al gore
Let’s see, climate change is a horrific ongoing disaster and it’s caused by human-made machinery farting out fossil fuel smoke and anusburger cows farting out actual cow farts, and your grandchildren will be Diabetic Sea Monkeys living deep beneath the glowing nuclear sea of the Great Gulf Lake of Mississippi-Canada, if they survive the Eugenics [...]
American voters now agree that an Al Gore presidency would’ve hardly been different from the disastrous eight-year reign of George W. Bush and Dick Cheney. See, we really have learned some stuff from Barack Obama! The latest weird Vanity Fair/CBS News poll of random questions proves that 56% of our people say a Gore-Lieberman White [...]
Keith Olbermann is expected to announce his new teevee home base sometime today, and many teevee experts believe he will join Current TV, the “public affairs channel” that Al Gore invented to help spread liberal Sharia. And now that Keith isn’t oppressed by the MSNBC Corporate Yoke, he can finally tell the news the way [...]
Back when he was a member of the House, Sen. Mark Kirk (R-IL) was one of a few Republicans who voted for a far-reaching climate change bill. That legislation quickly fueled Tea Party rage, and conservatives went on the attack against the plan’s backers. So Kirk did an about face on the issue, and now [...]
Have you registered for classes yet at the Carson-Gore Academy of Environmental Sciences, the brand new Los Angeles school named in honor of Al Gore’s pet polar bear, Carson? Well if you haven’t, DON’T! Turns out Al Gore’s Internet college was constructed atop a giant mound of toxic soil. This is funny to wingnut bloggers [...]
It’s probably not very much fun to split up with your wife of 75 years and then have the Huffington Post say you’ve been cheating with Larry David’s wife and then have some masseuse in Oregon claim, to the National Enquirer, that you tried to practice your love on her three years ago when she [...]
The tabloids would have you believe that Al Gore wanted some masseuse person to touch his genitals one time years ago, but a respectable magazine, People, does not believe this, as they heard from one of Tipper Gore’s friends that she doesn’t believe it happened. “And they also say Al had an affair with a [...]
Police in Portland have announced they are re-re-opening the investigation into that time Al Gore allegedly groped a masseuse at a hotel four years ago. Third time’s the charm when it comes to cock-grabbing incidents, apparently. As for Gore, did you expect him to offer No Comment on this? YOU GUESSED WRONG. Al Gore is [...]
Really? Did Al Gore try to get some 54-year-old masseuse gal to massage his dingus at a Portland hotel where he was staying to give a Climate Change speech, and when the woman showed no interest did he then get angry and demand she have sex with him? Is Al Gore supposed to be the [...]
Whoa, forget the oil spill, here is some tabloid sexytime gossip about Al Gore: The Star reports tonight that Gore has been having a sex affair for two years with Laurie David, the environmental activist and ex-wife of teevee grouch Larry David. Is this true? Well it was true about another southern politician who wanted [...]
Karenna Gore, famous daughter of just-separated Al & Tipper Gore, is splitting up with her husband of 13 years. She married Andrew Schiff in 1997 and they have three little kids, whose lives will now be ruined. (Haha you know when parents split up because they’re selfish yuppies and they say, “Oh the kids are [...]
Did you really believe that Al and Tipper Gore were full-on IN LURVE during those 40 long years of marital blissin’ and kissin’? Well boy howdy, they sure got one over on you, says a new investigative opinion piece published by Eyewitness AOL.com. Hm, how did AOL News discover that the Gores were sham-married all [...]
Whoa we were just stopping by MSNBC for a moment to watch the Israeli Ambassador lie about killing people again, and then what’s her name, Alan Greenspan’s wife, just cold started showing pictures of Al and Tipper Gore dressed up as sex monsters for orgies. What is going on here? Oh right, it was the [...]
How much will we miss “America’s President,” the sore-loserman Al Gore and his wife Tipper Gore, who are becoming separated today due to the lack of love in their lives? Let’s all gather around the laptop and remember the years of joy and kissing and complaining about Prince records and “lockbox” and whatever else they [...]
