Wednesday, April 29: For those of you who weren’t able to get a free cone from Ben and Jerry’s last week (damn long lines), Baskin Robbins is giving you the opportunity to have almost free ice cream: tonight you can enjoy a small scoop of any flavor for just 31 cents and the proceeds go to firefighters. MORE »

Poor old John McCain can’t even win a stupid ice cream contest. Wonkette Operative David sends us this sad report: “Apparently, Baskin-Robbins has been holding a national Flavor Election, which is kind of like an election where only fat, diabetics can vote (Kinda like the real election?). Anywho, the not only did Obama’s Whirl of Change trounce The Straight Talk Crunch in national polls — ice cream is in the tank — but it seems like nobody is fucking eating McCain’s horrible Ice Cream. … Even the french vanilla with egg yolk got more love (yuk).”