bill of rights

Were you wondering who the people facing the most difficulty in America are today? Is it the homeless or critically ill people with no healthcare? Haha of course not. It is tech bros who aren’t getting enough stock options, and the time has come for them to rise up and fight for what is theirs. […]

Welcome to another edition of Derp Roundup, that weekly big ball of wadded-up idiocy from our inbox that was too stoopid to ignore altogether, but that didn’t quite merit a full-length Wonket post. Up first, a quick visit to that land of fiscal restraint, North Carolina, where Gov. Pat McCrory presided over a 2013 legislative […]

You might think that our Christianist textbooks would have the decency to mention this true historical event where Jesus handed the Constitution to America’s children while Washington, Lincoln, Adams and Hamilton sang show tunes, but this basic fact is strangely absent from the two textbooks we’ve been reviewing. They don’t even argue that the Constitution […]

We were really hoping, in light of the Supreme Court going all gay yesterday, that we’d hear from the O.G Culture Scold herself, Phyllis Schlafly. Who better than Schlafly to bust out a nice little homophobic rant after that decision? Alas, ’tis not to be, probably because Schlafly is super-busy of late because she’s taken […]

Are little Jimmy and Janie coming home from school with a bunch of godless socialist ideas about “redistributing toys to other kids who haven’t had a turn” and “waiting in communist bread lines to go out to recess?” ┬áIf you are worried this kind of Soviet indoctrination is taking hold of your youngster in our […]

Fiercely independent Connecticut Senator and five-time Worst Human Of The Year Award winner Joe Lieberman finds it pretty frustrating when swarthy, sinister terrorists are picked up by FBI “courtesy patrols” and whisked off to a day spa for mud wraps and reiki work just because they managed to bamboozle some activist judge into making them […]