Wonkette

“Each and every page is watermarked with the baby Jesus’ tears.”

God bless the Book Party Season. We haven’t paid for a drink in weeks. Even, surprisingly, at the party last night for John Ashcroft’s Never Again: How America Got Her Groove Back.

After the jump, our exclusive report, with even more exclusive pictures from our very own Intern Nick.

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WHY IS MICHELLE MALKIN MAKING THE BABY JESUS CRY? MORE »

We apologize for our long absence today. We had to lie down for a few hours after witnessing THE CUTEST THING THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED ON THIS EARTH. We’re serious. Baby Jesus surrounded by kittens on rollerskates singing “All I Want for Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth,” that might come close. A puppy riding a pony in a cowboy outfit while pretending to rob a bank? Eh. We have seen The Stick in a bowl. Observe:

Sure, he’s still getting it on with that frightening butt plug large dog toy, but, man… The rolling, the tumbling, the turning into a furry little yin-yang symbol? Oh, we’re going to have to lie down again. MORE »