bain capital

The city of Detroit, which has been basically issuing bonds to pay for daily expenses since 2005, is in such bad fiscal shape that even people who bought exurban McMansions in 2005 with reverse-money-down ARMs think the city is in a financial mess. That’s why America’s favorite pro-”right-to-work” nerd-governor, Rick Snyder, is going to appoint an emergency […]

Hello, Matt Taibbi, how are you making us hate Mitt Romney even more today than we did, say, yesterday (which is saying a lot since we had to sit through his forty minute speech about himself yesterday and also a slide show about him and his kids, blagh). But as you will soon discover, making […]

Hello Wonketteers, by now you have probably realized that Gawker released 950 pages of Bain Capital records, and that this is either very important or a waste of everyone’s time, depending on whom you ask. WHICH IS IT? IS IT IMPORTANT OR IS IT A WASTE OF TIME? And also, what is a total return equity […]

It was so kind of person or persons unknown to give 950 pages of Bain Capital records to Gawker, exposing (among other things) Mitt Romney’s financial portfolio, and tax avoidance strategies employed by Bain. BUT WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN? It could mean a lot! Or nothing! There is so much information, and it is […]

Mitt Romney has taken to the editorial page of the Wall Street Journal to share with you a children’s story about How Mitt Romney Saved Capitalism. This is in preparation for the upcoming sequel, Mitt Romney Saves Everything In The World And Paul Ryan Is Here, Too. The back-to-school season is here, and as parents […]

The Internet is rapidly zeroing in on the identity of Harry Reid’s source, the one who was like “oh yeah Harry, that guy, Romney, no taxes from that guy,” which Harry Reid reiterated on the Senate floor, destroying any semblance of what had previously been a sense of good faith and comity between the two […]

So, you know this picture? Wonkette editor Kris E. Benson likes to run it a lot. You’ve seen it 50 times maybe. Or 500, who knows? (Personally, our Romney-pic go-to is romneyapplauds.jpg.) So it turns out this picture is of Romney and pals celebrating their initial funding. And since Your Wonkette is like the Sesame […]

Reaganesque? Ol’ Mittens? The Man With the Golden Tongue? Sure, he’s got the hair, and the complete lack of devotion to anything resembling fact or verifiable truth, but really, Reaganesque? Yes, Mitt Romney is “Reaganesque,” by which we mean “balls-deep in murdering nuns and Latin American death squads.”

It has been a No Good Terrible Horrible Very Bad Week for Mittens Romney, His Lord High Hairgel. So he lied about some stuff (every “stuff”), so what who cares? No, way more important is the hotness of these young people the Obama campaign pulled off the street, to read his lordship’s statement on Batman […]

The Boston Globe has a fantastic story today about Mitt Romney, the local candidate. Romney has long claimed that he left Bain Capital in 1999, shortly before the firm unleashed a particularly sharp, blood-soaked assault on American jobs, to take up his new job as an Olympics Saver. And yet documents that Bain later filed […]

Have you been paying attention to the controversy caused by the Washington Post’s article on Mitt Romney’s venture capitalism firm Bain Capital? Probably not because you, like so many other Americans, can’t stand reading about Mitt Romney due to his general awfulness. So your Wonkette will fill you in on the details: what happened was […]

Today, people are re-thinking same-sex marriage and moon bases, and selling off movie theaters. Wait, what? Is this the future? Where’s my jetpack? Same-sex marriage opposition has dropped significantly since the President spoke in favor of it. Oh, so if the President jumped off a cliff, would you too? [Washington Post]

Does Barack Obama understand capitalism? This is a legitimate question that Jennifer Rubin of the Washington Post would like answered, given that Obama is a Socialist bully who uses intemperate language and who is NEVER EVER THERE for America’s bff Israel and MIGHT take powers granted to him by Obamacare to legislate “new and previously […]

You did it, Twitter! You got superhero Newark Mayor Cory Booker to retract and correct his Sunday Meet the Press statement that examining His Lord High Hairgel’s record at Bain was “nauseating” and “vilifying private equity.” Yay YOU! After the jump, BOOKER’s hostage video. It’s nice!

What kind of underwear do you have on? Are they magical? No? Outta here! Bain Capital, a job creating powerhouse established by America’s number one job creator Mitt Romney, is being sued by a group of people that claim they were fired for not being part of the Mormon church (LDS). This rogue group of […]