Here is your annual bit of foreign news from the foreign country of France! France’s “President”—think: the equivalent of America’s “minority whip”—Nicolas Sarkozy posted a Facebook photo on his French Facebook in which he is shown personally destroying the Berlin Wall with a Nicolas Sarkozy-sized ax. Except according to historical evidence dating back to November 9th, 1989 A.D., Sarkozy was actually in Paris at the time. According to European-style geography, it would have been impossible for Sarkozy to be both in Paris and also knocking down the Berlin Wall, located in Berlin. MORE »

• Two completely random European journalists are requesting credit for the fall of the Berlin Wall. See, they were the ones who asked tuff questions about it! No one had even THOUGHT about knocking it down—that is, before the quality of their journalism alluded to it. [WSJ]
• Actual winner of Afghanistan’s election, Abdullah Abduallah, might team up with Hamid Karzai in some sort of coalition of convenience, thus rendering a run-off election unnecessary. [New York Times]
• The latest iteration of the Democrats’ fantasy health care bill is $871 billion. Everyone will automatically love it because of how under Obama’s limit of $900 billion it is. [Washington Post]
• Apple has signaled it’s time for you to get a new computer by designing a much, much cooler-looking laptop than than the one you currently have. [CNN]
• Good—eh, well, relatively goodish—news for widow(er)s: Congress passed this new bill that eliminated the two-year marriage minimum of green card eligibility. [Los Angeles Times]
• Obama demanded that Big Finance JUST DEAL WITH his proposed banking regulations. He said this at a $15,000-a-plate DNC fundraiser at the Mandarin Oriental Hotel in Manhattan. [The Hill]

• Obama, to prove he does not hate New Orleans and has zero plans to willfully destroy it—as per the tradition of his predecessor—will visit this afternoon. [Los Angeles Times]
• Over 30 people were killed in a series of coordinated terrorist goings-on in Islamabad. [New York Times]
• The Arctic’s ice will be completely gone in 20 years. Add “carbon emissions” to “rock salt” on the national What Melts Snow list. [Times Online]
• Obama wants to give $250 to every senior and disabled person this winter, since there will not be the traditional increase on Social Security benefit checks. [Washington Post]
• Probationary Kennedy Maria Shriver has apologized for talking on her cell phone while driving, for such is illegal in California. This is like literally the third time this has happened. [CNN]
• Uhh… the Germans are constructing a new Berlin Wall, out of Styrofoam… because they want to knock it down again. Ha ha.  It seems this is how most things start, in Germany. [WSJ]