alaska

Open wide, Idaho, because we’re cramming some big gay homo marriage right down your throat! (Try relaxing your jaw and breathing through your nose.) Late Tuesday a federal judge in Boise struck down Idaho’s gay marriage ban, declaring a referendum passed in 2006 that enshrined the principle of one-heterosexual-man-one-heterosexual-woman marriage in the state constitution out […]

This post brought to you by the Patty Dumpling Endowed Blogging Chair For Oil Spill Clusterfucks. It’s been a quarter-century since the oil tanker Exxon Valdez spilled 11 million gallons of oil in the formerly known as pristine Prince William Sound, and here we are today still burning the earth’s toxic runny shits and farts for […]

Alaska state Sen. Pete Kelly is a Fairbanks Republican who knows what’s good for babies and other living things, and what he knows is that fetal alcohol syndrome (FAS) is a very bad thing. We actually agree with him on that, although we aren’t 100% sure he’s found the ideal way of addressing this very […]

In further evidence that The Obama Administration is full of elitists and Marie Antoinettes of the very worst sort, EPA Administrator Gina McCarthy brutally hurt the tender feelings of all Alaskans recently by saying in a Wall Street Journal article that a “little girl’s” (who wasn’t a little girl) heartfelt gift of a jar of […]

FRIDAY TWOFER OF SHAME! Part I: Scott Brown, that handsome former Senator fellow who once accused Elizabeth Warren of masquerading as a Red Indian, is expected to “launch an exploratory committee for a U.S. Senate bid in New Hampshire,” which is weird because we thought he already did something like that? And he drew a […]

Oh, Alaska. What did we do before we knew of your weird ways, thrown into harsh illumination on the national stage thanks to half-term grifterbilly Sarah Palin? If not for that fortuitous bit of happenstance, we would never be checking out an Alaska-based blog, and we would never have known about the Republican (of course!) […]

We have an exciting new entrant in our Cavalcade of Fringe Candidates, 2014 Edition! Yesterday, we brought you the satirical brilliance of Florida congressional hopeful Ilya Katz. Today, we go to the whole opposite corner of the continent to meet Kathleen Tonn, who’s running for the U.S. Senate in Alaska. She is very much the […]

Welcome, wonkeesters, to another edition of Derp Roundup, the weekly feature where we hose down the news, filter out the stories that weren’t quite worth a whole post but too stoopid to ignore altogether, spray the whole mess with cheap booze, and bring you the runoff. Enjoy! Our first story violates the entire premise of […]

Reince Priebus was lonely. So lonely. So on Tuesday he called up many of his reporter friends and demanded they listen to him about how the Republicans were going to launch the ad campaign to end all ad campaigns, the one that would destroy Obamacare forever and ever. And everyone paid attention to Reince, and […]

Feeling a bit low this Thanksgiving? A bit like something is just…missing? Could be because you have been waiting, longing, for Wonkette’s sort-of-annual Thanksgiving tradition. As a parade is to Macy’s, Sarah Palin’s interview-cum-turkey-slaughter-horror-show is to Wonkette. And really, what news story is more Wonkette-ish than Sarah Palin yammering on obliviously as turkeys are ground […]

With Halloween behind us, there is a crisp, fresh feeling in the air. The kind of feeling that can only mean one thing: time to start capitalizing on other people’s deeply held religi-political beliefs to rake in boatloads of cash. Up in the sky, with a sleigh being pulled by flying caribou, is our favorite […]

Snowbilly sperm donor Levi Johnston, that paragon of Alaskan manhood, filed a civil custody suit in Alaska against Bristol Palin on October 19. The Alaska judicial website doesn’t provide any details (dumb privacy laws), but presumably the suit will attempt to resolve the custody issues left hanging when the former couple’s previous case was dismissed […]

Sarah Palin’s ghostwriter really liked that “forget Syria, let’s bomb Obamacare” metaphor a couple weeks back, so they must have figured, why let it go? That’s our best guess at how we got this Breitbart column “by” Sarah Palin titled “Bombs Away on Obamacare; Cruz Is over the Target” (be warned — auto-play video at […]

How is Congress wasting everyone’s time today, besides all of the usual ways? Oh, here’s a good one: “Congress pushes EPA on giant Pebble mine.” No, not giant pebbles, which are just normal-sided rocks, after all; they mean the proposed Pebble mine, in Alaska, which is going to be a fucking disaster! This is a […]

Good news, America! Her ex-royal highness of the meth capital of Alaska and the poster child for why teaching “abstinence only” to your gaggle of children will just make you a grandma that much faster has deigned to make words that sound like she will maybe possibly consider thinking about potentially mulling an attempt at […]