arrest
Utah Gun Lobby Guy Might Lose All His Weapons Just For Threatening To Murder Some Folks Or Whatever
Freedom, where have you gone? Why has careful gun steward Clark Aposhian had his weapon seized by notorious Second Amendment haters (Utah cops) just for, like, doing some domestic violence (ALLEGEDLY) at his ex and her husband, and being a total (ALLEGED) screamy violent psycho? And how is he supposed to do his dayjob of [...]
Head Of Air Force Sexual Assault Unit Loves To ALLEGEDLY Sexually Assault Strange Women In Parking Lots
Oh, Air Force. Oh, Lieutenant Colonel Jeffrey Krusinski, chief of the Air Force’s sexual assault prevention and response branch. You have been arrested for (ALLEGEDLY) getting drunk and grabbing the tits and ass of a woman you did not even know in a parking lot. And yet it is in fact your job to prevent [...]
CNN Reporters Looking A Bit Glum Over Epically Messing Their Bed On Boston Bombing (Video)
UPDATE! Now with video stolen from Mediaite! CNN, after spending almost an hour getting more and more frenzied while trumpeting its scoop that law enforcement had identified a suspect and had either arrested that suspect or were on the verge of arresting that suspect, just had the terrible misfortune of having to retract its entire [...]
‘I’m Not Crazy,’ Says Nevada Gun-Threat Pol In Shirtless Interview, ‘You’re The One Who’s Crazy’
Nevada Assemblyman Steven Brooks (a Democrat!) did not threaten to murder Nevada Speaker Marilyn Kirkpatrick with a loaded gun that he was carrying, said Nevada Assemblyman Steven Brooks. Instead, Nevada Speaker Marilyn Kirkpatrick is trying to kill him! What else should we know about Brooks’s interview with the Las Vegas Review-Journal? A) It was “disjointed.” [...]
Will NRA Agree This Assemblyman Should Not Have A Gun? Probably, He Is A Democrat
Nevada Assemblyman Steven Brooks is in jail for threatening to shoot his fellow Democrat, Speaker Marilyn Kirkpatrick, with the loaded gun he was carrying. We are assuming this will be the first case of the NRA and Gun Owners of America agreeing that this law-abiding citizen should not have access to a gun!
Oh Whoops, Add ‘Assaulted A Stewardess’ To Charges Against Rand Paul’s Drunky Underage Son (Updated!)
Hey ladies! When we reported on Rand Paul’s drunky underage son’s pre-11 a.m. bout of airplane awesomeness, we somehow missed that he was also charged with assaulting a stew! Whoops!
Rand Paul’s Drunky Underage Son Arrested For Being Too Awesome
What’s up, “William Hilton Paul,” if that even is your real name? (What, “Ramada” was taken?) Oh, you just got hauled off from the airport to the pokey for being too rad? Let us examine, together, your charges: When the plane landed about 10:49 a.m., Paul was charged with consuming beer/wine underage, disorderly conduct and [...]
Rhode Island GOP Lawmaker Turns Out To Be Wanted Fugitive
Massachusetts has discovered a new place to try to hunt down its wanted criminals: the Rhode Island state legislature! It seems kind of obvious in retrospect, only because the Ocean State is kind of a sad, drug-addled dump from what we hear. Rep. Daniel Gordon Jr. was arrested in Rhode Island for failing to appear in Massachusetts [...]
John Kerry’s Drunk Daughter Busted In Hollywood
Oh jeez we will have to rewrite this lede to cover the (allegedly!) drunken Democrats who will all be arrested in Hollywood every night until Jesus’ birthday and the New Year are safely behind us: “It’s the holiday season, which means the Northern Virginia suburbs Hollywood are is going to be particularly deadly until January [...]
Dick Lugar’s Drunk Wife Crashes Into Parked Car
It’s the holiday season, which means the Northern Virginia suburbs are going to be particularly deadly until January 3 or so, as Republican congresspeople and their drunken wives and rent boys wreak havoc on the icy suburban streets. Congratulations to Charlene Lugar, wife of Republican Senator Dick Lugar, for winning the “First of the Season” [...]
Levi’s Mom Gets Arrested, Of Course, Because There Is Nothing Better To Do In Wasilla
As approximately 15 bajillion tipsters have excitedly emailed us, Sarah Palin’s daughter’s soon-to-be-baby-daddy’s mom has been arrested for something having to do with drugs. On the one hand, this is totally non-news, because trashy white ladies get arrested every day for — well, whatever Sherry Johnston was arrested for, nobody’s saying. Dealing pot? Cooking meth? [...]
Louisiana Democrat Arrested For Thug Crime!
A famous national Democratic leader, “State Sen. Derrick Shepherd, D-Marrero,” in Louisiana, has been arrested for … well, we can’t really figure out what for, exactly, but it involves lap dancers, in his house, plus maybe his mom and sister? Punching an ex-girlfriend in the stomach, after breaking into her house? Oh, and he is [...]
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