Tag: argh

Sad Pundits: Why Won’t Insiders Tell Us Who Will Win The Election?

THIS ELECTION, YOU GUYS! It is ... confusing? Like, some people say that Barack Obama will win re-election, while others say that his opponent, Mitt Romney, will prevail! WHO ARE WE TO TRUST? Normally, of course,...

Hooray, Global Markets Collapse Again Because of … Greece! (Again)

Let's check in with the Wonkette Business Desk for our morning economic roundup. U.S. pending home sales are at their highest point this year! U.S. manufacturing orders are at a two-year high! A terrorist plot against New York --...

Goddamned Stock Markets Keep Plunging

Whoa, jesus, the Dow's down 500 points, again. What's the newest bad news for everybody? People have quit going to the stores, to buy stuff! There are many signs that your job will soon be gone, if you've still...