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Tag: alabama

Why Do Hillary Clinton Press Conferences Hate White People So Much?

Ask Hillary if she's 'trustworthy' again. ASK HER, WE DARE YOU.

Alabama’s Richard Shelby, In Office A Million Years, May Be Glued To Seat: Your Senate Sunday

Alabama's Richard Shelby has been in the U.S. Senate since the Reagan administration. That seems about long enough, don't you think?
You want some withering sarcasm with that, hon?

Short On Lunch Money? Alabama Elementary School Gives Kids A PBJ And A Shame Stamp

An Alabama elementary school has a novel way of letting parents know their kids' lunch accounts are running low: they put a big black stamp on the kid's arm, reading 'I Need Lunch Money!' What's the big deal? It doesn't say 'Will Work For Food.'

Alabama Gay Marriage Judge Forced To Shove Gavel Up Haters’ Asses. Again.

Oh, Alabama, the state whose only claim to fame is that it's not Mississippi.

Gay-Hatin’ Alabama Chief Justice Reckons He Could Use Some Civil Rights Right About Now

Don't you all know Roy Moore is being persecuted by the homosexuals, which is unfair and not at all Christlike?

Attorney General Loretta Lynch ‘Bout To Have To Smack A Bunch More States Upside Their Heads

Oh look, a whole posse of bigot states are joining together to say 'EW TRANS PEOPLE'!

Alabama Chief Justice Roy Moore Suspended For ‘Bad At Law.’ Here Is A Sexxx Song About Him!

Judy Rogers is your new favorite contemporary Christian artist. Also, Roy Moore got suspended for telling the Supreme Court it's not the boss of him. (It is.)

Dumb Alabama Town Decides Not To Jail Transgenders For Pooping At Their Local Target

The "No Doo Doos For Transgenders" ordinance is dead!
My Little Pony: Friendship is a Plot to Take Away Our Liberty

Deleted Comments Of The Week: Watch Fox And Free Yourself From Propaganda

Funny how the Deleted Comments biz goes. A couple weeks back, we had so few real winners that we had to forego the feature altogether; this week, we'll have to select carefully from a veritable smorgasbord of Derp. So...

Alabama Chief Justice Roy Moore Wishes Godless Gaywads Would Stop Pickin’ On Him

Roy Moore, chief justice of the Alabama Supreme Court, is a magnificent buffoon. You 'member him. He's the justice who's been standing in the courthouse door, trying to block the big gay U.S. Supreme Court from throatcramming his precious Alabammy...

Inbred Alabama Hicks Can’t Even Spell Why They Hate Transgenders So Much

There is a town called OXFORD, Alabama, and it sounds like the town council/shootin' range/squirrel recipe dispensary needs an OXFORD English Dictionary, because boy howdy, let us tell you about these dumb motherfuckers. The City Council is so mad about...

Alabama Legislators Cleverly Devise Foolproof Plan To Ban All The Abortions

State legislators in Alabama have a dream. A beautiful dream to ban all the abortion in their state! For today they vote on whether or not to put a referendum on the state ballot which will allow voters to...
He feels just awful about all this, no more questions

Horndog Ol’ Alabama Gov. Robert Bentley Had Sex Chats With God, All Is Forgiven

a href="http://wonkette.com/600056/listen-to-alabama-governor-talk-about-touching-dirty-pillows-of-not-his-wife">Alabama Gov. Robert Bentley would like you all to just hush up now about all the sexxytimes he didn't have with his chief political advisor (and not-wife), Rebekah Caldwell Mason, because he and the LORD have talked it...

Elizabeth Warren Castrates Trump, David Brooks Still Sucks. It’s Your Weekly Top Ten!

Oh hey, Wonkettigentsia, what are you doing? Hmmmm, OK not sure we're interested in hearing about how sexy it is to collect stamps and magnets with your cats, so we'll just pretend you didn't understand that for the rhetorical...

Alabama Governor Didn’t Bone That Lady, Sexism Boned That Lady!

Oh great, now it's time to hear from the woman Republican Alabama Gov. Robert Bentley DID NOT have physical relations with. Honest! He may have penis-lusted after her in his brain, but he did not brain-lust her with his...

Alabama Governor Sorry For Boning Chick He Totally Didn’t Bone, Wink Wink

Did Republican Alabama Gov. Robert Bentley make bone-sexes with a young adviser lady what was not his wife? MAYBE! Is he sorry for making the sex-boners, even though he says he did not have a "physical affair" with that...