Tag Archives: aurora

  gun control

Mean Ladies Bully Responsible Gun Owners Into Spitting On Them, Threatening To Rape And Kill Them, For Freedom

Here’s a not-at-all nice story from Mother Jones about the lengths to which a whole bunch of Responsible Second Amendment Advocates have harassed and threatened women who have called for limitations on gun ownership. We want to make it clear that we don’t think all gun fondlers are misogynist assholes, of course; MoJo writer Mark Follman has simply found a whole lot of completely isolated instances where individual “bad apples” have “gone too far” (maybe!) in their wholly justified concern that these anti-gun extremists will destroy America by advocating for tyrannical measures like background checks and limits on magazine size. When you consider what’s at stake — the Constitution itself — it’s perfectly understandable that some lovers of freedom might be driven to spit on, threaten with murder or rape, and perform mock executions of the radicals who would seize all guns through nefarious measures like background checks, which only 90% of Americans support. Read more on Mean Ladies Bully Responsible Gun Owners Into Spitting On Them, Threatening To Rape And Kill Them, For Freedom…
  slatepitch

Colorado State Senator Delighted Aurora Shooter Had Access To 100 Bullets At Once

There’s no dearth of terrible state legislators being terrible but we really have to hand it to one Mr. Senator Bernie Herpin (R-Awful) of Colorado, who decided to take the gut-wrenching tragedy of the Aurora, Colorado, theater shooting and use it to promote his gun-fondling agenda. Now, this is nothing new, but Herpin really took it up a notch by explaining how it was a super great and lucky thing that shooter James Holmes had a 100-round magazine. “As it turns out, that was maybe a good thing that he had a 100-round magazine because it jammed,” Herpin said Wednesday during a hearing on a bill that would repeal a state ban on high-capacity magazines that hold more than 15 rounds. “If he had four, five, six 15-round magazines, there’s no telling how much damage he could have done until a good guy with a gun showed up,” Herpin added. Smart take! Very counterintuitive! Have you thought of pitching this to Slate, Bernie Herpin? Or maybe Thought Catalog? “12 Cool Ways To Kill A Fuckton of People With Just One Magazine.” “8 Great Reasons To Date Dudes That Buy High-Capacity Magazines.” Read more on Colorado State Senator Delighted Aurora Shooter Had Access To 100 Bullets At Once…
  the right to be a jerk shall not be infringed

Gun Fondlers Just Want Equal Time At Aurora Victims’ Ceremony To Remember The Poor Confiscated Guns

A pro-gun group plans to hold a demonstration in favor of the 2nd Amendment in the same suburban Denver park where a remembrance will be held for victims of the Aurora theater shootings, which occurred one year ago today. Members of Rocky Mountain Gun Owners insist that they have no choice but to stand their ground in the park, since the remembrance is being sponsored by New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg’s group Mayors Against Illegal Guns, which has threatened freedom by pressing state legislatures to pass slightly tougher restrictions on gun sales. Showing up to advocate gun rights at a memorial for shooting victims is simply RMGO’s way of ensuring that survivors of the shootings not get away with politicizing the victims’ deaths. Read more on Gun Fondlers Just Want Equal Time At Aurora Victims’ Ceremony To Remember The Poor Confiscated Guns…
  Our Cold Dead Hands

Celebrate Independence Day By Shooting Off Your Gun: A July 4th Gun Fun Times Roundup

Guten Tag, liberal Wonkstaffel! With the upcoming holiday when all good God-fearing Americans celebrate the founding of the Greatest Nation in the History of Ever™, we thought it a good opportunity to check up on the continued efforts to protect/eviscerate that most sacred of all American freedoms, the right to vote the right to own as many death-dealing penis substitutes as you need to feel safe and secure in your own home. Specifically, we were wondering about our old friend Steamin’ Adam Kokesh and his plans for this glorious Fourth of July now that he has canceled his Million Armed Lunatics March on our nation’s capital. In its place Adam had called on his followers to march in small groups on all fifty state capitals in an event he is calling the Final American Revolution, and we wanted to reassure ourselves that our decision to be nowhere near Sacramento or even Phoenix this Thursday was a good one (really this is a good decision for any day of the year.) Read more on Celebrate Independence Day By Shooting Off Your Gun: A July 4th Gun Fun Times Roundup…
  99 ways to die

Heavy Metal Yowler Dave Mustaine Knows Obama Did All Those Shootings, Probably 9/11 Too

If there’s one aspect of modern political discourse your Wonkette editor finds unbearably tedious, it’s “Remember how our side did X and you reacted with outrage, but now YOUR side did X and WHERE’S THE OUTRAGE,” because the only thing duller than arguing about tax policy or whatever is meta-arguing about arguing. That having been said, remember when the Dixie Chicks said “we’re ashamed that the President of the United States is from Texas” at a concert in London and people were all like “HOW DARE YOU ATTACK OUR PRESIDENT IN FRONT OF THE FOREIGNERS???” Well, um, Dave Mustaine, frontman for Megadeth, told a crowd in Singapore that Barack Obama staged the shootings in Aurora and Wisconsin as part of his plan to take away our guns, and also impose Nazi rule! This an important Lapse In Civility, right? Or maybe it’s just hilarious? Read more on Heavy Metal Yowler Dave Mustaine Knows Obama Did All Those Shootings, Probably 9/11 Too…
  the exorcist

NRO Editor Kathryn Jean Lopez: Was Aurora Shooter Possessed By Beelzebub?

Does Kathryn Jean Lopez believe the Aurora shooter, James Holmes, was possessed by demons? She does not say so. What she says is that a story by a Catholic priest who says possession is real and posits that James Holmes was in fact possessed by demons, is “interesting.” Are RTs endorsements? Of course not, DON’T BE RIDICULOSE! But when something is Catholic and ‘tarded, you can bet K-Lo is taking it for her gospel every time: Read more on NRO Editor Kathryn Jean Lopez: Was Aurora Shooter Possessed By Beelzebub?…
  twit

Idiots On Aurora: Pt. Trois(t)

We are almost perfectly sure Wall Street Journal resident douchebag James Taranto didn’t mean to call down the Vengeance of the Internet last night, when he tweeted about the three women whose boyfriends died shielding them from the fusillade in Aurora, “I hope the girls whose boyfriends died to save them were worthy of the sacrifice.” Let us repeat that, in case you were skimming that first graf: “I hope the girls whose boyfriends died to save them were worthy of the sacrifice.” Read more on Idiots On Aurora: Pt. Trois(t)…
  modern times

Ice-T, Conservative Hero

And so it’s 2012, and rapper Ice-T is not just a television star, but a conservative hero, for his stance on guns. If nothing else in modern times showed you so vividly how twisted our politics have become, let the very existence of this ad hoc coalition do the trick. Back in the day, Ice-T was history’s greatest monster for writing protest songs about police brutality called “Cop Killer;” now he is a brave defender of a man’s right to defend himself against tyranny, with kewl guns. Read more on Ice-T, Conservative Hero…
  also pulled the trigger probably

Wingnuts Furious: Obama Hugged A White Gal

Do you see that picture, above, of Barack Hussein NOoBaMA hugging a white woman who saved her friend’s life in the Aurora massacre? Yes, Stephanie Davies stayed with her friend Allie Young, who’d been shot in the neck, and kept applying pressure to the wound even after her friend told her to run. What do you suppose the wingnuts have to say about Barack Obama going to visit wounded people in the hospital? Do you suppose they have an opinion? We bet they are all saying, “oh, that’s nice, Barack Obama went to the hospital and made some people feel better,” we bet that is what they are probably saying. They could even have made a joke, like, guess he didn’t need 110 fundraisers in six months har har. Sure, they could have said that! Let us find out the answer to this important question, after the jump! Read more on Wingnuts Furious: Obama Hugged A White Gal…
  Praise the lord and stuff the ammunition into a banana clip

Idiots On Aurora, Part Douche: God Was The Second Gunman And Many Victims Went to Hell

A time of national tragedy is a time to come together as Americans, a time to heal, a time to put aside partisan differences and seek common ground. For instance, it is a time to remember that no man is an island, that we are all connected by bonds of community and love, and that one madman’s meticulously planned killing rampage may well have its roots in the Supreme Court’s decisions in Engel v. Vitale (1962) and Abington School District v. Schempp (1963), and for good measure maybe Roe v. Wade (1973). Echoing the “thoughts” of weasel-faced hate spigot Louis Gohmert, another prominent member of the Party of Personal Responsibility, Mike Huckabee, has come forward to explain that while James Holmes (whom Huckabee would not name, on the Voldemort Principle) had his finger on the trigger, he was urged on by millions of aborted fetuses and by the judicially mandated stifling of schoolchildren’s prayers. Read more on Idiots On Aurora, Part Douche: God Was The Second Gunman And Many Victims Went to Hell…
  Shootout at the Not-OK Corral

Dark Knight Shooting Victims Practically Shot Themselves, Says Prominent Arizona Idiot

You could say a lot of things about the words of former Arizona state senator Russell Pearce, the lead sponsor of SB 1070, the ol’ “get ridda the browns” law. Most of them have something to do with racism. None of them resemble “consoling” or “reasonable.” So when he issued a statement about the Dark Knight shooting in Aurora, he did not disappoint: Did you know, for example, that the people to blame for the shooting are the people who got shot? “Had someone been prepared and armed they could have stopped this ‘bad’ man from most of this tragedy,” he wrote. “All that was needed is one Courages/Brave man prepared mentally or otherwise to stop this it could have been done.” Translation: People just LET THEMSELVES get shot? What a bunch of PANSIES! Also, I am drunk. Read more on Dark Knight Shooting Victims Practically Shot Themselves, Says Prominent Arizona Idiot…
  hush now just shhhh

Idiots On Aurora

Most US Americans took a rare day off yesterday from being total dicks — exception, as always, for Rep. Louie Gohmert, the newest supernova in the Cavalcade of Wonkette Stars — but a few of our fellow citizens just could not keep the stupid from oozing out between their poo-flecked lips. Let us look at them, shaking our head in sadness at their total and complete lack of humanity, together. Read more on Idiots On Aurora…
  An Armed Society is a Bullet-Riddled Society

Notes From The Periphery Of A Shooting: A Wonkette Moment Of Tenderness

You don’t have to have witnessed a random shooting in a public place to question whether an armed bystander could have stopped the shooter, but it helps. On the morning of May 21, 1998, on the way to a movie matinee, I stopped by a Tucson post office to send a package of comic books (“The Maxx”) to be autographed by the artist/writer Sam Kieth. I take my nerding seriously. Just like people always say in news reports, I heard several loud popping noises, and someone shouted “Get down! They’ve got a gun!” Everybody dived for whatever little cover there was — I squeezed up against the wall next to a table, no cover at all really, and a few feet away, a woman crouched down trying to shush her three-year old boy, who like a movie cliché, was saying “Mommy, what’s happening?” I was waiting for the door from the lobby to open and then, for the worst. There were a few more shots, and then silence, and eventually someone came in saying “They’re gone.” I’ve never been so glad to happy to hear sirens approaching. A couple of people carried in from the lobby a guy who’d been shot in the leg and laid him on a bench; I put the thick padded envelope I was going to mail under his head. The hole in his calf was a round red dot, exactly the size of the .38 slug that had gone through it, and not bleeding too badly. While we were waiting for the police to arrive, one of the postal workers said, “Well, at least it wasn’t one of us doing the shooting this time!” Read more on Notes From The Periphery Of A Shooting: A Wonkette Moment Of Tenderness…
 

Louis Gohmert Claims ‘FIRST’ In World Comment Thread On Colorado Shootings

In the always-crowded race to become the first public figure to say something incredibly douchey immediately after a tragedy, it would appear that bragging rights go to Rep. Louis Gohmert, (R-TX), who, asked about the shootings in an interview on right-wing radio, took the opportunity to blame the shootings on America’s failure to be Jesusy enough: “You know what really gets me, as a Christian, is to see the ongoing attacks on Judeo-Christian beliefs, and then some senseless crazy act of a derelict takes place,” Gohmert said…. “People say … where was God in all of this?” Gohmert said. “We’ve threatened high school graduation participations, if they use God’s name, they’re going to be jailed … I mean that kind of stuff. Where was God? What have we done with God? We don’t want him around. I kind of like his protective hand being present.” Read more on Louis Gohmert Claims ‘FIRST’ In World Comment Thread On Colorado Shootings…
  you're kidding us

ABC News Should Fire Brian Ross, And Other Notes On Being Terrible

There are 12 people dead and 50 injured at a movie theater in Colorado, including a baby. It’s not as though you can’t look into a suspect’s history after a massacre and report things as they’re confirmed. That’s what the media should do! What the media, and every idiot on the Twitter, should not do, is first seek out a narrow angle that probably has nothing to do with crazy people going crazy — say, “what political party is this insane person in?” — and then get it wrong out of pure laziness. This matters. Let’s shame some people. First up: ABC News should fire Brian Ross. Read more on ABC News Should Fire Brian Ross, And Other Notes On Being Terrible…