Tag: arkansas

How To Talk To Your Kids About Trump

To prepare them for a Trump presidency, teachers should tell kids crying is weak. SAD.
This election is going better than 2008, we think.

Let’s Celebrate Hillary Clinton’s Birthday, By Watching Her LOL At Donald Trump!

Let's see how Hillary Clinton is spending her 69th birthday!
What could they possibly be trying to distract from?

Guess Matt Drudge Forgot He Already Admitted ‘Bill Clinton’s Love Child’ Story Was Bunk. Huh!

Does Matt Drudge have Alzheimer's? We are just asking questions!
Professional cum-sock.

Texas Attorney General Will Save North Carolina From Transgender Pee-Pee Monsters

Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton is sticking his dumb nose in where it doesn't belong, again.
Sadly, the prisoners today tend not to be Gentlemen like Mr. Pickwick

Arkansas Judge: There’s No ‘I Have Pancreatic Cancer’ In Debtors’ Prison

An Arkansas city is being sued for using its courts as a system for extracting revenue from poor people. But if it didn't, it might have to raise taxes, and how is that fair?
What are we supposed to do with these finger puppets? What are 'fingers' anyway?

Wonkagenda: Thursday, August 25, 2016

You get in here and read your news brief, RIGHT NOW!

Christian Store Owner Terrorized By Lesbians Holding Hands (Like They Do In Strip Clubs)

Steve Salyers, devout Christian and owner of Arkansas flea market Spa City Treasures, had his faith assaulted this past Saturday when a lesbian couple entered his store and -- brace yourselves -- held hands there. Right inside the store,...
NOPE!

Ted Cruz Just Wants To Help GOP Senate Buddies But They’re All Busy Washing Their Hair

Republican senators don't seem to want Ted Cruz's 'help' getting re-elected. Weird!
blood meridian 2015

Walmart Knows Where It Wants Trans Folks To Make Toilet, But Shhhhhh, It’s A Secret!

Walmart doesn't have the stones to say where boys without stones or girls with them should drop their kids off at the pool.

Target Doesn’t Need None Of You Dumb Bigots’ Business, So BYE FELICIA

Gay-hatin' wingnuts, Target has some bad news for you.

Arkansas Perv Judge Resigns To Spend More Time Sex-Spanking White Boys, Probably

So we've got spanky-spanky, sexual favors, child porn, anything else to make sure this guy goes down in the history books as just a really great judge?
Guys with beards this epic are either brilliant or fucking nuts

Arkansas Gentleman In Jail Just For Loving Bible Too Much, Threatening To Kill Seven Mayors

Guy who threatened seven mayors insisted that learning the 10 Commandments along with his ABCs made him the man he is today. Hmm.

Donald Trump Suddenly Part Of Arkansas Senate Race, Maybe

Who'd have figured Donald Trump would become a pivotal issue in the Arkansas Senate race?

Mr. Tuff Guy Sen. Tom Cotton Didn’t Drink Gay Sparkle Water When He Was At ‘Army’

Y'all, the child senator from Arkansas, Tom Cotton, is mad enough to tittyfuck a swallow right now! Surprise, it has to do with how Cotton still thinks he's the president of Obama's Iran foreign policy. Surprise, Tom Cotton is...

Gov. Nikki Haley Not Entirely Sure Why Y’all Gotta Be Such Bigots

It is a day in America, which means it's time to tell you about some new bullshit anti-LGBT legislation. Republican state Senator Lee Bright of South Carolina has introduced a bill (S. 1203) to make sure none of those big scary...

Sen. Tom Cotton So Glad America Chose Him To Usurp Tyrant King Barack Obama

<a href="http://wonkette.com/599725/lets-meet-obamas-sexxxy-silver-fox-scotus-nominee-merrick-garland"></a>Sen. Tom Cotton opened his Arkansan mouth anus again, and what came out was unsurprising. Yes, the babyfaced pig trough of a man who thought, as a brand new perky Republican senator from Arkansas, that it was his...