WASHINGTON, DC, 08:25 PM, MON OCTOBER 13 | Advertise on Wonkette | tips@wonkette.com | SUBMIT A TIP | RSS

Posts Tagged ‘advice’

Michele Bachmann Says Comical Thing About Economy

Thursday, September 18th, 2008

Staunch conservative baby harvester Rep. Michele Bachmann sez: “First we were told that Bear Stearns was too big to fail, then we were told that Freddie/Fannie were too big to fail, then we were told that AIG was too big to fail. What’s next, Starbucks too big to fail?” Ha ha ha, oh heavens, we think that might be a slap at the dreaded Liberals! Bachmann, as always, has hit upon something brilliant here that could carry the Republicans into landslide victories this fall: The government is flooding the economy with cash, ergo the Democrats must be behind this, and they will continue to bail out their “San Francisco values” companies if you elect them. “What’s next, STARBUCKS?” Marvelous. [ABC News]


You Must Give Hillary The Advice She’s Already Written!

Tuesday, June 3rd, 2008

Oh this is rich. You may remember when Hillary said in her speech tonight that she cannot make a Decision about the future, and that you should go to her website — www.HillaryClinton.com — to share your thoughts (and money). Sure enough, there’s a form! And how nice of Hillary to create this push poll for us, where she tells us exactly what to say. Now she can mention “all the passionate support” she’s received at some press conference in a few days when she announces her plans for Denver. So be sure to give Hillz your advice, but keep to the script. [Hillary Clinton]


Monday, May 19th, 2008

DEAR SLATE.COM ADVICE LADY: My family members are staunch Democrats and love to bad-mouth Republicans every time the conversation turns to politics. This is heartbreaking, because I myself am a secret Republican. My mom already knows that I’m in love with a Republican, and she won’t stop condemning him behind his back for his beliefs, calling him names like “right-wing whack job” and “little lord Republiroy” (also making fun of his height). My brothers all say stuff like, “Republicans suck” and, “Those Republicans are dumb-***es.” I am afraid to come out to them about my beliefs because of potential verbal abuse being heaped on me. Also, being a teenager, I do not have the advantage of moving out of the house and escaping said abuse. What should I do? [Dear Prudence/Slate]


Our Advice: Convince Him to Run For President

Thursday, March 8th, 2007

Last Week’s Shots: Worse Than AIDS

Monday, December 11th, 2006

wtflns.jpgAfter a brief hiatus (because nothing could ever beat this), Intern Lauren is back in the game. The forums of closed social-networking site Late Night Shots were full of earnest pleas for help this weekend, and wise, well-considered advice was to be found all over, if you knew where to look. Come with us on a journey of self-discovery. No turbos this week, just love.

Weight loss tips, condoms of yesteryear and women’s lib, after the jump.

MORE »


Ask Grand Ayatollah Ali Al-Sistani

Wednesday, August 16th, 2006

sistani.jpg

Take it from us, living under the teachings of Iraq Shiite leader Ali al-Sistani sometimes gets pretty complicated. Can I wear nail polish? Can I go to a cockfight? It’s a full-time job keeping all the edicts straight! Thankfully, al-Sistani’s got a helpful Web site that clearly lays out what’s what. Gossiping? It’s a sin. Shaking hands with women? Not under his watch. Ass-fucking? Well, er, that depends: MORE »


More Brian Doyle: Clear Evidence That Reagan-Hatred Is But a Symptom of Much Deeper Psychological Problems

Monday, April 10th, 2006

Are we the only ones who keep inadvertently thinking Bill Murray’s brother was arrested for sleazebaggery? MORE »


Bipolar Ex-Prostitute Senate Staffer? Ma’am, That Could Be Anyone

Tuesday, March 14th, 2006

So — big Iraq speech, poll numbers still plummeting, ‘06 and ‘08 campaigns starting to heat up, it’s shaping up to be a pretty big week. In a boring, exactly-like-the-last-few-weeks sense. Meanwhile, over on craigslist, real human drama continues to be played out daily:
bipolarsenate.jpg
Answers to her dilemma are welcome, of course (we’re gonna toss out a “no, probably not,” but we’re no Carolyn Hax, so you needn’t listen to us), but, obviously, we’re more interested in her job. All right, people, whose office has the pregnancy-faking crazy chick? MORE »