Straight from our “You have GOT to be fucking kidding me” desk: Marissa Alexander, the Florida woman sentenced to 20 years in prison for firing three warning shots into the wall of her home while escaping from her (allegedly) abusive husband, is moving toward a new trial, so that is the good news, insofar as […]

Hey look! It’s another day, so let’s talk more about the IRS non-scandal, because apparently there is no end to the Republican appetite for self-embarrassment. As we all know, there has been absolutely no evidence of wrongdoing by the IRS in the whole kerfuffle over targeting Tea Party groups’ tax-exempt status. But you can’t put […]

Ok wonkeroos, we need to talk about a serious subject that is threatening far too many of our most vulnerable citizens: bullying and abuse. While we like to snark and mock, we, as a country, should be doing everything we can to make our society a better safer place. Rep. Sean Duffy (R-Season 5) knows […]

Hey, kids, looks like another candidate has tossed his asshat into the ring for our Legislative Shitmuffin of the Year contest! The newest contendah is New Hampshire state Rep. Mark Warden (R-Fuck This Guy), who was one of four members of an NH House committee to vote in favor of reducing the penalty for some […]

Oh, Wisconsin, baby, what happened to us? Don’t you remember when it used to be so sweet? It was Laverne & Shirley, and Donna Shalala at Madison, and … hell, sweetheart, why can’t I remember any more? It’s a whole lifetime ago, it seems like. It’s like I don’t even know you. And now there’s […]

Every inhabitant in the entire solar system and possibly as far away as the alternate universe where Rick Santorum becomes the American president has now heard the story about wingnut Arizona sheriff Paul Babeu trying to deport his secret illegal Mexican gay lover, but did you know that this was only one of two insane […]

In an incident in which the perpetrator should have considered that he would become a household name on Wonkette before going through with it, former Missouri House Speaker Rod Jetton is facing assault charges for allegedly beating the shit out of his mistress while having sex. His ladyfriend had not uttered the “safe word,” probably […]

Good Lord. When Joe Biden talks about growing up in Scranton with all its hardscrabble charms, is he referring to its feces-scented apartments full of food-hoarding ex-cons or its large population of grifters who parasitize the child welfare system?

Marcus “Black-Chop” Epstein (someone come up with a better nickname!), seen here with drunk popinjay Christopher Hitchens at one of Reason magazine’s monthly medieval blood orgies, will not enroll at UVA law school this fall, according to the university’s Dean of Admissions in reply to queries from TPM and, more reliably, a Wonkette commenter. And […]

YOU SCOOPED US, WASHINGTON POST. We thought the same thing today! When Barack Obama reversed his decision to release photographic evidence of authorized-from-the-top, brutal, illegal detainee abuse that would have compelled the DoJ to prosecute people for crimes (MUST NEVER HAPPEN), we thought about how AWESOME this will be politically, just like that time Bill […]

So Iowa is underwater forever, and to the nation’s shock, FEMA has sent out emergency response teams — to help! This is only the second time in world history that FEMA has helped anyone, the other being the time they released that “How To Deal With Satellites That Crash Into Your Skull” manual. Perhaps they […]