Tag Archives: air force one

  Serious Empty Gestures Say The Most

Silly Obama, Air Force One Is Only For White Presidents

It was this or a hastily-shopped picture of Air Force One up on cinder blocks.
You may find this hard to believe, but not every Republican member of the House of Representatives thinks John Boehner’s Obama Sucks Act of 2014 is quite tough enough on Ineffectual Kenyan Usurper Weak Socialist Tyrant King Barack Hussein Obama. Instead of just passing a bill invalidating his recent executive action on immigration — which would just get vetoed anyway — some of Obama’s more strident teabagger critics want to vote for far stricter measures that would also just get vetoed, but would Send A Message. Read more on Silly Obama, Air Force One Is Only For White Presidents…
  come whine with me

Daily Caller Bombshell: Obamas Still Refusing To Take Greyhound Bus To Hawaii

The Daily Caller proved conclusively this weekend that Barack and Michelle Obama are the most pampered, spoiled, wasteful Imperial President and First Lady ever in the history of America, mostly by throwing out a whole lot of big numbers and suggesting that they’re shocking. The headline, “The Obamas Have Spent Over $44,351,777.12 In Taxpayer Cash On Travel” gets things started, using an absolutely infallible number from the highly reliable wingnut organization Judicial Watch, whose total is cited but not linked to, but that’s OK, you don’t need the details. Why, $44 million over five and a half years is a lot of vacations! And travel on official business, which the number also includes, without any actual breakdown of the two amounts. Heck, those five years of travel work out to just under 7 1/2 hours of the Iraq War, which just goes to show you (once again) how Barack Obama has no regard for We, The People’s muneez. Read more on Daily Caller Bombshell: Obamas Still Refusing To Take Greyhound Bus To Hawaii…
  he who reported the smell dealt it

Washington Free Beacon Super Squicked Out By Stinky Girls

This morning, Obama campaign spokeswoman Jen Psaki was on MSNBC (obviously, what with all the socialisms). Remarking how busy the campaign was, she said that she’d just gotten off the campaign and been able to shower for the first time in two days. …Wait for it…wait for it… The Washington Free Beacon decided to go hard on this lady’s vagina-filth and make a thing out of it. (Clip below the fold.) Read more on Washington Free Beacon Super Squicked Out By Stinky Girls…
  today in tabloids

Rupert Murdoch’s New York Post Furious U.S. President Sometimes Visits U.S. Cities

Rupert Murdoch’s New York Post has done some heavy digging, you guys, and it has discovered that the President of the United States of America sometimes go to the biggest city in the nation! Like, he was there just last week, “talking” at “the United Nations” as if that is somehow an important thing that the “president” is supposed to do. Did you know that it costs money for the city to host him? And New Yorkers are stuck picking up the bill (the Post says $2 million so far) when the Prez wants to fly his big fancy plane into JFK? What a dick! Read more on Rupert Murdoch’s New York Post Furious U.S. President Sometimes Visits U.S. Cities…
  hey pawlenty better luck next veepstakes

Romney Taps Ryan For VP: Our Tape-Delayed Liveblog To Honor America’s Olympians

In case you missed it, Mitt Romney picked Rep. Paul Ryan (WI) as his running mate. Here is how they did it: First, they notified Twitter. (Darrell Issa is convening a panel to investigate the national security leaks coming out of the Romney campaign.) Then they notified Paul Ryan maybe. This morning, Romney announced the pick officially through his smartphone app, which, if you downloaded, congratulations, because the Romney campaign now has your contact information for sexy Paul Ryan chats. At 9 AM, which is 6 AM Pacific time, which is a really, really smart and excellent time to have a big announcement on a Saturday morning, and which unfortunately precluded us from actually live-blogging this bullshit as was originally the plan because someone forgot to wake up and now all of a sudden I’m doing it, Romney and Ryan set foot on the U.S.S. Wisconsin, a former Naval battleship and government-run museum, to point out that the government has done nothing useful and should be destroyed. Read more on Romney Taps Ryan For VP: Our Tape-Delayed Liveblog To Honor America’s Olympians…
  sophie's choice

John Boehner Refused Air Force One Trip To Arizona So He Could Party

As we noted at the time, John Boehner’s plans for yesterday looked like this: cry about Gabrielle Giffords on the House floor for a couple of hours, then head over to get sloshed at an RNC cocktail party he was hosting that evening. Sure, it seemed a little silly at the time. But then there’s this: Boehner, like Nancy Pelosi and certain off-putting Arizona officials, was invited onto Air Force One to fly to Arizona to visit Giffords in the hospital and show solidarity or whatever at the memorial yesterday. But unlike those officials, he turned the White House down. Look, John Boehner cannot just drop his plans to party every time a member of Congress is shot in the head. Boehner, at the same time the memorial thing was happening, was showing his solidarity with red wine, which itself is a great patriot. Read more on John Boehner Refused Air Force One Trip To Arizona So He Could Party…
  the kind of people you have to sit next to on planes

Ben Quayle To Weird Out Barack Obama On Air Force One

Ben Quayle gets Air Force One ride to Arizona from “worst president in history.” Look who gets to go on the big-boy plane! There are few ways to bring more discomfort to the people of Arizona than forcing them to hug that wide-eyed toolbag. Ben Quayle is probably in the air right now, locating an old Snickers bar he left on the plane when his idiot father was in office and eating it in front of everyone to gross them out. [Halperin] Read more on Ben Quayle To Weird Out Barack Obama On Air Force One…
  rumors on the internets

Empress of Washingtonia’s Reign of Terror Continues

Michelle Antoinette and King Louis Hussein XIV held a ecstasy-rich dance party in petit-Versailles while the poor American people want only for bread and water. [Gateway Pundit] Adding to her numerous list of decadent crimes, the first lady also terrorized New York city personally, shouting “Let them eat cake!” from Air Force One. [HillBuzz] Read more on Empress of Washingtonia’s Reign of Terror Continues…
  so busted

How Can Obama Laugh When There Are Still Economic Problems?

Doesn’t Barack Obama and his gang of Chicago Thugs know it’s “wrong” in the eyes of the American Jesus to laugh at shit on the computer, when there are people out of work?! This photo was taken on Obama’s magic private jet, “Air Force One” (what, he can’t take Southwest like everybody else?) during a flight to “Asia,” whatever that means. Help us figure out what wingnut porn site Robert Gibbs has bookmarked to cheer up the boss. Read more on How Can Obama Laugh When There Are Still Economic Problems?…
  gay threesomes

What Gay Porno Are They Watching On Air Force One?

Alert UK journalist “Richard” sent us this Reuters pic, wondering what kind of movie Willie Mays and Robert Gibbs and the sleazy White House press pool enjoyed last night on the flight over to the MLB All-Star game. What do you people think? Read more on What Gay Porno Are They Watching On Air Force One?…
  marriage nuts

Insane Press Lady Dragged From Air Force One Press Area

Oh god this is too good: “The AP’s Christina Hoag reports that Brenda Lee, a reporter for the Georgia Informer, was dragged kicking and screaming from the press area near Air Force One at Los Angeles International airport (LAX) Thursday morning… KTLA reports that Lee is a self-proclaimed ‘Roman Catholic priestess.’ Lee claims she was attempting to deliver President Obama a letter urging him ‘to take a stand for traditional marriage.'” Ha ha ha WHAA?? There’s no such thing as a Roman Catholic priestess! Only Roman Catholic queens. Jesus. Just look at this insane clown having to be physically carried, by humans. Score another win for traditional marriage! Soon heterosexuals will all be DEAD. [HuffPo] Read more on Insane Press Lady Dragged From Air Force One Press Area…
  scary stunts

Fake 9/11 Cost $300,000

If you have ever wondered how much it costs to make 7 million New Yorkers all shit their pants at the same time, now you know: $300,000, which is actually kind of a bargain. According to Defense Secretary Robert Gates, that’s how much it cost to send a low-flying passenger jet on a little tour of Lower Manhattan and the Statue of Liberty a couple of weeks back. The cost of adult diapers, on the other hand, is expected to run into the billions. [MSNBC] Read more on Fake 9/11 Cost $300,000…
  draft impeachment papers

Michael Bloomberg Not Told About Obama’s Secret ‘Other’ 9/11

Remember when Barack Obama made 9/11 happen again with one of his “backup” Air Force Ones, just so a few schmucks could get tourist snapshots of such famous New York sights as the Muslim president crashing into the Statue of Liberty? Well no one even told Michael Bloomberg, the mayoral sprite of New York City, and he is furious! “Furious!” Barack Obama is the worst president in American history. [Clusterstock] Read more on Michael Bloomberg Not Told About Obama’s Secret ‘Other’ 9/11…
  always plotting against us

Obama Attacks Statue of Liberty

New York was TERRORIZED this morning by, guess who, Barack Obama and his Air Force One. People are still a little jumpy after that whole 9/11 thing, so when a huge passenger jet seemed to be headed for Lower Manhattan, and then for the Statue of Liberty, there was some freaking out. Why is Obama doing this to New York City? Seems he wanted a “cool picture” of his plane dive-bombing Lady Liberty! Read more on Obama Attacks Statue of Liberty…
  just fyi

Obama Lands In Mystical English Forest

Barack Obama’s Air Force One has successfully landed in England for the G-20 conference, where leaders from China, Russia, France, etc., are expected to be annoying. A tribe of local knickered hobbits swarmed the country airport and captured this disturbing footage. [YouTube] Read more on Obama Lands In Mystical English Forest…
 

No One Has Ever Been Funnier Than Hillary Clinton!

As those two chicks discussed this morning, Hillary made herself a HILLARE mock flight attendant speech to reporters yesterday! Haha, it was cute because she acted like a silly goat (humanizing points) while re-assuming the inevitable presidential role (inevitable presidential role points). Oxygen tanks were released and unfortunately no one died of suffocation. Read more on No One Has Ever Been Funnier Than Hillary Clinton!…
 

Mexi-Hater Tancredo Also a Goddamned Liar

During last night’s painfully long episode of “Grumpy Old GOP Men,” anti-Mexican crusader Tom Tancredo tried to distance himself from Spanish-mumbling taco-lover George W. Bush by claiming to have never been closer to Air Force One than the retired prop Air Force One in the Reagan Library. Read more on Mexi-Hater Tancredo Also a Goddamned Liar…
 

Jimmy Carter Personally Hauling Ford’s Corpse To Michigan

According to CNN, Israel-hating ex-president Jimmy Carter and his wife Rosslyn have been entrusted with the physically demanding job of bringing the dead body of pretend president Gerald Ford to Michigan, where it will be put under the snow in a solemn ice-fishing ceremony. Read more on Jimmy Carter Personally Hauling Ford’s Corpse To Michigan…
 

Gossip Roundup: More Indictments?

Heard on the Hill: Rep. Gary Ackerman (D-N.Y.) defends his manicures. . . Clintons had a late dinner at Cafe Milano last Thursday. [Roll Call] Cindy Adams: Expect “another 11″ indictments. [NYP] Read more on Gossip Roundup: More Indictments?…
 

Remainders: Only As Good As Your Last Meme

* What the fuck happened to the John Sweeney I used to know? Where’s the spirit? Where’s the guts, huh? “Ooh, we’re afraid to go with you Bluto, we might get in trouble.” [Hotline Blog] * What does Derek Whittenburg (motorist) think of the Senate Democrats stunt? “They’re high, or whatever.” [Jalopnik] * That old retired journalists are decrying Wikipedia only makes us love it more! [CNN] * On a slightly related note: We are increasingly sure that “addicted to oil” is not a metaphor, but a very serious physicial condition afflicting many of our elected represenatives. [PublicEye] * Hooray! Thanks to the tireless efforts of our anti-American journalists, the TV on Air Force One will be changed to CNN. [AJC] Read more on Remainders: Only As Good As Your Last Meme…
 

The Revolution Will Not Be Uploaded to YouTube

From the mailbag… Subject: is the video of some guy tagging Air Force One real? Dear Guerrilla marketer: gee, that viral video of graffiti artist, clothing designer, and entrepreneur Marc Ecko “tagging” Air Force One certainly is daring and exciting. It instills in us a strong urge to learn more about upcoming products — such as video games, say — that this Ecko character may or may not be releasing soon! Read more on The Revolution Will Not Be Uploaded to YouTube…