anderson cooper
CNN Reporters Looking A Bit Glum Over Epically Messing Their Bed On Boston Bombing (Video)
UPDATE! Now with video stolen from Mediaite! CNN, after spending almost an hour getting more and more frenzied while trumpeting its scoop that law enforcement had identified a suspect and had either arrested that suspect or were on the verge of arresting that suspect, just had the terrible misfortune of having to retract its entire [...]
Yeah, No, Seriously, Los Angeles Spree-Killer Cop Is Really, *REALLY* Liberal
We have already read about what made Los Angeles spree-killin’ cop Christopher Dorner go Django on the entire LAPD (and their families). It was LAPD racisms. So we know who (and what) he hates. But who does he love? Just about all your typical libtards, like Hillary Clinton and Larry David and Ellen Degeneres and [...]
Teh Year in Ghey: A Wonktrospective
It has been a banner fucking year for the teh gheys. There was tons of election-winning, gay-marrying, company-wrecking, and general ruining of morals and common decency everywhere. Shockingly, we learned that a lesbian cabal runs the DHS, because when the revolution comes it will damn sure start with ‘mos taking over executive agencies. We watched [...]
Anderson Cooper To Whistleblower: Why Do You Want To Hurt Those Nice Banks?
Well that was fast! The media has already, as Hamilton Nolan astutely predicted, turned on Greg Smith, the former Goldman Sachs analyst turned writer. You might remember Greg Smith from the scathing Op-Ed he wrote in the New York Times back in April, announcing his resignation from Goldman Sachs and revealing that their corporate culture [...]
Newt Gingrich: It Is Okay For Mitt Romney To Lie If It Is In A Political Ad, Yeah Sure Why Not?
Does rubber-lipped diamond-humper Newt Gingrich think it is awesome for Mitt Romney to flat-out lie in his advertisement about Obama (not) dropping the welfare-to-work requirements in waivers to the states? Sure it is awesome. It’s a political ad, you can’t expect people to tell the truth when they only have 30 seconds! Did Newt Gingrich [...]
Anderson Cooper Admits He Is Attracted to Men, Not The Other People
CNN hurricane guy Anderson Cooper, whom a full 100% of the American population has witnessed making out with dudes at one point or another, has an announcement! “The fact is, I’m gay, always have been, always will be, and I couldn’t be any more happy, comfortable with myself, and proud.” Being rich is nice, too. [...]
Your Morning Braintrust: Of Course Those Gays Should Be In The Pen So No More Gay Babies Can Be Born
Towleroad, having brought us the original “let’s round up the queers and put them behind an electric fence until they die,” follows up with this extraordinarily delightful video of Anderson Cooper — hmmmm! — explaining to this mean dumb cow about where gay babies come from, and also The Holocaust. She ain’t changin’ her mind, [...]
Palin Might Run For President Because Of Raging Non-Limbaugh Misogynists
Sarah Palin went on — or should we say, was transmitted through someone’s phone-toy in the direction of — CNN during Tuesday’s Super Snoozeday parade, and proclaimed that who knows whether she’ll run for president today, tomorrow, or after the Mayan apocalypse, but anything is possible because Americans can do anything they put their minds [...]
CNN Fires Eliot Spitzer For Boring Everyone To Death
Eliot Spitzer is unemployed again, because ratings on his terrible CNN solo talk show “In the Arena” have repeatedly indicated that America is not interested in watching Spitzer sex himself on teevee. What about if Eliot Spitzer pays America to watch? Would she do it then? No, gross, just please go away. We have never [...]
CNN Accuses Newt Gingrich of Making ‘Past Discretions’
According to the Anderson Cooper teevee show on Friday, Newt Gingrich has committed “discretions” in his past. This is a serious revelation! We, and Republican voters everywhere, demand CNN release evidence Newt Gingrich has ever exercised good judgment. EVEN IF IT HAPPENED ONCE, THAT SHOULD DISQUALIFY HIM FROM THE NOMINATION. [thanks to Wonkette operative "Benton" [...]
Anderson Cooper Falls For the Old ‘Apes Say Put On a Bunny Suit’ Trick
Kids, do you like the journalism? Of course not. You don’t even know what it is. But if you did, you might think it’s a respectable way to make a living. You would, of course, be wrong about that, too. Consider poor little rich boy Anderson Cooper, who actually worked hard for many years as [...]
Anderson Cooper Gets Daytime Talk Show, Ladies
Anderson Cooper is keeping his job at CNN, at least until Larry King shows up at his studios with a gun and Cooper decides it’s no longer worth it to interview terror-baby activists and hilarious homophobe assistant attorneys general. But he is also getting a daytime talk show, because why not? You know how Anderson [...]
Mich. Assistant AG Has Awkward, Sexually Charged TeeVee Talk
Andrew Shirvell is Michigan’s assistant attorney general, a University of Michigan alum, and absolutely 100 percent heterosexual, according to his Facebook page, which lists one of his interests as “Finding the Right Lady” and includes a picture of him touching a human female! While he’s not busy assisting the real attorney general, he does normal, [...]
Anderson Cooper Doesn’t Believe In Exploding Terror Babies
Terror babies are a fun new terrorism flavor of anchor babies, apparently. Or perhaps they’re a spin-off of Muppet Babies. It’s hard to tell because this is such a GAPING HOLE and needs to be yelled about at Anderson Cooper’s face.
Meet Debbie Riddle, Terror Baby Expert
Texas state house representative Debbie Riddle went on CNN to talk to Anderson Cooper about “ill-iggles” immigrating here unlawfully, and brought up the latest threat to America: the TERROR BABIES. Terror babies are even more terrifying than standard-issue anchor babies, because their foreigner moms come here to America specifically to birth them, haul them back [...]
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