baseball

Sometimes, the level of douchenozzle that comes with being a sportsball sportscaster guy is breathtaking. Take WFAN’s Mike Francesa, who is the maddest of all that baseball-flavored sportsball player Daniel Murphy, who plays for the New York Mets, got a whopping TWO GAMES OFF because his wife had a baby. OUTFUCKINGRAGEOUS. Everybody knows that real […]

Are you ready for some baseball? Opening Day is upon us, which means the Gray Lady, the Paper of Record, will spend the next six months recording every up and down (mostly down) in the annual tatbir undertaken by Yankees and Mets fans. On Opening Day, though, hope springs eternal, even in the Bronx and […]

George Will, the Washington Post’s moderately somnolent Guy Who Watches Baseball And Reads Thesauruses, has decided that the story of Frank Robinson is the perfect one to explain the presidential election. Obama‚Äôs administration is in shambles, yet he is prospering politically. This may not, however, entirely be evidence of the irrationality of the electorate. Something […]

Who could forget the magical year 1999? Bill Clinton proved that it was Constitutional for the president to get a blowjob from a lady to whom he was not married, the stock market was on a nonstop rocket ride to the moon thanks to the new-fangled Internet, and Atlanta Braves relief pitcher John Rocker was […]

Whoever the Daily Caller’s managing editor is, probably “Cactus Joe” or some such, made a pretty amateurish pacing error today. Trolling the president with a dumb question and then lying about it is great “content,” yes, but not if you run it on the same day that you’re running the most profound insight into political […]

At Red Sox game, President Obama comes on big screen to recognize Fenway’s 100th anniversary, followed by loud chorus of boos. — Eric Fehrnstrom (@EricFehrn) April 20, 2012 Via email, from the Red Sox game: “[Pres Obama] just came on the Jumbotron with a birthday message for Fenway and was booed. Loudly” — Jeff Emanuel […]

Rick Santorum has chosen a new strategy in his quest to win the Republican presidential nomination that he cannot mathematically win: Talkin’ sports. You know, shootin’ the shit with his buddies, the voters, about golf, baseball, bowling. Shooting guns. Those sports. He’s very good at them all, just like Vladimir Putin is at fucking tigers […]

What’s that dang old George W. Bush up to these days? People used to talk about him all the time. Now? It’s like we can’t even remember what the deal was, with that guy. The main thing is that he is very scared of flying baseballs and scary baseball catcher-men. We would be scared, too!

Why did Sluggo quit baseball? Who didn’t shut it down? Why is there so much crack in Cairo? These are the stories making news at 3 a.m. in Washington D.C. and midnight somewhere else, maybe the West Coast.

Baltimore Orioles outfielder Luke Scott went into Major League Baseball’s offseason winter meetings with a .902 OPS on the year and, it turns out, a deep distrust of that Kenyan socialist Barack Obama. “He was not born here,” said the man best known for hitting a leather-wrapped ball of cork and wool, not so much […]

Yes, be FURIOUS. Barack Obama is not even a little bit busy today. He is probably just blowing bubbles in the Rose Garden or maybe looking for animal shapes in the clouds.

In 2008, the Committee on Oversight and Government Reform decided it would grandstand on the use of steroids in baseball, because what else were they going to do? Their jobs? (NO.) So this was a little circus for a while, and they subpoenaed famous baseball players to these hearings so that said members of Congress […]

New York Yankees owner Geroge Steinbrenner keeled over and died of a heart attack this morning to the amusement of baseball fans everywhere. He was 80 in terms of human-years and is best remembered for breaking the hearts of children across the country for decades by taking their favorite players and giving them ridiculous amounts […]

In 2004, when “the Internets” was a fresh joke reference, Democratic presidential nominee John Kerry amassed an e-mail list of millions of people. He still has this list, so occasionally he sends messages to people’s old work e-mail accounts and junk AOL addresses. And perhaps to a few people who still use their 2004 address […]

Last night was the much anticipated Roll Call Congressional Baseball Game and somehow your Wonkabout convinced our dearly departed editor Jim Newell to join her for the adventure. New editor Jack refused to leave his home, cats and whatever, and missed the annual Wonkette field trip. At the Big Game Republicans and Democrats showed off […]