’s California Democratic convention, Bill Clinton met privately with some superdelegates from the state. He was charming until someone mentioned Bill Richardson, and then he started yelling at himself, or them, or someone. He was yelling at someone, yes: “The former president then went on a tirade that ran from the media’s unfair treatment of Hillary to questions about the fairness of the votes in state caucuses that voted for Obama. It ended with him asking delegates to imagine what the reaction would be if Obama was trailing by just 1 percent and people were telling him to drop out.” April Fool’s! Bill Clinton is actually dead. [SF Chronicle] MORE »


I’m Swell, My Opponent Is A Necrophiliac/Hobo/Graceful Figure Skater

Friday, March 28th, 2008

Hey, did you know that it’s only March? That’s right, you have another seven months of this stupid election to endure. Since it’s already gone on for eleventy billion months already, everything of remote substance has already been hashed out and forgotten, so now all we have time for are the wild accusations. And everyone knows wild accusations are more fun in cartoon form! MORE »


Bill Richardson Should Have Grown Dali Mustache Instead

Tuesday, March 25th, 2008


Is Bill Richardson’s beard catering to Ethnocentric Special Interests, and if so, why did he not just grow a sombrero instead? And what about that tan? Is that more Hispanic pandering, or is it because he just went on vacation? Remember Al Gore’s beard? Man, that was great. George Lucas also has a neck beard. This is a summary of the very sober conversation these professional members of the Fourth Estate had on Fox News yesterday. [Media Matters]


Tuesday, March 25th, 2008

LOU DOBBS IS A REAL CHARACTER, REAL CLASSY GUY: Well glory be, one of the Media Matters press releases has a funny in it! Here’s CNN host Lou Dobbs opening his show on March 21: “Tonight, Senator Obama wins the endorsement of the nation’s only Hispanic governor, Bill Richardson. Is Obama pandering to ethnocentric special interests again? We’ll have complete coverage.” Barack Obama has yet to denounce the Hispanic race, because that would be like denouncing his uncle. [Media Matters]


Jesus Christ And Joe McCarthy Battle For ‘Most Egregious Rhetorical Cudgel’ Honors

Monday, March 24th, 2008

Bachelor #1 has better hair
Yes, unofficial Clinton advisor James Carville really did suggest Hillary was Jesus. Bill Richardson’s endorsement of Barack Obama “came right around the anniversary of the day when Judas sold out for 30 pieces of silver, so I think the timing is appropriate, if ironic,” Carville said on Friday, and then an Obama guy said Bill Clinton engaged in “McCarthyite” campaign tactics, and Hitler was sad because he felt left out. [NYT, MSNBC]


Friday, March 21st, 2008

MARK PENN BEATS RICHARDSON IN SUMO MATCH: And now the traditional Fun Part of the News Day: how did Clinton chief strategist Mark “Bowser” Penn manage to spin away Obama’s latest good news (the Richardson endorsement)? We predicted the standard “caucus states don’t matter” line, which was close enough to the truth: “The time that he could have been effective has long since passed… I don’t think it is a significant endorsement in this environment.” For real — what good is an endorsement when Hillary’s already won the presidency? [TPM Election Central]


Bill Richardson Needs Directions For Living

Friday, March 21st, 2008

Hmm, do you catch any trace of a smile on Bill Richardson’s face in this photo? Barack clearly doesn’t want to shake his hand — he doesn’t know what kind of Tijuana hellholes that burly paw has been in. At some point in Richardson’s endorsement speech, however, he was supposed to turn towards Obama and smile. We know this because the Obama campaign gave out copies of Richardson’s speech to the press, but forgot to delete this stage direction: “[Turn toward Obama and smile].” Richardsonbot, fail. MORE »