Wonkette

We missed it yesterday during non-stop Cocktober Surprise coverage, but there’s an update on our old, busted perv from last week: MORE »

• Heard on the Hill: Dumb employee of Rep. Charles Bass (R-NH) trolled blogs on House computers, pretending to be a liberal. [Roll Call]
• Yeas and Nays: Exclusive “supper club” to host exclusive parties featuring same 200 idiots at every other exclusive party… 12-year-old wins essay contest. [Examiner]
• Reliable Source: Pseudonymous PG County erotica author invents “freak dating.” Tonight at Zanzibar… Amy Argetsinger and Roxanne Roberts did not get into any sororities. [WP]
• Washington Whispers: Behold the terrifying vision of Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi: “look for lots of flowers, bowls of San Francisco’s Ghirardelli chocolate, and good art mixed in with photos of her grandkids. What’s more, meeting-goers would be greeted with fruit and muffins for breakfast, sandwiches for lunch, and maybe a sit-down dinner at her Georgetown condo at night”… “CNN’s Wolf Blitzer has nailed so many star newsmakers lately that we haven’t had a chance to watch his competitors. ‘Oh yes, Wolf is hot and having fun,’ says a CNN exec.” [USN&WR]
• Page Six: Authors of anti-Ann Coulter book remain anonymous, because they are pussies… Crappy NYU humor magazine gets inexplicable column inches for unfunny Bush piece. [NYP]
• Rush and Molloy: Nancy Grace: evil shrew and plagiarist. [NYDN]

Earlier today, we wondered why so many people were accessing this site by running Google searches for Amy Argetsinger, one of the two scribes behind the Post’s Reliable Source column. We asked: “Was Amy on TV earlier today? Did she hold up that Seven Eleven near the Braddock Road Metro station? Why the sudden curiosity about her?” MORE »

We’ve started compiling celebrity sightings for this week’s installment of Wonk’d, and we seem to have a grand total of four. Yes, that’s right: four. The Reliable Source gals* sometimes have that many sightings in a single day. Boy do we feel pathetic. MORE »

In case you haven’t noticed, around here we have an obsession with Amy Argetsinger and Roxanne Roberts, who write the Post’s Reliable Source column. (Heck, we even sent them a Valentine’s Day card.) Perhaps it’s because they’re a lot like us: a pair of wild ‘n crazy, gossip-obsessed Washingtonians — except they have 401(k) plans, a spiffy new gym, and breasts. MORE »

Sometimes, our sources can be too reliable. This afternoon, we received an email from one of our bestest pals, Amy Argetsinger. MORE »

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* Reliable Source: After much anticipation — namely by Amy Argetsinger and Roxanne Roberts — Sen. John McCain made his cameo halfway through last night’s “24″. . . Scheduler for Sen. Jeff Sessions has been “dealt with” following post of “provocative photo” online. . . Jordan’s King Abdullah spotted at Georgetown Safeway. [WP]
* Under the Dome: Brian Williams confused Sen. Barak Obama with Rep. Harold Ford during State of the Union broadcast. . . Rep. John Conyers (D-Mich.) hawks hardcover version of “The Constitution in Crisis” report with a introduction by Joe Wilson. . . Colin Powell sings “Happy Birthday” to opera singer. . . Liam Neeson and Holly Hunter play the Lincolns in Library of Congress production. [The Hill]
* Inside the Beltway: Rep. John Dingell (D-Mich.) is the longest-serving House member. [WT]

• Reliable Source: Steven Spielberg hired Mike McCurry to build beltway buzz about “Munich”. . . Dedicated reader counts the number of exclamation points used by Amy Argetsinger and Roxanne Roberts. [WP]

• The Nationals’ stadium isn’t Anthony Williams’ baby, it’s Rosemary’s. Major League Baseball reaches new depths of depravity, soul-sucking evil. [DCist] MORE »

We asked you people how you thought Lucky Strike’s local media bowling challenge would play out and have received…well…let’s call it “many” predictions:

•The reporters from the Post will cheat, then write a thousand word rumination about falling standards of integrity in the bowling world.
•George Will, in the end, is too blue-blooded to deign to be caught bowling, even at Lucky Strike.
•The staff of the Washingtonian just won’t be able to get over how fun! and original! and cheap! this sport is! They will decide to go bowling several times a year, and always in the exact same way.
•Dana Milbank bowls a 75, because he is a pussy.
•The Examiner’s will be escorted out of the bowling alley when no one agrees to vouch for whether or not they are a media outlet. [I'd be surprised, actually, if they could deal with a game that requires them to use a black ball to knock over white pins. --Ed.]
•The Washington Times staff will get drunk, then start suspiciously eyeing any hispanics working at the alley.
•and of course, Cokie Roberts will bring her own ball, natch.

Wonkette’s predictions, after the jump:

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We’d like to welcome Roxanne Roberts and Amy Argetsinger to the Washington gossip world on this, the debut of their joint-bylined (”twice the gossip-power”!) “Reliable Source.” They jumped out of the gate awfully fast after being hired barely a month ago, leading with a piece on the quasi-possible-maybe-potential Senate candidacy of Ben Affleck, exclaiming “If you liked him as Bennifer . . . you’ll love him as Benator!” (Perhaps, though we suspect Ben Nelson will be pissed.) The debut is made all the more impressive by the inclusion of an on-the-record quote from the reclusive Larry Sabato. As Jackie Harvey might say: Item! MORE »

After the jump: The official announcement of the new Reliable Source(s), Posties Amy Argetsinger and Roxanne Roberts. At least they will have an excuse to write in first person plural.

Note: The most excellent thing about not being named the Reliable Source ourselves will be our continued pleasure in mocking the WP Style section. Good luck, girls. We’ll be gentle. At first.

RELATED: Post Goes Back to Double Byline in Reviving Reliable Source [Washingtonian]”

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