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Posts Tagged ‘ask a lobbyist’

DC Is A Target-Rich Environment

Wednesday, November 7th, 2007

Every week, I answer your questions about how laws get made and why they probably shouldn’t. If you have a question about the dirty business of doing business in Washington, ask me.

This week: How lobbyists stay employed, why hookers are more expensive than getting everyone drunk and screwing, and target-rich environments. MORE »


The Male-Female Lobbyist Mating Dance

Wednesday, October 31st, 2007

Every week, our Anonymous Lobbyist answers your questions about how laws get made and why they probably shouldn’t. If you have a question about the dirty business of doing business in Washington, ask her.

This week: Men on Capitol Hill might be sexist; Earth might revolve around the sun. MORE »


What Kind of Sweater Puppies Would You Vote For?

Wednesday, October 24th, 2007

i iz opraThe following presentation about tits was written by the Anonymous Tit-Watcher, who is also the Anonymous Lobbyist. Enjoy!

There are few people as obsessed with my tits (and their socio-political meaning) as I am, other than my exes and a few of my readers, so perhaps it stands to reason that I have become intrigued by the range of boobs among the potential First Ladies — and what they could mean for their husbands’ candidacies. To put that in to context, I spent much of yesterday examining the breasts of their predecessors to see what America really wants out of the knockers of the wife of the Commander-in-Chief. My findings, with an accompanying photo gallery (!), after the jump. MORE »


Our Favorite Congressman, Mr. Handsy

Wednesday, October 24th, 2007

Every week, our Anonymous Lobbyist answers your questions about how laws get made and why they probably shouldn’t. If you have a question about the dirty business of doing business in Washington, ask her.

This week: Does anyone in Congress actually “read” legislation? MORE »


That Intern Looks Tasty, I Think I’ll Have That

Wednesday, October 17th, 2007

Every week, our Anonymous Lobbyist answers your questions about how laws get made and why they probably shouldn’t. If you have a question about the dirty business of doing business in Washington, ask her.

This week: Who do I fuck to get money?

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Define Evil

Wednesday, October 10th, 2007

Every week, our Anonymous Lobbyist answers your questions about how laws get made and why they probably shouldn’t. If you have a question about the dirty business of doing business in Washington, ask her.

This week: dirty money for clean water.

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(Why) Do They Hate Us?

Wednesday, October 3rd, 2007

Every week, our Anonymous Lobbyist answers your questions about how laws get made and why they probably shouldn’t. If you have a question about the dirty business of doing business in Washington, ask her.

This week: lines — where do you draw them?

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Revenge Ain’t So Sweet

Wednesday, September 26th, 2007

Every week, our Anonymous Lobbyist answers your questions about how laws get made and why they probably shouldn’t. If you have a question about the dirty business of doing business in Washington, ask her.

This week: walk a mile in a lobbyist’s shoes.

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Affirmative Inaction

Wednesday, September 12th, 2007

Every week, our Anonymous Lobbyist answers your questions about how laws get made and why they probably shouldn’t. If you have a question about the dirty business of doing business in Washington, ask her.

This week: where are the prudes and minorities? Also, stripping.

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Everyone At Fault in Bridge Disaster

Friday, August 3rd, 2007

Thanks for stopping by, Laura -- grab a bullhorn! - WonketteWhen inexplicable tragedies happen, some turn to god, and some turn to drink. We turn to our Anonymous Lobbyist. And also drink.

The 35W bridge collapse doesn’t present too many easy scapegoats — Pawlenty and Bush do severely fuck up everything they’re supposed to be in charge of managing, but America’s decaying infrastructure isn’t exactly the work of one or two men. No, years and years of work and lobbying went into ensuring that nothing would ever be repaired! AL explains how, after the jump.

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Could Be Worse, You Could Be Kitty

Wednesday, May 2nd, 2007

Every week, our Anonymous Lobbyist answers your questions about how laws get made and why they probably shouldn’t. If you have a question about the dirty business of doing business in Washington, ask her.

This week: how do know, really know, when the time is right?

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Ask a Lobbyist: God is a Concept by Which We Measure Our Contributions

Wednesday, April 25th, 2007

Every week, our Anonymous Lobbyist answers your questions about how laws get made and why they probably shouldn’t. If you have a question about the dirty business of doing business in Washington, ask her.

This week: people of all races, creeds, and colors, working together to buy you your own congressman.

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Ask a Lobbyist: Define ‘Fraud’

Wednesday, April 18th, 2007

Every week, our Anonymous Lobbyist answers your questions about how laws get made and why they probably shouldn’t. If you have a question about the dirty business of doing business in Washington, ask her.

This week: a trip to the hate-mail folder!

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Ask a Lobbyist: …Only Outlaws Would Lobby

Wednesday, April 11th, 2007

Every week, our Anonymous Lobbyist answers your questions about how laws get made and why they probably shouldn’t. If you have a question about the dirty business of doing business in Washington, ask her.

This week: Big old people have had their mouths at the public teat for too long.

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