Tag Archives: 2014 Midterm Elections

  fringe candidate watch 2014

Idiot Republican Changes Name, Seems Pretty Sure Latino Voters Don’t Know Cesar Chavez Is Dead

Let’s say you’re a complete unknown in Arizona who failed to win as a write-in Tea Party candidate for Congress in 2012, and then lost a campaign for Phoenix City Council in 2013. Maybe you’d have better luck with some name recognition? So former nobody Scott Fistler legally changed his name to “Cesar Chavez” and is now running as a Democrat to replace retiring congressman Ed Pastor. Can’t possibly go wrong, because your Latino voters are going to see the name of the famous guy on there and figure that after dying in 1993, the activist and civil rights leader has rested up and deserves a seat in Congress. We do have to at least agree that this much of Fistler/Chavez’s story sounds plausible: Fistler’s name change petition, filed last November, said plaintively, “I have experienced many hardships because of my name[.]” No doubt. Read more on Idiot Republican Changes Name, Seems Pretty Sure Latino Voters Don’t Know Cesar Chavez Is Dead…
  How can we miss you if you don't stay away?

Bob Barr To Attempt Worst Comeback Tour Since Great White

Speaking of the resurrection of hateful twats, did you guys hear that Bob Barr wants to return to Congress? America had a very close call last year with the state of Georgia, when human-shaped fluffernutter Newt Gingrich came within a couple of thousand delegates of being the GOP’s nominee for president instead of whatshisname, the guy with the hair. Then Saxby Chambliss, a man we know must be horrible because the NRA loves him, announced his retirement from the Senate. Perhaps America would get lucky and he would be replaced with someone who is not a total cockwagon? Read more on Bob Barr To Attempt Worst Comeback Tour Since Great White…
  woman of wealth and taste

Conservatives Attacking Ashley Judd Mistakenly Focus On Her Awesome Political Beliefs Instead Of Her Crappy Movies

Vagina-American Ashley Judd is rumored to be in the early stages of a establishing a campaign against Senate Minority leader and real life one-dimensional House of Cards stereotype Mitch McConnell. Judd would enter the race with excellent financing, is universally well known, and is a genuinely nice person who devotes her time to fighting sexual violence in the Congo. Given Judd’s appeal, Republicans are understandably freaking out at the prospect of her facing a cynically evil power broker whose face also functions as an art school entrance exam. Their response therefore has been focused on the subtle and delicate political message of telling Kentucky voters that SHE’S A WITCH- BURN HER WITH FIRE: By getting in the race with this sort of baggage, Judd runs the risk of being portrayed as a Todd Akin-esque candidate – meaning voters simply decide she’s unqualified to serve as a senator, because her comments are so outrageous and extreme that people can’t bring themselves to vote for her. So is the Daily Caller always going to have to explicitly state for its readers why Todd Akin’s “Rape Babies are Kewl” stance was a bad thing in terms of his electoral chances? Read more on Conservatives Attacking Ashley Judd Mistakenly Focus On Her Awesome Political Beliefs Instead Of Her Crappy Movies…