Al Franken is like the best Senator ever, maybe. Here he talking for seven minutes yesterday about his amendment to a defense appropriations bill that would defund KBR (Halliburton) or any other contractor that forces its employees to waive their rights to criminal or civil cases when they get abused or — as was the case of one KBR employee in Iraq — gang-raped by their co-workers. The amendment passed, 68-30! Thirty Republican males voted against it. They thought Al Franken was just being mean to Halliburton because of Dick Cheney and politics. DID YOU KNOW THAT AL FRANKEN USED TO BE A COMEDIAN, AND NOW HE’S A SENATOR? It’s true. [Think Progress]

This one goes out to all the readers with attention spans, because what we’ve got here is an informative ten-minute video about public policy. There must be at least three or four humans out there who… like to learn about policies before making up their minds on them?? It’s a gamble. But what a lovely video! Some teabaggers in Minnesota were apparently seeking to “ambush” Al Franken at a Minnesota fair recently, probably assuming he would just shout liberal rape jokes back at them, because HE WAS A COMEDIAN, AND NOW HE’S A SENATOR?? WACKY. But the confrontation goes much differently, and America is saved forever. [Dusty Trice]

Everyone has been wondering when Al Franken, the comedian who therefore is not smart but gets to be a Senator anyway, would stop pretending to care about “political issues” already — his 20-year campaign is over! — and just go nuts shouting insane Playboy rape jokes, constantly, in Judiciary Committee meetings. And at yesterday’s Sotomayor hearing he did, technically, tell his First Joke in the Senate, a snoozy little ice-breaker for the nation’s grandmothers about how teevee lawyer Perry Mason was hardly the best lawyer of his time, oh ho ho. Then he asked some serious questions… but it was too late! The world’s “most important governing body” is NO PLACE FOR VERBAL HUMOR, some nut writes in The Hill. MORE »

TODAY WAS A COMPLETE WASTE OF THE U.S. SENATE JUDICIARY COMMITTEE’S TIME, AND AN INSULT TO BASEBALL AND AMERICA: So many times today your Wonkette editors have prepared to write posts about the Sotomayor hearings, but it all just sucks too much, these people reading their pieces of paper. Maybe we should post a clip of the heckler interrupting Al Franken’s first hearing speech? How about no! Where is all the VIOLENCE? Anyway, this clip is the best distillation on the entire Internet of today’s evil Opening Statement Marathon. (Thanks, John Roberts!) [Gawker]

The newly installed stooge/senator from Minnesota, veteran circus performer Al Franken, had to wait, what, eight months to assume office? And during that time he frittered away many an hour in court, wasting the People’s Money on the frivolous lawsuit that was eventually decided in his favor. Norm Coleman warned him from the very beginning that The People would not look kindly on this frivolity and wasteful spending! Which is why it’s funny that Minnesota’s Republican Party has had to cut Franken a check for $96,000 to cover lawsuit-related fees. MORE »

Senator James Inhofe recently unleashed on Al Franken the most foul insult a short, liberal Jew from Minnesota can ever hope to hear: he called him a clown. And Franken took it like a gentleman, but you could tell he was mortally offended. MORE »

Here’s Joe Biden swearing in Al Franken to the Senate today, finally, while failed adult Norm Coleman plays Foosball in his parents’ basement, alone, sobbing. Now the Democrats officially have 60 votes in the Senate! EVERYONE GO GAY-MOLEST A CHILD, NOW. [TPM]

What kind of a so-called “comedian” is this soon-to-be Senator Al Franken, that he shows up in Washington D.C. without a fright wig and refuses to fake-hump Harry Reid during his first press conference in town? He was resolutely quiet and unfunny during the whole recount, which started, hmm, back in the Carter era, and now he is still not funny and WTF??? Why, it is almost as if he is a smart person who decided to run for public office and, having worked quite hard for several years to get elected to that office, is determined to act like an adult! BOOO. [The Caucus]

• Joe the Plumber was the keynote speaker at the Houston Teabag Fiesta. And here’s a fun video of him autographing female breasts with a sharpie while talking about those “damn illegals.”
  [Think Progress]
• RedState intern Michele Bachmann writes about Dealergate, and some sort of Executive Order she is cosponsoring that will outlaw the census. [RedState]
• Matt Taibbi wrote a scathing customer review about Goldman Sachs in Rolling Stone, which you should definitely check out. And now Goldman is in a bit of a PR nightmare but no sweat, they still have all of our money. [Matt Taibbi]
• Andrew Sullivan is still groovin’ out to the eight tabs of LSD he ate on Saturday. The only question that remains: is he listening to Surrealistic Pillow or Volunteers? Curious minds want to know. [Andrew Sullivan]
• Have you heard the one where Harry Reid, Al Franken and a rabbi walk into a bar? [The Caucus]

Watching this weirdly edited video clip makes us feel like we just downed a coffee mug full of Liquid Vicodin, but perhaps you people will get something deeper, or maybe your heads will explode, just like poor Al Franken’s … or, Senator Al Franken’s head, right? [The Connecticut Forum]

For years now, various people have been begging to take photographs of Arizona’s State Flower MEGHAN McCAIN posing in her girdle. Well now there’s encouraging news for horticulture enthusiasts around the globe! Meghan says she’d totally do it, except poor PAPA JOHN would probably crash another plane into VIETNAM, if he ever found out. MORE »