Hey, your new president gave his first presidential interview to a teevee channel … THE AL ARABIYA network, in DUBAI, or at least the network’s studio in Washington. ZOMG they are already here! [IHT]

Barack Obama is so very fancy that he has three names instead of two or even just one, like Madonna, and like the socialist Muslin alien he is, he will insist on reciting all three of his names in a Klingon-Arabic patois when he is sworn in on Thomas Jefferson’s Koran. This is an extremely disturbing development, especially given that the last socialist sworn into office — Jimmy Carter — only used two names in accordance with his status as a common prole. MORE »

Mysterious Wonkette Texas operative “The Doctor” (RP?) has forwarded us a delightful e-mail (s)he received this morning, probably from a great aunt or uncle, that thoroughly explains how Texas has the resources it needs to secede from the Union, which it should do immediately, “since B. Hussein Obama won the election.” Silly sheeple, only now they get it; the Paultards have been lobbying for this since January or August or whenever it was that Ron Paul stopped running. *FACEPALM* MORE »

MCAIN-PALIN KKK CAMPAIGN UPDATE: Sarah Palin and John McCain have been holding KKK rallies all week, asking the klansmen “Who is the REAL Barack Obama” and getting all sorts of “colorful” responses. At today’s joint KKK rally in Pennsylvania, the dude introducing McCain and Palin fired up the racial death brigades by mentioning “Barack Hussein Obama” two times. Whaddaya think about that, HEGHH?? [HuffPo]

Oh good sweet god jesus shit WHAT IS EVEN HAPPENING HERE? The YouTube description says, “I came home from football practice one evening and my parents were talking to our neighbors who were drunk. This is what happened … I live in southeastern kentucky FYI.” Well, you have been warned, America. Here are three drunk Kentucky hillbillies ranting about Obama while sitting on a filthy AIDS unicorn. [YouTube]

Have you ever thought of how Tiger Woods is like Barack Obama, and how the fact that Obama was born in the early 1960s is definitive proof that he is a Communist? And if you haven’t, might this willful ignorance be due to the Political Correctness Machine’s crushing of honest inquiry? MORE »

He might talk about “labor rights” and “protecting the weakest among us,” but at the end of the day, presidential hopeful Barack Obama is just another double-talking fat cat. His ambition is so monstrous that now he’s turned out The Children to craft charming tee shirts in support of his cause. For shame, Mr. Obama. For shame. [Cafe Press: Kids Love Obama]

This informative graphic, as a follow-up to the Christian’s timeline of Muslimobama’s life, comes from our fantastic commenter Serolf Divad, h/t Pat Robertson. Imagine all these terrorists “running around the White House,” forever!

The Fundies are out to get Barack, and they have created a timeline of Barack’s Islamic Muslim life on the website MyChurch.org. It features some revealing insight into why Barack Obama, “Son of a Luo Tribesman,” plans on blowing up the White House in the name of Muslim Jesus. MORE »

Maybe this Luo tribesman isn’t a pagan Muslim fundamentalist after all. Could he be…a cult leader, beholden to no religion but his own? Too soon to tell. We’ll have definitive proof after the first sarin gas attack on Clinton supporters. [Political Punch]

This lovely image is running on U.S. Veterans Dispath, the website of famous Swift-boater Ted Sampley. I had always thought Barry was an Indian myself, so at least it clears that up. [U.S. Veteran's Dispatch via Pam's House Blend]