Wednesday, September 30: DC lost our bid for the gay Olympics, but we still have Fairy Fingers– homemade marshmallows dipped in chocolate– and you can eat them for FREE at ACKC tonight from 6:00PM- 8:30PM. [ACKC] MORE »

Bethesda/Chevy Chase’s restaurant week begins today, HOORAY! Bethesda pretty much sucks, but they are trying. MORE »

• Hooray, the demon water main that plagued Bethesda with rapids of inconvenience has been fixed. It is hilariously located on River Road, which is also now re-opened. [DC Examiner]
• More tragic news of journalism layoffs: The “U” has been fired from the sign atop the USA Today building. It will now blog for the Daily Beast.   [Fishbowl DC]
• There’s been an increase in juvenile DC murderers this year, some as young as 16. But are they killing at a tenth-grade level? [Washington Post]
• Nine MUSLIMS were removed from a flight to MUSLIM-dominated Florida out of National after some passengers heard them talking about airplanes, a highly suspicious, Muslim-y thing to do while on board an airplane. [WTOP]
• Today is the deadline to apply for a prime spot as a member of Obama’s Inauguration team. You will be paid with a “commemorative volunteer credential,” which will soon out-value United States currency. [DCist]

It’s still “Oktober,” according to the German lunar calendar. Hooray! At one “Oktoberfest,” the Teutonic Gods are giving away ancient beer tickets, and all you have do to is dress like a German. It’s so easy — actual Germans do it all the time! Just make sure if you go retro and dress as a Nazi you know what you’re getting yourself into! (It’s Poland.) MORE »

* Reliable Source: Paramount Pictures buys the distribution rights for Al Gore’s environmental film. . . New Armani model is Bethesda native: “I’ve sort of branded myself as an intelligent guy. I would make a lot more money if I shut up and pretended to be dumb.”. . . John Hinckley’s girlfriend has been working as an inspector for the D.C. Department of Mental Health. [WP]
* Under the Dome: George Lucas will publicly voice support for Rep. Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) today. [The Hill]
* Inside the Beltway: Rep. Tom DeLay (R-Texas): “The reports of my demise have been greatly exaggerated. I’m still very much alive.” [WT]
* The Scoop: PETA recommends that Cheney play tennis rather than hunt: “I hope that the man you mistook for a quail is doing well. I also hope that this brush with tragedy will convince you to rethink your recreational activities.” [MSNBC]