“A Scuffle Ensued And He Ate My Finger In The Process”: The Nine-Fingered Man Answers Your Burning Questions
Friday, September 4th, 2009
FOX News tracked down Bill Rice, some guy who up until yesterday had ten fingers and now he does not, all thanks to the public option. As it turns out, we all dodged a bullet with this guy who could, if he so desired, easily, easily stand to gain from this whole ordeal a reality show, a 15,000 profile in Vanity Fair (as told to Willow Palin and William Langewiesche), and the VP slot on the 2012 GOP ticket. Plus, BONUS common decency cred for telling the FOX anchor that having your hand eaten doesn’t make you a hero, it makes you a highly medicated guy with nine fingers. MORE »










