Wonkette

ABC News Senior National Correspondent Jake Tapper was on to Barack Obama’s resurgent smoking habit months ago, but the Obama campaign covered for the ever-more-desperate candidate as he wove a web of deception that eventually ensnared the nation in cancer and betrayal. Way back in August Obama was wandering around the Capitol reeking of smoke, and what did Obama’s people say when Concerned Jake asked about it? MORE »

Tonight we’ve got BREAKING news that St. Barack of Obama “fell off the wagon a few times” since he quit the cigarettes a year ago. This means he still has some “regular human” genes and that Hillary is sure to announce that she has started smoking weed again, at 3 a.m. MORE »

We have always hated “Obama Girl,” just as our St. Barack of Obama hates “Obama Girl,” and for the same reasons: Everything dumb and and vapid and vulgar and plastic about this failed nation is personified by this “Obama Girl.” But the lyrics to this latest piece of crap are at least accurate — and subtitled, so you can figure out what mush mouth is saying. Hillary really does seem to want to be under John McCain’s desk in the Oval Office. [Barely Political]

Hello and Happy Christmas of probably 1988, [December 1989, try reading the caption -- Ed.] Barry and Michelle! You both look great! Well, not really, but you look better than so many other 1980s disasters such as albino hair-metal twins Nelson, mullet-lunk Billy Ray Cyrus or whatever was going on with Tracy Chapman.

BARACK OBAMA: HE’S JUST LIKE US [US Weekly]

THEY’RE ALL IN ON THE OBAMA SMEAR! Teevee’s Jon Stewart hosted the Oscar(TM) Teevee/Movie Awards last night, and he mentioned that Barry Hussein Obama’s middle name is “Hussein” while also noting how “Obama” rhymes with “Osama.” It was just a fun joke, of course! [Tabloid Baby]

Hillary Clinton continues to suggest her rival Barack Obama is too stylish, and also he is a thiever of words and slippery when it comes to campaign finances. In other words, he is a “politician.” Hillary Clinton finds this repellent and disappointing, and wants voters to know it. MORE »

Charles Krauthammer is not having any of this creepy cultish Obama nonsense. In his new column, “Obama Casts His Spell” (that is the real headline), the Washington Post blowhard says he’s the only wrong-about-everything right-wing realist who can escape the bewitching African charms of this Democratic presidential “hopeful.” That means, somehow, that Barack Obama will “charm” his way into power. And then oh my god exactly 24 hours after President Hussein Obama is sworn in …. MORE »

Barack Obama won another big primary day! He got enough of the votes and the delegates and the white people and the liberal women to wipe out Hillary Clinton. (YES THE BLACKS ALSO VOTED FOR HIM. STOP PLAYING THE RACE CARD.) So now we go to, er, Wisconsin? And then Texas, and Ohio, and Hawaii?