Wonkette

This week, Barney Frank, Bob Allen, Ken Mehlman, Ben Stein, Maria Bartiromo and Robert Novak were all spotted being various degrees of famous at various places by our spies and operatives. Voyeuristic fun, as always, is after the jump.

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Here’s some fun video from last year, with designated “out” Congressman Barney Frank not really answering Bill Maher’s question about Larry Craig being a queer. It’s still worthwhile for Frank’s in-general response to why it matters that all the Republican politicians are sucking dick in every filthy public bathroom — because these are the same people who want to make homosexuality illegal.

Barney and Bill on Larry Craig and gay Republicans [YouTube]

Poor Barney Frank has been walking around with his arm in a sling. In order to cut off the constant questions and maddening sympathy from people he so obviously hates, his office sent this email to most of Capitol Hill: MORE »

* President Bush to launch new “surge” in war on Mexicans. [WP, USAT]
* Barney Frank wants the government to get back to building low-income housing so all the poor people will be in one place. [WP]
* Hurricane Katrina related claims against the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers reach $477 billion. [USAT]
* Democrats propose tax cuts for the rich! [NYT]
* Fred Thompson may be a little behind in fundraising for ‘08, but do any of the other candidates have a star vehicle like Bury My Heart At Wounded Knee in which they play President Ulysses “The Alcoholic One” Grant? [WSJ]
* Newt Gingrich blames Alberto Gonzales for Alberto Gonzales’ problems. [NYT, LAT]
* Bloggers get John McCain to admit to strolling around Baghdad with a platoon of his closest heavily armed friends. [NYT]
* Drunk with power and in search of an identity, Joe Lieberman makes a seating chart. [WP]
* Country not ready to learn the porn-surfing habits of White House staffers. [LAT]

Behold Harriet Miers, far from Dorothy, Rose, and Sofia, yet smirking all the way to the hearing room. She’s in today’s Wonk’d, along with Mark Foley in the role of the sassy friend with all the best zingers and Barney Frank playing the lovable dummy. Make the jump for these golden girls, plus Rick Santorum as the hateable dummy, Jesse Jackson, Jr. as “the black one,” and one very hungry Stephanie Herseth.

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* Heard on the Hill: Richard Simmons was at the Capitol “spreading joy.” … No more stache for Rep. Peter DeFazio — who will keep the flame alive now? … Congressional Record claims John McCain introduced an amendment in the House. Madness! … Barney Frank doesn’t care if the Republicans obstruct the Dems, he just wishes they weren’t so boring about it. [Roll Call]
* Reliable Source: Local boy makes good! [WP]
* Yeas and Nays: Donald Rumsfeld still alive, hanging out at the Hoover Institution. John Fund got his digits! “Not for an interview, just to talk.” We did not make that quote up… Joe and Valerie Wilson are gone, forever. [Examiner]
* The Sleuth: Bush hosts coffee date for neocons… Vanessa Williams and Dick Durbin: BFF! [WP]
* Shenanigans: Ted Kennedy had yet another birthday party. Everyone was there! … Happy CPAC weekend! … John Edwards: Lying about his favorite movie? [Politico]

* If Hieronymus Bosch had Photoshop he’d kick all these whipper-snappers’ asses. [The Art Directors Club]
* Robert Gates admits what Rumsfeld never could: “I’m no expert on military matters.” [CBS News]
* Barney Frank bangs his gavel 10, maybe 20 times a day. [C&L]
* Barbara Boxer cunt-punches Condi. [Passport]
* New Trump Tower Tehran would be gorgeous, baby, just gorgeous. [Think Progress]
* Dennis Kucinich’s music video takes patience, oooooh yeah, just a little patience. [Washington Wire]

* Heard on the Hill: Rahm Emanuel puts Ken Mehlman in a “mini-bear hug,” asks what he’s doing next, says, “Banking, Ken, that’s where the money is” … Surprise entertainment at the exclusive RIAA holiday party? The Barenaked Ladies. Ok, we’re linking to so many pirated mp3s in protest now… “A revised floor schedule for Wednesday was sent out advising, “H.R. 6136 — Margaret Thatcher Congressional Gold Medal Act HAS BEEN PULLED.” Thank christ for Barny Frank. [Roll Call]
* Reliable Source: Because they live in Virginia, Mary Cheney’s partner Heather Poe will have no legal guardianship over their baby and won’t be allowed to adopt it unless they move to Maryland. [WP]
* Yeas and Nays: Official Congressional Gym very crowded these days, Democrats out of shape… Nancy Pelosi was 45 minutes late to a press briefing, more Democrats even later the next day. [Examiner]
* Under the Dome: Nancy Pelosi/Barbara Walters interview in the Capitol forces GOP staffers to wait until they pass before finishing cleaning out their bosses’ office… Santorum’s website slightly more gracious than his last speech… “Phil Olsen, the captain for Team USA in the World Beard and Moustache Championships, says [John] Bolton is welcome to a spot on the team.” [The Hill]
* Page Six: Just pure insanity re. Lindsay Lohan and Al Gore. It’s sad and crazy and makes us uncomfortable. [NYP]

We thought George Allen was the Secret Jew, but Barney Frank says the closeted GOP gays on the Hill are the real Secret Jews. Talking about the Republican staffers who engineered the Foley coverup, Frank says: “There are others who were involved that I can’t mention since they aren’t out. They are all more like secret Jews.” MORE »

• Primary results “yielded no significant surprises”; Republican Brian Bilbray beats Democrat Francine Busby in race for Rep. Randy Cunningham’s seat. [WP, LAT]
• Cheney brokers deal to keep telephone company executives from testifying about NSA database. [USAT]
• Some Republican Senators think the recent focus on “ideologically charged topics” like gay marriage could backfire; voters have more pressing concerns. Sen. Rick Santorum (R-Pa.): “I know in many meetings of our colleagues when the issue of marriage comes up, heads drop. It is just an issue that people just feel uncomfortable talking about. It’s something that maybe in some respects they feel like, why do we even have to? Why is this even an issue?” [NYT]
• Use of “taxpayer-funded databases” provides an advantage to incumbents who can “cultivate constituents more attentively than ever.” Rep. Barney Frank (D-Mass.): “As incumbents, we have unlimited access to the most up-to-date technology in the world.” [WP]
• FBI sought proof that Rep. William Jefferson may have tried to bribe the vice president of Nigeria. [NYT, LAT]
• Judiciary Panel members are riled by a Justice Department official’s refusal to say “whether the Bush administration has ever considered prosecuting journalists for publishing leaked national security information.” [WP]
• Tom DeLay says “panic, depression and woe-is-me-ism” risks losing the election for the GOP. [USAT, USAT]

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