Tag Archives: autism

  busted

Dr. Ben Carson Was Big Fan Of Using Baby Parts Back In His Doctorin’ Days

Dumb at doctoring.
Dumb at doctoring. OOH! OOH! BREAKING FETUS PARTS NEWS! You know how “pro-life” Ben Carson is running for president, but before that, he was the BEST doctor in all the land, and the first person ever to separate twins conjoined at the head? And know how Carson, as a doctor, recently offered his very medical opinion that not only is Planned Parenthood chopping up babies and auctioning them off on eBay (no it’s not), but it also does racist genocide to the blacks, racistly, because this one time Margaret Sanger, blah blah blah bullshit? Yes well, Dr. Jen Gunter, a ladyparts doctor-blogger who specializes in “wielding the lasso of truth,” uncovered a fun little nugget of information, which is that the very same Ben Carson not only did research on fetal tissue, but also wrote papers about it like he’s not even ashamed of it! Who’s the racist genociding Planned Parenthood baby parts secret shopper now, HUH? Read more on Dr. Ben Carson Was Big Fan Of Using Baby Parts Back In His Doctorin’ Days…
  Not A Rash Decision

California Pries Measles Out Of Anti-Vaxxers’ Cold, Dumb Hands

Are your brains melting yet, Mommy? Are they? Now, about that pony...
Hey, how about some Science Nice Time? California Gov. Jerry Brown signed the state’s new vaccine requirement into law today, over the cries of “Government Oppression!” and “Big Pharma! Big Pharma! Big Pharma!” from anti-vaxxers. The bill eliminates exemptions for personal and religious beliefs, even though many Californians will be sad because their precious unvaccinated disease vectors will not be allowed to attend public schools. Read more on California Pries Measles Out Of Anti-Vaxxers’ Cold, Dumb Hands…
  Munchausen Melodies

The Snake Oil Bulletin: Let’s Give Each Other Bleach Enemas, In Our Butts!

Ladies, Gentlemen, and Otherwise, welcome back to the Snake Oil Bulletin, the weekly compendium of codswallop and fiddle-faddle guaranteed to make your stomach quease and your palm rocket straight to your face. Should we do a story on bleach enemas this week? Yes, yes we should. Hope you got your Clorox fan memorabilia all set for this week, because the butt bleachers are back to make your derriere squeaky clean and your stomach churn with joy! Read more on The Snake Oil Bulletin: Let’s Give Each Other Bleach Enemas, In Our Butts!…
  the commentczar's in town

Deleted Comments: This One’s About Vaccines And Vaginas!

Vacation plan: Clean apartment, finish reading that Twain biography. Vacation reality: Booze & MLP fanfic
Oh, Wonkers, we have some beautiful deletia for you this week! Looks to us like some people have really been working overtime in the Derp Mines to bring us this fine assortment of stupidity. For starters, we have this thought-provoking bit of turnabout from “John Smith” (Real name: “Bob Johnson”), who understands that Bobby Jindal just wants to protect Liberty from the homos. Just think about this — would you libs really be so hot on forcing Christians to provide services to gay people if it also meant that gay people would have to serve people with whom they have traditionally been at Culture War? Read more on Deleted Comments: This One’s About Vaccines And Vaginas!…
  Look! More Science To Ignore!

No, Vaccines Are Not ‘Raping’ Your Children, Says Science

Or not.
Rejoice! A new study shows that even among children who are at a higher risk for autism, getting vaccinated against childhood illnesses isn’t linked to autism. In the face of clear scientific evidence like that, you’ve pretty much got to expect that the anti-vaxxers will now just say, “Oh, man, were we ever wrong!” and quietly go away, possibly borne on a magic carpet carried by flying pigs. Read more on No, Vaccines Are Not ‘Raping’ Your Children, Says Science…
  Accurate reporting is a liberal conspiracy!

Mean Federal Judge Won’t Let James O’Keefe Sue For Libel Just Because He Wasn’t Libeled, Unfair!

Behind that mask is a very sad face.
Rightwing dildo-lube-boat-enthusiast James O’Keefe is being oppressed again by activist judges and the mean liberal media. An obviously terrible judge has struck down his libel case arising from his infamous (failed) attempt to pretend to be a phone company worker for the purposes of sneaking into then-Louisiana Senator Mary Landrieu’s office so O’Keefe could, we don’t know … bug it? Mess with her phone lines? Kidnap the senator and take her on a dildo lube boat ride to hell? You never know with “journalists” like O’Keefe! Whatever it was, O’Keefe and his rarely sexed pals were charged with tampering with phone lines, and they pleaded out on a lesser misdemeanor charge of simply trying to get into a federal facility using the age-old tactic of lying. Read more on Mean Federal Judge Won’t Let James O’Keefe Sue For Libel Just Because He Wasn’t Libeled, Unfair!…
 

The Snake Oil Bulletin: I See Bullsh*t in Your Future

Greetings, Comrades! Welcome back to the Snake Oil Bulletin, your weekly compendium of charlatans and rapscallions just waiting to sell you health, wealth, and salvation if only you’ll give them your money. We’ve got a full pan of bullshit to sift through if we’re going to find that gold nugget of hilarity, so let’s waste no time and get right down to it. Read more on The Snake Oil Bulletin: I See Bullsh*t in Your Future…
 

The Snake Oil Bulletin: Can The Paleo Diet Cure Autism? Why No! No It Cannot!

of course, cavemen all died by 30
Howdy-doo, folks! Welcome back to your Snake Oil Bulletin, the weekly round-up of pseudoscience, nonsense, and assorted quackery this side of the Mississippi. It’s been a pretty painful week so far, but with the weekend comes good news that far worse off than you are all the anti-vaccine autism-exploiters out there. Let’s read on and feel the warmth of schadenfreude wash over us all, shall we? Read more on The Snake Oil Bulletin: Can The Paleo Diet Cure Autism? Why No! No It Cannot!…
  Still No Vaccine For Stupid Yet

Georgia Congresscrank Never Vaccinated His Kids And They All Turned Out Mostly OK

He's a real hot item, Loudermilk
Yet another Republican has gone on the record in favor of infectious diseases. At a town hall meeting last week in Cartersville, Georgia, freshman Rep. Barry Loudermilk explained that he thinks vaccinations should not be mandatory, because none of his unvaccinated children ever caught anything that killed them. Why, yes, Loudermilk is a member of the House Science and Technology Committee. Why do you ask? Read more on Georgia Congresscrank Never Vaccinated His Kids And They All Turned Out Mostly OK…
  Speaker For The Derp

Spokane Board Of Health Member Standing Up For Anti-Vaxx Rights Of Tinfoil Hat Community

Who will speak for the loons?
It’s good to know that there are freedom-loving men like Spokane City Councilman Mike Fagan. This weekend, Fagan, a proud anti-vaxxer who somehow got appointed to the Spokane Regional Board of Health, rallied like-minded paranoids to oppose Washington’s proposal to repeal a provision in state law allowing parents to opt out of mandatory vaccinations for their kids on the basis of “personal belief.” The legislation would leave in place exemptions for medical conditions and religious beliefs, but if parents don’t have the chance to expose their children and the community to easily prevented communicable diseases, then the Sons of Liberty might just as well have not dumped all those crates of MMR vaccine into Boston Harbor in 1771. Read more on Spokane Board Of Health Member Standing Up For Anti-Vaxx Rights Of Tinfoil Hat Community…
  Making a Killing

The Snake Oil Bulletin: Bleach Enemas ‘n Cream

Fresh out of butt jokes this week.
Howdy-doo, folks! Welcome back to your weekly round-up of the internet’s best in nonsensical nonsense, The Snake Oil Bulletin. This week’s selection will be injected straight up your keister by none other than your favorite salesman, Fare la Volpe, Chakra Wizard and “Doctor” of Chiropractic Surgery. Let’s dive right in to it, or right up it as the case may be. Read more on The Snake Oil Bulletin: Bleach Enemas ‘n Cream…
  sit down and shut up

Chris Christie Smacked Down On Vaccines By Chris Christie’s Office

Well, maybe panic just a little
Wait a minute, folks, Chris Christie never said people shouldn’t vaccinate their kids! Except that one time today when he kind of did say he was in favor of “balance” between public health and parental choice, and that other time in 2009 he expressed sympathy with anti-vaxxers, which we’ll get to in a moment. But no, he really does think vaccination is important, his office says now. Read more on Chris Christie Smacked Down On Vaccines By Chris Christie’s Office…
  No vaccine For Stupid

Quack Anti-Vaxxers: Protect Your Kids With Sugar Instead

Also, many car accidents aren't fatal, so I don't wear seatbelts.
Just in case you needed a reason to slap your forehead and despair for humanity this morning, how about a recent report from CBC’s Marketplace program on anti-vaccine myths being fed to new parents in the Great White North, eh? Using hidden cameras, reporters visited several Canadian homeopaths who explained that vaccines might give your precious babby autism (do we actually need a link debunking that? Of course we do), while measles and other highly contagious diseases are No Big Deal. The CBC report cites estimates that as many as 40 percent of Canadian 7-year-olds are not up to date on their vaccines. Read more on Quack Anti-Vaxxers: Protect Your Kids With Sugar Instead…
  all the derp that's fit to herp

Derp Roundup: Your Weekly Tour Of The Terrible

Welcome to another edition of Derp Roundup, the weekly feature where we steam-clean our browser tabs and scrape together all the stories that weren’t worth their own posts, but were too stupid to ignore altogether. We recommend you numb yourself against the dumbassery that is sure to follow. Read more on Derp Roundup: Your Weekly Tour Of The Terrible…
  it's the most wonderful time of the year

New Mexico Teacher Helps Make ‘Santa Is White’ Official Stupidest Meme For Christmas 2013

Thanks to a 9th-grade teacher in Rio Rancho, New Mexico, America now has its Official Stupidest Meme for the 2013 holiday season. Megyn Kelly’s teevee contribution to the idiocy was certainly the first and loudest, but an unnamed teacher at Cleveland High School gave “Don’t you know Santa Claus is white?” its definitive real-world test drive last week, mocking (ironically?) an autistic black kid wearing a Santa hat & beard to school. As far as we’re concerned, that’s all the tipping point needed: 2013 is now the Year Of White Santa. Now let’s all go make some children cry! Read more on New Mexico Teacher Helps Make ‘Santa Is White’ Official Stupidest Meme For Christmas 2013…