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Hero Gets ‘All Riled Up’ On Fox News And Beer, Burns Mosque
It is plainly obvious that Christians are being hate-crushed in these United States, having their beliefs beaten out of them by godless demons and Muslims, who are not godless demons but do worship one. It’s more than just Christmas, too — there’s obviously that whole thing about how pizza-delivery men are not allowed to take [...]
What Are Humble Followers Of Jesus Burning To The Ground Today?
A portly neckbearded gentleman with a pink shirt and a blowtorch sets fire to a box of Honey Nut Cheerios to show General Mills that he does not care for its gay-friendly policies. It does not go quite as brilliantly as he planned, thanks to wind and highly flammable sugar. But what else has been [...]
Is Florida’s Pretty Lt. Gov. Lady Having Lesbionic Interracial Affair With Aide?
That’s a good question, in that headline right there up above here, that you just read. It comes to us via the court filings of a lady who worked for Florida’s lieutenant governor, Jennifer Carroll, and who is now on trial for sharing secret tape recordings with a reporter. She says, and we believe this [...]
Arkansas Sets Fire To Devil NPR Station
An unknown arsonist broke into the transmitter building of NPR affiliate KUAR in Little Rock on Saturday and briefly liberated the slave state’s airwaves from such Devil’s programming as jazz “music” (no banjos?) and Garrison Keillor. “Saturday around 5:30 p.m., the KUAR transmitter went off the air. Nathan Vandiver, who was on duty, notified Tom [...]
Dead Michael Jackson Is Finally Placed Underground, With All The Other Deads
FINALLY: Famous dead Jackson, Michael Jackson, was buried in the ground outside Los Angeles last night. [New York Times] Some Obama cabinet members, like America’s Vice President Joe Biden, are hesitant about sending more troops to Afghanistan, while other people are not hesitant at all about doing this. A nation waits for George Will’s “tiebreaker.” [...]
Senate Burns, Bush Issues Emergency Decree
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