Monday, October 19th, 2009
RON PAUL HEADS TO IOWA! WOW, this LEDE: “Revolutionary Republican, courageous conservative congressman and Constitution defending former presidential candidate, Ron Paul is coming to Iowa November 14th, to support Kent Sorenson’s state Senate seat bid.” The Iowa Republican might as well have just taken a picture of itself covered in the dust jacket of an Andy Warhol biography and texted it to Ron Paul. Gross gross. [The Iowa Republican via Glenn Thrush]











HA! What have we here, buried in this nothing news item about Tim Pawlenty going to headline the “Ronald Reagan Dinner,” the proceeds of which benefit Republicans In Iowa, or Republicans From Iowa, or Republicans Without Iowa, something like that. Ummm… voila: “In July, organizers of the event had said they had tried to line up former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin, the 2008 vice presidential nominee.” It is too bad that the Iowa Republicans were unable to convince, with money, their first choice of speaker and instead had to settle for someone who did not quit their governorship. Tim Pawlenty this is embarrassing! Do not do this! [
Huzzah, Rick Santorum! The former Pennsylvania senator, dog-sex fetishist, 

South Carolina granola hippie Mark Sanford just couldn’t take the pressure, man, so he put on his Tevas and
Have you ever gone to a buffet and seen, say, three dishes such as lobster, chocolate cake, and cocaine, and wondered which of these delights to sample first? That is precisely the dilemma facing Republican voters as they ponder the upcoming 2012 general election, which starts in precisely one thousand-ish days.
When Mitt Romney nears an election of his — only four more years-ish! — he transforms into his super-funny lying clown alter ego, “Mittens,” who literally believes in nothing and will simply invent exquisite lies or make fun of Bob Dole if that’s what’s demanded of him in the very short term. He’s harmless and terrible. Now he is selling all of his residences, because having lots of houses was embarrassing for John McCain for about hmm, a week?, last year. Which house is he keeping? The summer vacation home in… New Hampshire, of course! Why he just woke up one morning and decided he wanted to “winter” in the summer home from now on! [