acorn
Totally Not Lying Men’s Rights Activist Is Your Newest James O’Keefe!
This bloke, Reno, he is quite a bloke! As a men’s rights activist, he totally GOTCHAED all those harpies who only pretend to care about domestic violence, when they really just want to falsely accuse these gallant knights of unspeakable acts what are not true. They also want to murder all our bepenised brethren and [...]
James O’Keefe: ‘History Will Absolve Me! Also Send Cash!’
Yesterday, as first reported by your Wonkette (<–COPY LINK HERE, LA TIMES), the world rejoiced upon news that the insufferable date-rapey Dennis the Menace clone known as James O’Keefe III had settled his lawsuit with a former ACORN employee to the tune of $100,000 plus one weak ass nonpology. Twitter erupted in a sea of Nelson [...]
Wonket Sexclusive: Totally Blameless Crime-Stopper James O’Keefe To Pay $100,000 To ACORN Criminal
James O’Keefe—the blonde bombshell who set the conservative world of hidden-camera YouTube movies ablaze—has just agreed to a $100,000 settlement to calm down the unjustly fired (and weirdly litigious about it) ACORN employee Juan Carlos Vera. According to a copy of the deal, obtained late last night by your wonkettes and viewable after the jump, [...]
Heroic Republicans Will Murder Zombie ACORN Again And Again For Freedumb
Remember back in 2009 when selectively edited pimp videos became all the rage? No of course you do not because 2009 was like one million years ago in internet time. Take a trip back to the Mesozoic Era with yr Wonkette, won’t you? In 2009 we had to endure the smug face of James O’Keefe [...]
Romney Campaign Finds New Goon To Love
News that the Romney campaign has taken on top gun “electoral strategist” Nathan Sproul gets unsurprisingly little attention. Distinguishing this Sproul from other vague shapes now buzzing the Citizen’s United honeywagon are long-buried reports of behavior that gives oppressive right-wing polluter-friendly theocracy a bad name. Lone, widely spaced APBs lean heavily on words like “goon,” [...]
Voter ID Bill’s Newest Victim: GOP Lawmaker Who Shouted ‘Sieg Heil’
Why was New Hampshire Rep. Steve Vaillancourt so upset in debate over a proposed voter ID law? UNCLEAR. Except that House Speaker William O’Brien “restricted what he could address.” O’Brien had restricted what Vaillancourt could say about the full bill, saying that he could not reference the House Election Law Committee’s discussion, only the issues [...]
Super-Slick James O’Keefe Wannabe Tries To ACORN Everybody While They Point And Laugh
Just because you are busy suing and getting sued by every partner you have ever had is no reason to ever turn your back for a second, James O’Keefe. That is when a newer, prettier, younger you will All About Eve you every time! So what super-slick moves is newest James O’Keefe apostle/role-stealer Mr. John [...]
Fox News Sets Up Voter Intimidation Tip Line To Protect You From Blacks
For years, ACORN and the New Black Panthers have stood outside polling stations to intimidate US. Why would a good (white) citizen even try to go into such a place? Obviously, they would be murdered on the spot. And yes, although democracy is worth dying for, it’s not worth dying and MISSING A WHOLE SEASON [...]
James O’Keefe Tries To Get CNN Reporter Onto His Dildo Lube Boat
CNN is doing a documentary on the three or four people who are young American conservative activists, so they decided they would follow around that criminal James O’Keefe, the guy who made those ACORN videos and tried to rape Mary Landrieu’s phones. But you know the one thing they weren’t expecting? They weren’t expecting James [...]
The Ashes of 10,000 Cigarettes: Ayn Rand In the 21st Century
This is it — the penultimate edition of Ayn Rand’s graphic novel Chick Tract! Come and join Ayn in the objectivist climax of our story, there’s only one left after this one, baby!
ACORN Will Return With the Aztecs and Mitt Romney In 2012
Oh you thought ACORN went away forever? You are an April Fool because ACORN is just “reinventing” itself and when its good and ready it’ll resurrect and freak everyone out, just as Jesus once did. [RedState] Andrew Sullivan has a new Internet hobby: Looking at pictures of dudes with beards eating cupcakes. [The Daily Dish] [...]
Nobama’s Evil Plan Photographed In Dallas
Wonkette operative “Brian P.” emails this important dispatch from Texas: “I’m sending this to let you know the Final Solution is proceeding according to plan in Dallas, Texas. It’s all happening!” ACORN has not been vanquished by Patriots at all! It’s now the official pharmacy of Obamacare!
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