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Posts Tagged “Barack Obama”

time to choose, kids

Rahm Emanuel Declares Obama Winner, Staffer Retroactively Undeclares That

Mean old Congressman Rahm Emanuel, speaking at the elitist New Yorker Conference today, pretty much said that Obama is the nominee. Since Rahm Emanuel is a Democratic Leader, this was big news. But since he is an undecided superdelegate who — like others — could just END THIS RACE RIGHT NOW PLEASE, he refused to do this and retracted his statement through a catty little spokesperson. More »

you can't always get what you want

Now Hillary Has Lost The Superdelegate Contest, Too

She really will continue campaigning until she actually dies, in 2027. The latest (and seemingly final) nail in the coffin of Hillary Clinton's Presidential Campaign comes from ABC News, which has done the "hard math" and confirmed that Mrs. Clinton has now also lost the superdelegate contest. Let's make a fun-filled, easy-to-read list of writing on the wall, after the jump. More »

that's not sexual orientation transcendence

Obama Indirectly Calls All Of His Supporters Gay

According to the national press corps outlet CNN, Obama not only wears jeans sometimes on his airplane, but he also plays Taboo — with them! Check out this "interesting moment" from the heat of the action: "An interesting moment came when an Obama staffer was looking at the word 'gap.' His clue: a place where gay people shop. Before the word was accurately guessed, other reporters said they heard one staffer shout the store 'H&M' and heard Obama say 'Abercrombie & Fitch.'" It is well known that Abercrombie & Fitch clothes 95% of Obama's young supporters, meaning they shop there, meaning they are gay. And that's racist. [CNN]

THREE MORE SUPERDELEGATES, PLUS A UNION ENDORSEMENT: Hopey just got a nod from the American Federation of Government Employees and picked up another three superdelegates (including a Clinton traitor). That means Obama is now five (and a half?) superdelgates shy of Hillary's total. [AP/Yahoo]

sit down, i can't see it!

BREAKING: OBAMA WEARS JEANS, TALKS ON TELEPHONE

The national press corps has found EXCLUSIVE MUST CREDIT CNN footage of Obama wearing — gasp — jeans on his airplane, while talking on the phone. Watch this inflammatory CNN video here of Obama wearing a certain type of common pants. John McCain calls them "dungarees." [CNN]

talk radio

Rush Limbaugh's Dumb Pro-Hillary Scheme Flops

Loser pill-head Rush Limbaugh has an AM radio show during the daytime. His audience of bitter old white retirees and home-appliance repairmen was instructed to go out en masse and vote for Hillary in open primaries, so that liberal Latino-American John McCain could at least have a small chance of winning in November. But it totally failed, so now Limbaugh is suddenly pretending he really wanted his listeners to vote for the black guy. More »

democratic national convention

Democratic Convention Racist For Hillary


What, the Democratic National Convention Committee couldn't find a black artist to design the credentials?

please just leave

Hillary Finally Says That White People Don't Like Obama

Hillary Clinton is the worst person on Earth by at least 90 million "terrible person" points. In an interview with USA Today, she overtly says that white people don't like Obama:

"I have a much broader base to build a winning coalition on," she said in an interview with USA TODAY. As evidence, Clinton cited an Associated Press article "that found how Sen. Obama's support among working, hard-working Americans, white Americans, is weakening again, and how whites in both states who had not completed college were supporting me."

Whatever, Goebbels. [USA Today]

nightmare scenarios

All About Obama's Greek Cannibal Foes

Harold Meyerson has lost his mind, and now he is writing insane jabber about Cronus and the swallowing of babies, and how Hillary and Bill Clinton are a two-headed Cronus while Jeremiah Wright is just a lame old one-headed Cronus. In this carefully thought-out electoral scenario, Barack Obama plays the rapist swan. [Washington Post]

sesame street

Muppets Debate Clinton vs. Obama

World-famous puppet "roommates" Bert and Ernie have a heated political discussion in which Obama emerges the victor, suggesting rumors of faltering gay support for Hillary Clinton are more than just rumors. [YouTube]

dept. of bleeding eyeballs

Dirty Photo Of Obama Groping Hillary's Nethers!


It appears "pressure" isn't the only thing mounting on Senator Clinton. Thanks to eagle-eyed reader John for spotting this on The Note before they replaced it with something a little less scandalous. [ABC News]

barack obama

Has TIME Magazine Called It For Obama?

Matt Drudge, the patron saint of political journalists looking for some link love, has this dignified "You're Done, Hillary" TIME cover, which we can only assume is either a) the next TIME cover, or b) somebody's idea of a funny thing to make Hillary cry. [DRUDGE REPORT]

NO RETREAT, BABY, NO SURRENDER: "Upon more questioning, the campaign advisers acknowledged some hard truths. Even if the Florida and Michigan delegations were seated, it would not be enough for a win. The financial health of the campaign appeared grim — Mrs. Clinton loaned herself $6 million last month, and she is prepared to donate more. And if there was good news to share about overnight on-line fund-raising totals, Mr. Wolfson did not mention it." [New York Times]

insane

Mike Gravel Courts Obama Girl


What to even say about this new Obama Girl video, where she is courted by Democratic/Libertarian presidential candidate Mike Gravel? He sings and does the Soulja Boy dance. But no cookie! [YouTube]

elite math

How Hillary Clinton Will Win The Nomination Now

So Hillary Clinton has announced that she will stay in the presidential race until there is a nominee. By most measures, there already is one, so she is stupid. But Elite Math still says that she has a chance of winning this thing, as the above scenario from CNN's thrill-a-minute delegate counter shows. In this one, she will clinch the nomination (with one extra delegate!) by winning 45% of undecided superdelegates and 100% of remaining pledged delegates. Yes She Can! What other possibilities are there for Hillary to become president, according to this fun CNN game? More »

the end is nigh

Better Start That Clinton Paraphernalia Firesale, And Soon!

Maybe you liked her once for her health care mandates, or just thought she might be the more effective manager of the federal bureaucracy? Well you don't like her anymore! Time to sell sell SELL that stuff before the market shuts down for good. [Craigslist]

squaring the circle

Obama's Joyless Math Beats Hillary's Magical Maps

Cable news anchors, you are all fired, except for Chuck Todd. You freak out for weeks about all the crazy doomsday scenarios in which Hillary Clinton might be able to WREST the nomination from Captain Hope, and finally at 2 a.m. you're like, "Oh, but the math." This is a photograph of Hillary Clinton also thinking about math. [New York Observer]

barack obama

Late Night Indiana Results Drive Everyone Crazy, But Hillary Squeaks By

YIKES OBAMA JUST GOT 28,000 INDIANA VOTES. The mysterious "Lake County" just released 20% of its votes ... and now the state total is Obama 49% v. Hillary 51%. We will keep updating this. Okay, the gap is now NINETEEN THOUSAND VOTES. All the remaining votes — most of them, at least, according to our Numbers King John CNN King — are in Gary. More »