alberto gonzales
Alberto Gonzales Offers Totally Hypothetical Example Of How To Investigate, Say, A Leaked CIA Agent’s Name
Well, this is … this is … we don’t even … FUCK! So, there is a bit of kerfuffle and a hullabaloo about the Department of Justice getting a very narrow slice of two months’ worth of phone records from AP while investigating a leak. For context, Fox News has asked for Alberto Gonzales’s thoughts [...]
Bush Administration Never Did Anything Bad, It Turns Out
We already know that nobody who worked for George W. Bush ever committed any kind of war crimes or did anything illegal in starting the Iraq War, because surely if they had the Democrats who control the Congress and the White House would have done something about it. Now we also learn that, when all [...]
‘AL’ GONZALES FIXED MOST THINGS: From one of those fancy New York Esquire interviews, where it’s all answers, no questions: “This may sound egotistical, but to me it is important that when I leave this earth, I would have made a difference — that people would know Al Gonzales lived, he touched lives, he made [...]
Professor Alberto Gonzales Already Terrifying Students
Former Bush White House counsel and Mexican attorney general Alberto Gonzales is balls-deep into his professorial duties for the semester at Texas Tech, where he teaches a “political science class on the Executive Branch” as an “easy A” for the football team. Here is what he is telling the students, as he puts it in [...]
Emails Suggest Rove Was Totally Up In This Attorney-Firing Business
The research goblins over at TPM and the New York Times are busy at work devouring thousands of pages of newly released documents regarding the US attorney firing scandal. At an undetermined point in the future, these specially evolved goblins will excrete a powdery white substance and several pages of “analysis,” or at least a [...]
Alberto Gonzales Finally Cons University Into Hiring Him
Former Bush White House counsel and Attorney General Alberto Gonzales — whose great political achievements include conspiring with John Yoo to destroy the U.S. Constitution with MEMOS, chasing down then-AG John Ashcroft in the hospital to get him to authorize illegal domestic warrantless wiretapping programs while he was hopped up on anesthetics, and firing tons [...]
Former Lawmakers Can’t Get A Job Either
Do not despair, jobless people! You’re not alone. Several members of Congress who lost their positions in the 2008 elections have yet to find gainful employment, and perennial loser Alberto Gonzales also remains at loose ends because George Bush was the only person left in America who would hire him.
Joe The Plumber Liked Journalist Camp In Gaza, Except For What He’s Pretty Sure Was Color War
Mexican urban legend Alberto Gonzales is unable to find a job and is comically blaming the recession for this. After Barack Obama redistributes the world’s wealth to atheist hobos, a dog is expected to have eaten Gonzales’ new job. [TPMMuckraker] Howard Dean is doing that thing again, on the Internet, in which he gets all [...]
Alberto Gonzales, War On Terror’s Latest Victim
During his tenure in office, George Bush created more than a housing bubble: he also fostered an “employment bubble” for high-functioning idiots, who were awarded fancy jobs in his administration and have since departed in shame and ignominy. Exhibit A: the hapless cretin, unemployed loser, and only Bush administration toady not to get a zillion [...]
Dick Cheney And Alberto Gonzales Indicted For ‘Prison Profiteering’
Well, it would be nice if these guys ever went to jail for anything, but it seems unlikely that they will go to jail for this. A grand jury in South Texas handed down indictments against various current and former public officials connected with wrongdoing in private prisons — including, most notably, Dick Cheney and [...]
YOU DON’T SAY: “The inspector general’s investigation found that Ms. Goodling and a handful of other senior aides to Mr. Gonzales developed a system of using in-person interviews and Internet searches to screen out candidates who might be too liberal and to identify candidates seen as pro-Republican and supportive of President Bush.” [New York Times]
America’s Best Attorney General Can’t Find Job!
Did Monica Goodling Fire Some Lesbian?
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