Tag: autism

Ask Wonkette: Can Melon Trump Indeed Sue For Rose Words About Her Son?

Wonkette helpfully answers readers' questions, helpfully.

San Antonio District Attorney Will Put Vaccines IN JAIL!

God bless ye, gentle readers, and welcome once more to the Snake Oil Bulletin! This week we have a virulent case of Dumb Pox spreading around, so do be sure to take precautions. Drink plenty of bleach, snort all...
dear leader plz don't steal our emails

Glorious Leader Cures Cancer Forever with Evian

North Korean leader Kim Jon-un has revealed a miracle cancer cure: springwater that has "smaller molecules." See? Commies don't need filthy capitalism to be charlatans!

Florida Cops Protect Community From Black Man Lying On Back With Hands In Air

There's undoubtedly a perfectly reasonable explanation for this latest shooting of an unarmed black man. Who was flat on his back. With his hands in the air.

Gwyneth Paltrow Wants To Put Bee Poison On Her Face: Your Snake Oil Bulletin!

Greetings, Pilgrims. We welcome you to the hallowed ground of this, the Snake Oil Bulletin. You've come just in time for the Cleansing of Impurities. Get on your knees, strap that basket to your head, and prepare yourself for...

Anti-Vaccine Film Safely Removed From Robert De Niro’s Ass

Welcome back to the cheaters, rapscallions, and assorted flim-flammers alike. It's time once more for the Snake Oil Bulletin! This week we have a double dose of dumb-dumbs being extra diddly-dumb about vaccines. Do vaccines cause autism? Still nope!...

Idiot Gov. Paul LePage Doesn’t Want Refugees Spreading The ‘Ziki Fly’ All Over Maine

Everyone hates Maine Gov. Paul LePage. Literally everyone on the planet. There are as-yet undiscovered tribes living in the deepest parts of the Amazon, and the first thing they're going to say when some intrepid anthropologist first makes contact...
Connect the dots, sheeple!

2015: The Year Anti-Vaxxers Made Measles The New Black

In 2015, science remained a suspicious activity many conservative politicians thought was probably all a leftist plot, with only one Republican presidential candidate willing to say that climate change is real and human-caused. And that guy never had a...

Why Did Ben Carson’s Enemies Force Him To Shill For Quack Cancer Cure?

Now that Dr. Ben Carson is the Republican Party's new daddy of the month, his enemies are out to get him. How? By hopping in their submarine time machines, apparently, and forcing him to use his reputation as a...
Donald Trump brought his favorite album

Republicans Demand Kinder, Gentler Debates With Multiple Choice Questions

Following Wednesday's GOP primary debate in which mean CNBC moderators asked him questions that required him to do math or lie about that decade he shilled for quack cancer cures, Dr. Ben Carson decided he's had enough of biased reporters who...
Just because I'm in a video with their logo in the corner doesn't mean I have an involvement with them

Ben Carson Only Endorsed Quack Nutritional Supplements A Tiny Bit, For 10 Years

Dr. Ben Carson would like everyone to know he definitely was not a pitchman for the sketchy nutritional supplements company Mannatech for 10 years. No involvement with that company at all. He only gave a couple speeches on the company's behalf....
The real holocausters, we guess.

The Snake Oil Bulletin: Sesame Street Holocausting Your Children!

Greetings, pilgrims! Saddle on up to the caravan here, and let your old pal Dr. Volpe spin you the tale of a joker-faced jackal-beast who decided to pick a fight with puppets. As you'll soon see, dear reader, up...

The Snake Oil Bulletin: And Now For Some Olden Timey Bullcrap!

Greetings and salutations, friends! It's time once again for your favoritest little traveling stage show, the Snake Oil Bulletin! We've got a jam-packed agenda this go around, so let's dive right into the muck by harking back to a...
PHYSICIAN, HEAL THY OWN BRAIN.

Dr. Ben Carson Was Big Fan Of Using Baby Parts Back In His Doctorin’ Days

OOH! OOH! BREAKING FETUS PARTS NEWS! You know how "pro-life" Ben Carson is running for president, but before that, he was the BEST doctor in all the land, and the first person ever to separate twins conjoined at the head?...
Are your brains melting yet, Mommy? Are they? Now, about that pony...

California Pries Measles Out Of Anti-Vaxxers’ Cold, Dumb Hands

Hey, how about some Science Nice Time? California Gov. Jerry Brown signed the state's new vaccine requirement into law today, over the cries of "Government Oppression!" and "Big Pharma! Big Pharma! Big Pharma!" from anti-vaxxers. The bill eliminates exemptions...

The Snake Oil Bulletin: Let’s Give Each Other Bleach Enemas, In Our Butts!

Ladies, Gentlemen, and Otherwise, welcome back to the Snake Oil Bulletin, the weekly compendium of codswallop and fiddle-faddle guaranteed to make your stomach quease and your palm rocket straight to your face. Should we do a story on bleach...