Tag Archives: abuse

  Next Time Just Stick To Gluttony And Sloth

Pervy Nonagenarian Televangelist Did … Oh Jesus Christ

Now grab the back of your TV set...
It’s been a while since we’ve heard from the faith-healing ministry leader and televangelist Ernest Angley, who was also the the real-life inspiration for Robin Williams’s classic “Reverend Earnest Angry.” Until 35 years later, when Monday we read that Rev. Angley is doing his very best to out-Bake Jim Bakker and Out-Swagger Jimmy Swaggart. Those chumps may have been satisfied with mere sexxytimes shenanigans and fraud (Bakker), and sad masturbatory prostie visits (Swaggart), but by Crom, no way were such penny-ante scandals going to be enough for Ernest Angley. No, he’s going to close out his 60-something-year career with accusations of full-blown cultism, complete with creepy control over his flock’s sex lives — forcing men to have vasectomies and women to have abortions — and to top it off, several years of unwanted laying on of hands on a former pastor and allowing sexual abuse of boys in the church, allegedly. Read more on Pervy Nonagenarian Televangelist Did … Oh Jesus Christ…
  double standard your ground

Florida Woman In ‘Stand Your Ground’ Retrial Faces Late-Term Abortion Of Justice, Also 60 Years

Straight from our “You have GOT to be fucking kidding me” desk: Marissa Alexander, the Florida woman sentenced to 20 years in prison for firing three warning shots into the wall of her home while escaping from her (allegedly) abusive husband, is moving toward a new trial, so that is the good news, insofar as there is any good news in this insane case. This being Florida, of course, there is also a “however”: thanks to another ruling in a completely separate case, and the fact that she is not a white man shooting unarmed children, Alexander will now face triple the prison time — 60 years, not 20 — if she’s convicted. Let us unravel the whole sordid mess; we encourage you to drink and/or to remove any breakables from the immediate area. Read more on Florida Woman In ‘Stand Your Ground’ Retrial Faces Late-Term Abortion Of Justice, Also 60 Years…
  gnomes

Republicans Wasting $14 Million On IRS Non-Scandal Investigation. Food Stamps Still Being Cut.

Hey look! It’s another day, so let’s talk more about the IRS non-scandal, because apparently there is no end to the Republican appetite for self-embarrassment. As we all know, there has been absolutely no evidence of wrongdoing by the IRS in the whole kerfuffle over targeting Tea Party groups’ tax-exempt status. But you can’t put a price on liberty, and it’s not like Congress is wasting literally millions of taxpayer dollars on this fruitless witch hunt, right? IRS Commissioner John Koskinen [released a letter] documenting the significant funds expended by the IRS in responding to Congressional inquiries to date, including $8 million in direct costs—such as salaries, benefits, and travel—and an additional $6 million to $8 million to add capacity to information technology systems to process materials to investigators. For that kind of money, we would buy the finest muffins and bagels in all the land. And then we would gay marry every lawn gnome in America! Holy waste, fraud, and abuse, wonketeers! Let’s scandalsplore.  Read more on Republicans Wasting $14 Million On IRS Non-Scandal Investigation. Food Stamps Still Being Cut….
  cruz control

Ted Cruz’s Guide To Unmake Friends And Alienate People, Part Infinity

Ok wonkeroos, we need to talk about a serious subject that is threatening far too many of our most vulnerable citizens: bullying and abuse. While we like to snark and mock, we, as a country, should be doing everything we can to make our society a better safer place. Rep. Sean Duffy (R-Season 5) knows this as well as anyone, per TPM: Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) continued to draw the scorn of House Republicans on Friday when Rep. Sean Duffy (R-WI) fumed that Senate conservatives have “bullied” and “abused” their counterparts in the lower chamber throughout the push to defund Obamacare. Wait a sec. We don’t think those words mean what he thinks they mean.  Read more on Ted Cruz’s Guide To Unmake Friends And Alienate People, Part Infinity…
  live free or get beaten by your spouse

N.H. State Rep. Has Refreshingly Non-Judgmental Views On Wife Beating, ‘Cause Some People Are Into That, He Guesses

Hey, kids, looks like another candidate has tossed his asshat into the ring for our Legislative Shitmuffin of the Year contest! The newest contendah is New Hampshire state Rep. Mark Warden (R-Fuck This Guy), who was one of four members of an NH House committee to vote in favor of reducing the penalty for some cases of simple assault from a misdemeanor to a “violation-level offense.” Speaking in support of the reduced penalty, Warden explained it’s merely a matter of accommodating different lifestyle choices, you know, to be considerate of the wife-beaters. Read more on N.H. State Rep. Has Refreshingly Non-Judgmental Views On Wife Beating, ‘Cause Some People Are Into That, He Guesses…
  you know I love you baby you just make me so mad

Wisconsin State Rep: Abused Wives Should Remember What They Loved About Their Husbands in the First Place

Oh, Wisconsin, baby, what happened to us? Don’t you remember when it used to be so sweet? It was Laverne & Shirley, and Donna Shalala at Madison, and … hell, sweetheart, why can’t I remember any more? It’s a whole lifetime ago, it seems like. It’s like I don’t even know you. And now there’s this Don Pridemore guy, cosponsoring the Single Mothers Are the Real Abusers bill and just moving right in like he owns the place. What does he give you that we didn’t, besides going on record as being against divorce even in the case of an abusive spouse? “There’s been a huge change over the last 30 years, and a lot of that change has been the choice of the women,” he said. “If they can refind those reasons and get back to why they got married in the first place it might help.” Read more on Wisconsin State Rep: Abused Wives Should Remember What They Loved About Their Husbands in the First Place…
  republicans in the news

Paul Babeu Allegedly Slept With Student At Reeducation Camp He Ran

Every inhabitant in the entire solar system and possibly as far away as the alternate universe where Rick Santorum becomes the American president has now heard the story about wingnut Arizona sheriff Paul Babeu trying to deport his secret illegal Mexican gay lover, but did you know that this was only one of two insane stories about Babeu’s serially creepy, unethical behavior that reporters were learning about at the time? ABC15 in Arizona was also about to out Babeu after they spent five months digging up dirt from court documents in Massachusetts alleging that Paul Babeu’s 1999-2001 tenure as the evil headmaster of an unlicensed private reeducation camp gulag for troubled teens included the use of punishments that amounted to physical abuse and that oh yeah, his sister says he was shacked up with one of his male students. Paul Babeu sure does seem to enjoy the secretive sexytime with members of vulnerable groups that he treats like shit in his official capacities! Where else has Paul Babeu worked? Nevermind, we don’t actually want to know. Read more on Paul Babeu Allegedly Slept With Student At Reeducation Camp He Ran…
  dickcember

Former Missouri House Speaker (R) Beats Up, Chokes Mistress During Sex [UPDATE]

In an incident in which the perpetrator should have considered that he would become a household name on Wonkette before going through with it, former Missouri House Speaker Rod Jetton is facing assault charges for allegedly beating the shit out of his mistress while having sex. His ladyfriend had not uttered the “safe word,” probably because Jetton was beating her unconscious. Read more on Former Missouri House Speaker (R) Beats Up, Chokes Mistress During Sex [UPDATE]…
  feces everywhere

Biden’s Hometown Is Living Hell For Exchange Students

Good Lord. When Joe Biden talks about growing up in Scranton with all its hardscrabble charms, is he referring to its feces-scented apartments full of food-hoarding ex-cons or its large population of grifters who parasitize the child welfare system? Read more on Biden’s Hometown Is Living Hell For Exchange Students…
  ha ha hate crimes

Tom Tancredo African-Chopper Will Not Be Attending Law School This Fall

Marcus “Black-Chop” Epstein (someone come up with a better nickname!), seen here with drunk popinjay Christopher Hitchens at one of Reason magazine’s monthly medieval blood orgies, will not enroll at UVA law school this fall, according to the university’s Dean of Admissions in reply to queries from TPM and, more reliably, a Wonkette commenter. And what’s this! And this! [TPM] Read more on Tom Tancredo African-Chopper Will Not Be Attending Law School This Fall…
  keep children away from this newspaper

Check Out Today’s Great Comedy Article In The Washington Post!

YOU SCOOPED US, WASHINGTON POST. We thought the same thing today! When Barack Obama reversed his decision to release photographic evidence of authorized-from-the-top, brutal, illegal detainee abuse that would have compelled the DoJ to prosecute people for crimes (MUST NEVER HAPPEN), we thought about how AWESOME this will be politically, just like that time Bill Clinton didn’t care for a black rapper during a campaign and a few conservative voters mused, “Okay, well, as long as he hates the blacks too…” Read more on Check Out Today’s Great Comedy Article In The Washington Post!…
  old coots

Old FEMA Coot Beats Up Guy With Golf Club, In Iowa

So Iowa is underwater forever, and to the nation’s shock, FEMA has sent out emergency response teams — to help! This is only the second time in world history that FEMA has helped anyone, the other being the time they released that “How To Deal With Satellites That Crash Into Your Skull” manual. Perhaps they could create a follow-up manual now called “How To Deal With FEMA Emergency Contractors Who Arbitrarily Beat The Shit Out Of You With Golf Clubs, In Iowa, After Trying To Hit You With Their Cars.” Because! An Incident! Read more on Old FEMA Coot Beats Up Guy With Golf Club, In Iowa…
 

Did Oklahoma Sheriff Keep Sex Slaves In County Jail?

An Oklahoma sheriff has quit his post after being charged with committing pretty much every sexual crime in the book against a number of female prisoners. For example, “rape by instrumentation.” If he’s convicted, he may serve up to 467 years in prison. Join us on a terrible sex tour of all the foul horrors former Custer County Sheriff Mike Burgess may have committed! Read more on Did Oklahoma Sheriff Keep Sex Slaves In County Jail?…
 

Republican Wife-Beater Has Notable Lack of Sexual Perversions

The Summer of Cum has roots going back as far as last Blovember. Back in those dark days we told you the story of Mark Olson, Minnesota State legislator, Republican, friend to Michele Bachmann, and crazy-eyed wife-beater. His case finally came to trial this month. Join us as we explore the disturbing details. Read more on Republican Wife-Beater Has Notable Lack of Sexual Perversions…
 

Daily Briefing: We Want A Butterfly

New bipartisan congressional report shows that the Homeland Security Department abuses no-bid deals, poorly trains managers. “32 Homeland Security Department contracts worth a total of $34 billion have ‘experienced significant overcharges, wasteful spending, or mismanagement.'” [WP] Read more on Daily Briefing: We Want A Butterfly…