If you’re a former ballet dancer with a hot temper and nine and a half fingers, you’re probably glad to see that this Rahm Emanuel fellow came along. If he can make it, so can you! Emanuel also has two brothers, Zeke and Ari, with whom you might have more in common than you might think. Take Wonkette’s Official Emanuel Brother Diagnostic Personality Test and find out! MORE »

• Liz Smith: Reading about Wednesday’s screening of Woody Allen’s latest, Scoop, we learned that Capote director Bennett Miller may make a Bob Dylan music video with Scarlett Johansson. [NYP]
• Reliable Source: Bob Casey Jr. returns a $2,100 campaign contribution from Dan Savage because of “the frothy mix of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct of anal sex.” The Casey campaign took the money, invited Savage to a fundraiser, then changed their minds. [WP]
• Page Six: Ex-Paris Review Editor James Linville is making Ernest Hemingway’s elusive The Garden of Eden into a movie. “Linville was a longtime protégé of the Review’s George Plimpton, who himself was mentored by ‘Papa.’” [NYP]
• LA Times Entertainment News: Fake movie “Aquaman” on HBO’s Entourage might become a real movie. “In one of the strangest twists of this life-imitating-art tale, the talent agent at the center of the informal ‘Aquaman’ talks is Ari Emanuel, the brassy Endeavor partner on whom ‘Entourage’ agent Ari Gold is based.” [LAT]

• Reliable Source: Bush’s chances of being on jury duty are zero. . . Rep. Rahm Emanuel (D-Ill.) tears ligament playing touch-football with Tim McGraw, Faith Hill, Garry Shandling, and his brother, agent Ari Emanuel. [WP]
• Page Six: Barbara Bush spotted buying $300 pair of Beja Boots. [NYP] MORE »

• Names & Faces: Michael Brown hid behind a newspaper as he slipped into the NuYu salon and spa yesterday for a scalp massage and haircut. [WP]
• Under the Dome: Lawmakers beat lobbyists in two basketball games. . . Two “Real World” roommates headline Gulf Coast fundraiser; Senators Wayne Allard and Ted Stevens will attend. [The Hill]
• Lloyd Grove’s Lowdown: Condoleeza Rice to O’Reilly: “I’ve been black all my life. Nobody needs to tell me how to be black.” [NYDN]
• Page Six: Lewinsky says goodbye to New York, hello to London: “Maybe I will meet my husband there