Wonkette

Hmm so yes, this is what it’s come to: our national financial crisis was predicted by a comic book movie about a villain with a lumpy white sliced-up face. This mashup of George Bush’s sad address from last night and Heath Ledger’s bravura performance as an insane person with drymouth is dreadfully offensive to the beautiful legacy of The Joker, who would have suspended the filming of his movie in order to tend to the nation’s business in Washington DC. Also why isn’t Sarah Palin running around in a neoprene cat suit listing the regulatory accomplishments of her running mate? Fail. [YouTube]

COMMENT OF THE DAY: “I remember when Batman told everyone to go shopping and to fly more to fight the Joker. Also, when he gave up golf for a few weeks. That was so brave to do, in this time of terror and war.” [George W. Bush Is Exactly Like Batman]

Have you seen the new movie about The Batman? If so, you know what everybody is talking about: How dead Heath Ledger is super awesome as the crazy-ass Joker terrorist. How the idiot George W. Bush is exactly like the heroic Englishman, The Batman. “There seems to me no question that the Batman film The Dark Knight, currently breaking every box office record in history, is at some level a paean of praise to the fortitude and moral courage that has been shown by George W. Bush in this time of terror and war,” writes some dingbat on the Wall Street Journal op-ed page today. Yep, no question at all. [Wall Street Journal]

By the Comics Curmudgeon

Say, have you heard that all boundaries between high and low art have been blurred? It’s true, supposedly! That’s why comic books written for socially maladjusted children are now being turned into critic-friendly movies, and famous paintings are being transformed into dopey kitsch. Is there any kind of art that it’s still legitimate to mock and deride? Why, political cartoons, of course! Join in the hate, after the jump. MORE »

Did you spend double-digit money this weekend to see the Most Important Film Of Our Time, Batman Vs. The Dead Gay Cowboy Clown? YEAH YOU DID BECAUSE YOU LIKE HIGH ART. As we’ve mentioned previously, the dead Joker harasses Sen. Patrick Leahy at some fancy Washington cocktail party (Capitol File?) in this Work of Deep Brilliant Cinema, which is based on a comic book for children. And because Pat Leahy is a whore in real life, he has written a review of the film for known modernist film trade publication The Hill. It is an exciting review which you can read in its entirety after the jump. MORE »

What motivates Senator Patrick Leahy? Money? Sex? Sex for money? Public service or whatever? No. No. No. It is Batman, and only the Batman, that gives Pat Leahy the will to live, in Washington. He was briefly seen (but not heard) in the Batman and Robin movie of a few years ago — the one with George Clooney’s chilly nipples. And last August, we reported that Leahy was set for a speaking role in The Dark Knight. See the exclusive & terrifying video, after the jump. MORE »

“Hobnobbing with crooks!” This debate will happen in Kentucky, at the cable access station behind the moonshine mill, moderated by John Edwards disguised as Charlie Gibson. Also, this is from the highly anticipated new “Brokeback Batman” movie, the end. [YouTube]

The grand mystery of Eliot Spitzer’s comically hypocritical whoring is what exactly was being discussed when classy hooker “Kristen” was told by her madam that Spitzer “would ask you to do things that, like, you might not think were safe ….” Although we remain hopeful that it was something really weird and dangerous, possibly involving a trapeze and a velvet hovercraft, the consensus seems to be “He didn’t want to wear a condom.” But why are they speaking to each other in such stilted circumlocutions? We could make up a whole list of similarly pointlessly roundabout talk at the super-premium Brothel of Ambiguity. Let’s do it! MORE »

Having spent the past year throwing comical questions at Alberto Gonzales and all his sexy Christian super-villain ladies, Senate Judiciary Chairman Pat Leahy is now returning to his first love: performing in Batman movies. But what role will Leahy fill in the new caped crusader movie? MORE »

* Rudy G. thinks strong early poll numbers mean he gets to play Ronald Reagan. [Captain's Quarters]
* Walnuts McCain deletes his MySpace page, wants to focus on meeting friends IRL. [techPresident]
* Carl “the contrarian” Levin just wants to invade Syria cause everyone else wants Iran. [QandO]
* Bono likes Obama — surprise fucking surprise. [Shenanigans]
* Turning an MS Office document into a .pdf can turn you from a broke cube-jockey to a baller. [Swampland]
* Do explosions in the night make Dick Cheney wet himself, or just wet? [Rude Pundit]
* Lieberman gets lucky, Politico gets sloppy. [Horse's Mouth]
* Drop fifty-grand on a cause as worthy as smearing John Kerry and all you get is a lousy ambassadorship to Belgium. [HuffPo]

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We’d like to put forth the hypothesis that dissident Kremlin critic Alexander Litvinenko was poisoned not by the FSB/KGB, but by Russia’s other secret intelligence organization, the Main Intelligence Directorate (or GRU). MORE »

Looks like we’ll be wrapping up this Global Struggle Against Violent Extremism pretty dang quickly. MORE »