Here’s the RNC’s fancy new web ad arguing that Ben Nelson or any other moderate Democrats would be hypocrites if they didn’t filibuster a motion to proceed on a health care bill. They claim that this would be akin to John Kerry’s famous “for it before I was against it” line on Iraq funding in 2004, which is wrong, although John Kerry is still terrible at speaking. But! We do appreciate the RNC’s production here, for the first time ever. The menacing, twitching figures, the repetition, the gritty industrial vibe. Too bad no one will ever see it. [Washington Independent]

Here’s a great new ad from the anti-gay-marriage amendment crusaders in whatever state is “doing that” now… ah, super gay Washington state. God and the Jesus made marriage for men and women, so they could fuck and have children and play in piles of leaves. How would you heteros like it in you’re splashing leaves with your children Little Johnny reaches into the pile only to grab the exposed cock of a hidden homo? You simply would not care for that. UPDATE: Oh hey what is this about permissions now? Just click the link. Dumb “Vimeo.” [Vimeo]

Variations of this new Starbucks ad have been on the television recently, for some new coffee dongle. Essentially, “now you can pay a shitload for our instant coffee too!” But town halls are dead, is the point. They’ve been dead for a month or so, and now they are dead-dead. [YouTube]

Noth’ing. [Thank you Drudge-refreshing operative "Tim H."]

Ah, well don’t we feel stupid, Barack Obama’s “fired up, ready to go” Civil War re-enactment at a packed University of Maryland Comcast Center yesterday was, in fact, just a music video shoot! This one-minute DNC ad “will air on national cable and in the DC area, as well as on 40 liberal blogs.” AD $$$ YOU SAY? Hmm, we better brush up on our bona fides… REPBULICANS SUCK. END EVERY WAR. BE GAY. Pleeeeease? [First Read]

Well look at this! The DNC has made the decision to go out of its way, now, to engage Dick Cheney and his cartoonish teevee babble about murder and blood and global sadness. Maybe now that the mighty DNC has spoken up, teevee anchors will be too scared to bring Dick Cheney on their shows to tell his lies! This is how things work, on television. [Greg Sargent]

Here’s a fresh, confrontational new DNC ad telling people (rightly) to expect violent, insane crowds of mouth-breathing wingnuts at their local health care town halls this month unless they call the RNC immediately and ask, “please rein in your violent, insane crowds of mouth-breathing wingnuts at my local health care town halls.” But according to rich telephone-owning operative “RoseAnn,” the RNC number provided in the ad just takes you right back to the lousy gay Democrats: “When you call the RNC to complain … they connect you to the DNC - i called back and pushed const. affairs instead and the lady there laughed about it - and said the dems called us nazis so we have to fight fire w/ fire….” Another exciting Wednesday in Washington! [YouTube]

Ugh this DSCC ad has about a million problems with it. Number one, only one of these people is a “quitter” in the sense of “throwing a weird hissy fit in front of a flock of honking geese and leaving one’s job for no discernible purpose.” MORE »

Just in time for Video Friday comes the RNC’s latest Guantanamo Bay video, outlining the very serious position that all but six members of the United States Senate have taken with regard to prisoner detention. [Balloon Juice]

The RNC made a good decision here to hedge its incomprehensibility with a disclaimer in the first frame: “Political Satire.” So remember when you’re watching this ad: it’s just “Political Satire.” You cannot apply for an ObamaCard because there is no such thing. “Political Satire.” Speaking of credit cards, remember when all-but-one of these very Republicans voted to preserve the ObamaCard companies’ usurious practices today? [Boston Globe]

Contextual ads sure can be a bitch sometimes. So can regular, contracted ads that the website owner approves! But this is not to make light of the very terrible thing that did happen in Binghamton. [AP]