abortion
House Republicans have given up their noble battle to change what counts as rape in their latest proposed bill to ban federal funding for abortions (except, as it has always been, in cases such as rape). It’s a cowardly compromise that upsets a proud nation of people who all hope one day they too will [...]
After receiving criticism for approving funding to pay Bristol Palin tens of thousands of dollars to speak there, Washington University in St. Louis has finally bowed to pressure after realizing it is, in fact, a real school. The group responsible for hiring Bristol put out a statement stating that they talked to her and jointly [...]
Not content with capitalizing on measly humans, the world’s business leaders are meeting to discuss how to best nickel-and-dime our alien friends (don’t miss this fantastic infographic!). [ExoNews] Donald Trump does not like the Chinese very much, which is ironic considering they both enjoy the gaudy, gold-gilded, bourgeois style of a New Jersey tanning heiress. [...]
According to Steve King, Steve King likes to tell young schoolchildren a story about a strange man walking to their school and sticking a thing of his through the door of their classroom. No, not that thing, a gun! And then the gunman shoots children like them. This happens all the time, he says. And [...]
Michelle Antoinette’s fashion atrocities continue to destroy lives overseas, but worry not, the fashion police are hot on her Allah-chic heels. [Michelle Obama's Mirror] Give the gift of jar-fetus to all the loved ones this Christmas with a Planned Parenthood buy-one get-one-free abortion coupon. [Now Public] Obviously you can’t water the Tree of Liberty with [...]
Who knew Carl Paladino would be so much fun, what with his homosexual gay-man night clubs and the boobies and the gay parades? We thought he was just an ignorant boring gazillionaire creep who forced racist porn on his underlings!
You may have heard that the Republicans this year are all about being fiscally conservative and getting back to our “original Constitution,” which means that there will be more misinformed, spittle-drenched rants about taxes and deficits and fewer misinformed, spittle-drenched rants about the gays and the unborn. But never fear, they still care about that [...]
Isn’t it just awful how America’s coffers are being emptied to fund baby-killing right here at Home? Why isn’t all of our money being spent to build cool laser-guided zeppelins, for killing babies in brown people countries? These are important questions, and Mike Pence has a talking point. “To those who say we should focus [...]
While preaching to a crowd of hipster-lads, pastor and part-time Johnny Cash impersonator Jim Garlow explains why nobody in America can find a job. It’s because everyone has been aborted, so there’s no one left to buy any new stuff.
